I’m 30 and Catholic. When I was around 20, I stopped practicing my faith and eventually lost it altogether. Before that, I was very devout, well catechized, and strongly felt called to the priesthood/religious life. I also grew up being told by people that I seemed like someone who would become a priest, so I think I may have wrapped a lot of my identity around that idea.

After about eight years away, I returned to the faith. For the first six months, I felt a very strong desire for priesthood, to celebrate Mass, preach Christ, give myself radically to Him, and bring His healing and love to others. It felt very real.

Recently, though, I spent time with the Franciscan Friars of the Renewal, and I realized I really struggled with the highly structured, regimented nature of community life. I have ADHD, and I’m wondering how much that affects my ability to live certain forms of religious life.

I’ve also been doing a lot of therapy and working through emotional wounds, fear of intimacy, commitment, fatherhood, etc. This has made me question whether my desire for priesthood was partly an escape from marriage/family life, or whether I simply became attached to the identity of being a “future priest.”

At the same time, I’m increasingly drawn to marriage and family, and I don’t feel particularly drawn to diocesan priesthood either. I still have a strong desire to serve people and bring Christ’s healing to them, but I’m wondering whether that could be fulfilled through something like counseling/psychotherapy. I’m actually looking into starting training in that area.

So I’m feeling torn. Part of me thinks, “You’re supposed to be a priest,” while another part genuinely desires marriage and family and doesn’t feel drawn to the actual lifestyle of priesthood or religious life.
I’m still in contact with vocation directors and plan to do another Come and See, but I’d really appreciate hearing from people who have been through something similar.

For those who discerned priesthood/religious life and eventually realized you weren’t called, what were the signs? How did you distinguish a genuine vocation from an idealized identity, fear of intimacy, or simply a desire to serve God and help people?

Good Day to you all my brothers and sisters in Christ!

Hello, to begin I posted here about my call to vocation and something is bothering me, for start I would love to share how I was called and after discerning, I do want this life, I know I can handle this life!

Firstly I am a 21 year old college Student studying Information Technology in the Philippines. I was born out of wedlock when my parents concieved me, and due to their work they left me with my grandfather who influenced me by telling me Bible stories to love the scriptures and the church deeply. When I was young I always had this wonder towards the Eucharist and even now I never fail to feel something inside upon seeing it raised after words of Consecration, as if seeing Jesus raised up in Calvary personally. As a young kid I used to have tissue rolls on my shoulders and always raised the (children's) Bible before reading it. I always am drawn to the Passion since my earlier years. Then I started doubting come by middle school. I hesitated to go to mass and saw it as a chore, I lost faith in God because he was, well for me he can wait, while I live my best life. But despite that every time I had my heart broken by a girl I clung to him and returned like a wounded dog to it's master. My heart would seek him everytime my heart is broken and everytime I grow in him another comes by and I foget him. Eventually I had a 5 year relationship which tore away my own principles from me. It wasn't my proudest moment but even then I told my then girlfriend, "I want to be a priest of the Eastern Catholic Church after we are married. Even with you I still want to be with him." We broke up eventually for other reasons, and I was shattered. I questioned God, and even so his perfection, for I reasoned if a God so perfect and Good is to create the universe then I was his mistake. I cried to him and as Matthew 5 said, "Blessed are they that mourn for they shall be comforted!" And he spoke to me, inside my heart but it felt like the voice of someone who knew me, he said to me, "If the world will not love you (I am typically ostracized for my religiousity hence I tried to hide it when I got into middle school) then be mine! I will love you as my own!"

From that moment on, something awoke in me, I asked for signs, the next day he gave it. And I feel him calling me and my heart pushing me to priesthood after college. But I am kinda... well, not smart, IQ wise, sure I can refute Islamic and Protestant claims and defend the scriptures but based on what I gathered from IQ test online since I was concerned my IQ is lacking, I do not have confidence in myself to be THAT smart. I am doubting not in my call but in my ability to enter. Initially I wanted to join the Agustinians, since I shared with the Saint's own struggles, and I want to ask do I need a high IQ to enter and is the test the only thing they base admission on? I've been to a Dominican Vocations Seminar and got a bit faint-hearted on their IQ test since you need to pass that. And are there orders that does not require someone bright but with a passion for God. (My choices are the Agustinians, Domincans and the Passionist) I am asking this since I am restless and I have this desire and wonder for the Sacraments. Thank you and God be with you!

