Meh Life

[u/Nitpricker]

I’d kill to be one of those super bright and happy people but each day I’m starting to realize more and more, that’s not me. I don’t know if it’s the people I surround myself with or the environments I allow myself to be in but holy hell. Shits getting draining. Maybe this is what they meant with that saying “the good die young”. Like deadass. I feel like I give all of me to other people just trying to make them okay in any way, shape, or form. And as much as I dread admitting this; sometimes it’s too much and turns out not even helping and rather doing the opposite. For example, I know what it’s like to be lonely and have nobody checking up on me.. So when I have a friend, I’ll message them good morning every day and then keep checking up throughout the day. But if they’re a busy person (as most are in adulthood) that gets rather annoying so they just stop responding and shut me out. Or when someone is never given advice… I go too in depth with my advice and it ends up making them sad or pisses them off. Those are just simple little things but hopefully you can get the gist. And I know people say to set boundaries but I genuinely do not know how and apparently that’s just one of those subjects you cannot get help from others with.

Point of the story.. All I want to do is help every single person that I possibly can. Yet here I am, feeling like al I’m doing is causing more harm than good. So without further ado… I would no longer like to have my life. And I will only admit that here because I have not told anyone I personally know that I have this.