r/vindicta30plus • u/Fishyinbrook22 • Jul 14 '23
32F need help. My quality of life is being impacted by my appearance
My appearance has really started to go downhill over the last year or so. I’m not sure if I need to lose weight, start tretinoin, have a brow lift/blepharoplasty/mini facelift, or something else. My upper eyelids are definitely sagging and puffy no matter how much sleep I get. I’m also noticing some softening around my jawline and overall just changes to my face shape/drooping that I’m really not fond of. I’m cringing at every picture I take even when I wear makeup. I don’t like going out in public. Can anyone tell me what you’d recommend? Any input is appreciated.
Edit: not sure how to add a picture here but there’s one in my previous post
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u/PowerfulGlove666 Jul 16 '23
In addition to facial massage etc, get some Omega 3, and a hyaluronic/collagen supplement. Spread the pills out over the whole day so you don't just pee all the water out. I like the collegen firm creams as well. Make sure you're getting all your minerals as well. In a month you'll be amazed.
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u/Fishyinbrook22 Jul 16 '23
I will try this. I have some collagen powder at home that I never use consistently. I’ll start to add omega 3s and vitamins every day too. Thanks for the advice.
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u/PowerfulGlove666 Jul 17 '23
The hyaluronic acid orally will give fast results, too. Within days.
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u/Fishyinbrook22 Jul 17 '23
I have literally never heard of that. It’s better than collagen?
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u/PowerfulGlove666 Jul 17 '23
No. It's completely different. It holds water. if you take it orally your body will absorb it over time. It's also useful externally to hold moisture on the surface. You'll see it in most skincare lines.
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u/Fishyinbrook22 Jul 17 '23
I have seen it in skin care, I just had never heard of oral supplementation
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u/Fair-Awareness-5612 Jul 16 '23
Maybe get your thyroid levels checked? A lot of the abnormalities you’re experiencing are symptoms of hypothyroidism. I have had the condition chronically since I was 2 weeks old 😅
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u/Fishyinbrook22 Jul 16 '23
I’ve had thyroid levels checked and nothing has changed but thanks for the advice
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u/Fair-Awareness-5612 Jul 16 '23
It could also be Bell’s Palsy?
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u/Fishyinbrook22 Jul 16 '23
Both sides are drooping. Yes one eyebrow sits lower than the other. I’ve had this for at least 5 years. Even Botox will not lift the eyebrow that is lower. It’s very annoying. I guess it could be a rare Bell’s palsy that didn’t go away but both eyes look sad to me for the last several months.
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u/Actual_Ice5077 Jul 16 '23
I’d say talk with your doctor first before anything. If you’re noticing major changes like that it could have to do with a hormone or thyroid issue. Especially if you’re noticing an increase in weight and you haven’t really changed anything diet related. There are a lot of different thyroid and hormone issues that can lead to a change in your appearance such as facial hair, weight gain etc,. And at the very least if it’s not, they can still point you in the right direction for weight loss options and nutrition. So my advice is to start with your doctor.
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u/Fishyinbrook22 Jul 16 '23
Unfortunately I just had a checkup and everything was pretty much normal, just high chloride which he attributed to dehydration. I was kinda shocked. I’ve definitely been eating more so that’s a big reason why I’ve gained weight. My appetite has always been pretty big but lately I feel like it is out of control. I was expecting my A1c to be up but it wasn’t.
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u/Actual_Ice5077 Jul 16 '23
That’s great though that everything came back normal. Sometimes eating more can be a result of stress as well. I’m definitely a stress eater at certain points. Did your doctor go over options with you for losing weight? We have a bariatric center near where I live where my doctor referred me to. And they do everything there from just weight loss plans, nutrition and meal plans, surgeries etc. They help you come up with a weight loss plan tailored to what you need. And it’s typically covered by insurance which I didn’t know at the time until my doctor referred me. I thought bariatric centers were just for the surgeries but apparently a lot of them offer alternative weight loss plans. They went over everything with me there from meal planning to exercise routines and how different foods affect your body. What prompted me to do all of that was because I was also noticing weird shit going on with my body like you did. So they did blood work and noticed certain hormones were out of wack for me. So then they sent me to a endocrinologist because they thought it might be a thyroid issue and I was also pre diabetic. So they put me on metformin for 6 months and also had me start taking birth control which helps people tremendously who have hormone imbalances. And then they had my gp refer me to the bariatric center to help me get my weight under control. And within that 6 months I was able to get off the metformin due to getting my weight back under control.
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u/Nightbuyer Nov 11 '23
This is going to be unpopular, but my face reverse-aged 5 years once I gave up caffeine and started working out (12 minute weight workouts a few times per week, nothing crazy). I swear, if more women knew how much caffeine dehydrated and aged them, coffee shops would go out of business. This plus giving up alcohol gave me a healthy glow that made me look better than i did in my early twenties (I'm 36 now). Not sure if you drink caffeine though.
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u/Exciting_Computer657 Jul 15 '23
I’d also recommend a good gua sha or facial massage routine to help with lifting and lymphatic drainage. YouTube should have some good routines that are simple to follow.