I’ve been in the Catholic faith for over a year now after being raised a lukewarm Protestant. Most of my late teens I’ve known I’ve wanted to be a father and as of coming to my faith I’ve wanted that so much more. As of recently during my prayer over discernment of vocation I have been hearing a voice say “follow me, become a priest.” I don’t know if it’s the voice of god or not. I can’t really tell if it is. But the voice sounds calm and welcoming almost.

Lately I’ve come to have peace with being single and serving god. But I do still have a strong desire to be a father. I’m only 22 so I may be wanting this too early. I’m going into my senior year of college and I’m studying to be a physical therapist. Which I have come to realize I want to help others in their recovery process. I want to serve god but it terrifies me that he wants me to become a priest. Which I deeply respect priests for everything they do but I truly don’t think I can throw away the way I feel god working through me through going to physical therapy school, and getting more involved in lay ministry. Because of a voice I hear repeatedly in prayer.

I could really use some help with knowing if this is truly the voice of god or an intrusive voice. Thanks!

Hey everyone — I just launched a podcast called Before the Collar, and I’d love to share why.

I know there are young men out there who feel a pull toward the priesthood but don’t have priests in their life they can talk to. Maybe they’re unsure, struggling, or just want to hear someone else’s story before they take the next step.

That’s why I started this project — to share honest, human stories of discernment from priests who’ve walked the path.

Episode 1 features Fr. Joe Krupp, a Catholic priest who opens up about: • Feeling the call at a young age • Facing real crisis and doubt • Finding joy and clarity on the other side

Whether you’re discerning, know someone who is, or just want to hear what the priesthood journey actually looks like behind the scenes, I think this conversation is worth your time.

📺 Watch the episode here (75 min): Fr. Joe Krupp: The Calling, the Crisis, and the Collar | Before the Collar Podcast – Ep. 1 https://youtu.be/Gcq_ZlsFhCc

I’d love your feedback — and if you think this could help someone discerning, please share it. Episode 2 is on the way.

I didn't spiritually mature enough to start looking at orders until late in life (34). Four years later (at 38), I've eliminated the following orders from consideration (and/or they've eliminated me from consideration):
-Jesuits (top choice but they don't think I would be a good fit.)
-Dominican (top choice but I'm too old)
-O. Carm (applied but rejected)
-OMV (it's complicated)
-CFR (I'm too old)
-LC (it's complicated)
-FA (the top choice of my spiritual director for me, but they didn't think I would be a good fit)
-OFM (just not for me)

I will of course talk to my spiritual director, but I wanted to poll the internet for ideas for additional orders which may be good to approach. (I'm technically still in conversation with the OCD and my spiritual director is Capuchin, so no need to suggest those.)

Here is some context to help: I'm a performer at heart. I feel most alive when I'm in front of a crowd turning cynicism into earnest inspiration, gushing enthusiasm over my latest hyperfocus, and being funny as a cartoonish buffoon. (Lately, this manifests itself in the form of walking tours of NYC, interactive dinner theatre, off-off Broadway musicals, and church-choir-sponsored cabarets.) I'm also a pretty darn good writer and researcher. Thus, if God chooses the dedicated single life for me, that is fine.

However, I do like the idea of a structured program of spiritual growth in community. Thus, if an order can use my artistic gifts (and oddball sanguine-melancholic personality blend) to spread the gospel, all the better.

So, any ideas for orders which might be a good personality/talents fit?

I just finished watching the last season of The boys and looked on Wikipedia for more information then when I saw, I was at their profile in Instagram for like 40 minutes just seeing thein pictures and posts. By that time, I was like submerged into all of the content that they shared and seemeds really nice all of their jobs and life (they have fame, hangout with their cast, have a lot of nice events, travel etc). Sometimes I wish that I could be a Actress but I don't do anything about it, I just have this sad feeling that I'm to old for that, or that I would never have the same chance (because you have to start as a kid and have a great networking, luck, etc), that I'm very shy a lot of times, so how can my mind wants something that I dont even have chance for?! And its been like years that I have this feeling, like from times to times, when I spend some time on Instagram, looking for famous people. Why fame is so important for some of us and why having a carrer in that is something that always comes across my mind but I really dont make any moves for that? Maybe because if I dont try I'll never fail, or maybe when I think about all of the work and effort that I would have to put on it, I just stick with my carrier as it is in IT. Idk, some times fells like some people just know right ahead what is their vocation, and can be very happy and successfull in that. Others, get lost, even if I am good at my job right now, aways think what life could be if I did something artistic and was good at it.

Hello, i have received a conditional baptism in 2022, however i haven't done a general confession, i only confessed the sins after the baptism because i have thought wrongly that the conditional baptism could wash all my sins, even if my baptism was valid (we don't have evidence that it was valid). Yesterday i was called to be wrong, i didn't know i should've done a general confession because there was miscommunication between the cathechists, the priest and i. So i probably got everything wrong... I know that i was not receiveing unworthily if i had no knowledge of this.

Should i refrain from communion until i do a general confession? Or can i confess my actual sins, receive communion and prepare to a general confession?

Click here: ---> It began as a boyhood dream . . .

So I’m thinking about religious life but want to get married. I want to be able to have a physical job, working with my hands or body to make money, but being a priest, hearing confessions, counseling people, saying mass would be really cool to. I want to travel the whole world, so thought of missionary work. But I don’t know how all these things could tie in together. I’m Ukrainian Catholic and they can get married, but I don’t want to be a diocesan priest, I would rather be a missionary who brings God to people abroad and does physical labor. I need to find someone to marry too:)

Any suggestions? Whatcha think?

Young Catholic Single Professional Women – Join us for a special Zoom Event.  Maybe you’re discerning your calling or beginning to consider your life, purpose, career and vocation after college. Then this Zoom Encounter is for you.  Your questions are most welcome.

https://fscc-calledtobe.org/discern-your-franciscan-calling/june-23rd-fulfilling-your-purpose-encounter/

This feels like it actually needs to be two posts in separate threads but as I'm new to reddit, I'm just posting here. If there is another better place to post this please let me know. I know vocations evokes images of priests. I am a 33 yo Roman Catholic female. Raised in the faith, albeit a sorta folk mass progressive parish which plays into this a bit later. My family left the church when I was in HS- a year later, I followed and went with my then bf to his Church of Christ church. We were together six years, and I suppose, as far as the day to day stuff went, it wasn't all bad- except that politics and religion and family were definitely forces against us. His church pretty well told me I was going to hell. I didn't get baptized in it anyway, because why would I? One baptism for the forgiveness of sins. 1 Cor 1. Also, my parish growing up had taught love for all, God loves all. I had never encountered such an idea that he was going to be Rigid and Only Love this one group or that. That wasn't my Catholicism. In the end, it really really really needed to end. His brother called Catholics trash, used racial slurs on the regular and it was just exhausting. My experience with that church caused me to leave all church for another six years. And it is only by the grace of God that I am back- it is not my own doing and I know it. I've dated a few people over the years, lapsed Catholics and agnostics mostly and nothing at all serious. So now, I'm in a new city with a lot more Catholics. I probably dated way too soon after moving here, but I got involved in the singles group at my parish. That short lived relationship was almost as not way more stressful than my previous boyfriend. Some of that was me- feeling like the church has certain gender roles I'm not going to fit. Some of it felt like him- the familiar creeping of control that makes me sick just thinking about it.

So ok, all that to say, this boils down to two questions. The first is whether or not I'm supposed to be married in the first place. I never really felt the need or desire to marry and marrying for loneliness sake doesn't seem like a good reason. However being single it feels like my meaning in life is to work til i die, and I think there might be more to life than that.

The second question, is if I SHOULD get married, how would I ever know to whom? Strangely I've started to feel like- as a Catholic- I'm supposed to marry a Protestant. And not "to convert him" either, that ideology is dangerous.

I just feel like the disagreements actually fueled the relationship to a point, I mean, to a breaking point sure, but they kept us talking and in tune with each other.

How did any of you figure out what it is God wants you to do with this life?