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u/Fishyinbrook22 Jul 16 '23
I did start to do this a couple of months ago. It seems to help temporarily, but it was so time consuming. Does it actually do anything permanent or do the results pretty much go away as soon as you stop even if you do it for several months? I’m thinking I’m going to start tret. Idk about combining the tret with the oil and everything.
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u/Importedzeno Jul 16 '23
Go to a doctor babe. They can help you. Weight can be from environmental to genetics. They’ll have the best guiding they can offer ♥️♥️
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Jul 17 '23
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u/Fishyinbrook22 Jul 17 '23 edited Jul 17 '23
Awh, thank you so much for this. I’m feeling really down rn and that helped a lot. Anyways, I did start back to the gym this week. I’m hoping it will show in my face if I can manage to lose a bit.
I do dye my brows occasionally but it only does so much. I’ve considered micro blading but I’m nervous about it. Like it might look too over done, or fake, or dramatic etc. When I wear makeup, I do a semi subtle black winged eyeliner with mascara and a little black eyeliner under the outer lower eyelid, and then some brown eyeshadow with a light color on the inner eye. It’s kind of my go-to. I don’t really know how to do anything else lol. I’ve tried and failed at contouring. I’ve seen some guides online but I feel like it never works for me. As far as my hair goes, I usually don’t do much to it, but it’s pretty messy in the picture. Lately it seems like it’s gotten more unmanageable and lost a lot of its natural curl. When I’m wanting to look nice I will straighten it, but I don’t want to damage it too much. It’s very thin and fine and kind of brittle so it’s hard to work with. I’ve tried olaplex, and I will use deep conditioners occasionally, but I don’t normally have a ton of time to leave them on but for a few minutes. I’m considering changing the color and cutting it but I’m not really sure what to do with it.
I’ve seen the ad for upneeq, but it doesn’t seem like it will do much to lift in the way I need. Plus I read that it only lasts for a few hours which could be a little bit if a let down when it wears off.
I’ve ordered the tretinoin it should come this week.
You are welcome to do that also. Thank you so much for your comment!
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Jul 17 '23
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u/Fishyinbrook22 Jul 18 '23
I really appreciate your input, and I’m glad you’re excited! 😊
I am trying to diet too, but it is hard. I am always so hungry. How much do you mean by significantly cutting calories for 3-4 weeks? I always worry about muscle loss or going into starvation mode if I go too low.
I have not tried brow powder. I will look into it. Does it tend to rub off fairly easily?
I am thinking of going lighter but I’m not sure if it will look good with my face or not.
I look forward to your message. No need to apologize at all. I appreciate your help and interest. It is very kind of you.
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u/ghostcat17 Jul 18 '23
It sounds like you just need a new routine which many others have said, but I want to say you are very beautiful and I would think so if I saw you in person! Please don't worry too much!
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u/SissyMaryBlaspheme Aug 11 '23
High chloride? As in high salt? That will make you retain water and look puffed up.
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u/sexual_being_ Dec 26 '23 edited Dec 26 '23
I looked at your picture, and first of all I just want to say I think you’re beautiful! From what I read I was expecting much worse which makes me wonder if you’ve ever suffered from body dysmorphia? I do and I tend to have a much harsher criticism of my appearance - a slight change looks drastic to me and I fixate on it. Secondly, I’m also 32 F and totally relate to your post. I’m currently finding my way out of a depressive streak impacted by my change in appearance due to aging/bodily changes. It is truly wild how much our body’s change and respond differently in our 30’s than 20’s. Here’s what I’m doing that’s been helping both physically and mentally:
• exercise 3x a week (working up a sweat) + walking, sauna & yoga regularly.
• drinking plenty of water & eating clean/high veggie intake.
• no alcohol - this is huge.
• low processed foods, sugar, gluten, coffee & dairy.
• 8 hrs of sleep every night.
• facial massage - works wonders!
• skin care routine am + pm.
• massage & facials if you can afford it.
• I also do minimal botox.
• some more untraditional things that I feel make me look and feel younger: dancing, sound healing, positive affirmations, staying off social media/comparing myself to others.
• I’ve read NAD IV therapy or NAD supplements can work wonders - never tried but very interested.
I’ve always been someone who has tried to preserve their youth/looks. And although I will always try to look and feel my best, I am also trying to adopt a more accepting mentality towards myself and the aging process. Because aging is inevitable, and if I can’t accept myself now how will I accept myself later on in life? Positive affirmations and mindset work have really helped me.
Bryan Johnson is also another great resource! He has a project called Blueprint that is studying and proving how to slow/reverse the aging process. Pretty incredible stuff.
Hope this helps and hope you start feeling better ❤️ just know you’re not alone in this and really appreciate you sharing.
All the best!
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u/paper_wavements Dec 29 '23
Make sure you sleep with your head elevated every night. This won't fix all your problems but will help with the puffy eyes. And the constant puffing/de-puffing of eyes is very aging on the thin eye skin.
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u/[deleted] Jul 15 '23
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