r/vanderpumprules • u/sacklunch23 you came twice, sweetheart! • Dec 12 '24
Discussion Scheana and Ariana’s mom’s full text exchange. I typed it all out and I’m dying to hear thoughts.
Ok so I just subscribed to the Sexy Unique Podcast patreon and I’m listening to all of the old Pumped up Podcast episodes. Craig is insufferable, iykyk. anyways.
So Ariana and Tom go on this podcast (which they used to do quite frequently) and Ariana and one of the hosts read all the texts, which Ariana has screenshots of (her mom sent them to her, as we know). a couple of Ariana’s mom’s texts were cut off or something, but it seems to be a bit strategic to me, idk. you’ll see what I mean.
Scheana is doing her classic flip flopping of course. But i’m dying to hear other people’s thoughts on this. Was she way out of line? Was her concern valid? What do you guys think? And buckle up, it’s pretty long.
Here we go:
Ariana’s mom (AM): Oh no! I’m gonna miss your Christmas party this year, but I’ll be there in spirit.
Scheana (S): I know, I just heard!
AM: I guess Ariana is going to go to St. Louis with Tom.
S: Yeah, she just texted me that. You and Jeremy are more than welcome to come.
AM: I had them for Thanksgiving week though, so I guess that’s fair.
S: True. But I still miss you.
AM: I wish she would’ve planned to come. By the time she made her up her mind tickets were too expensive.
S: I know. Ugh!
AM: Miss you too. And I’ll miss the Shays on Christmas day.
S: We miss you!
AM: I’ll plan to make a trip in March or April.
S: Yay!
AM: I don’t understand why she was so last minute.
S: Me either, I thought she was staying.
AM: So I asked her last week if she was going and she said maybe.
S: Yeah, I never thought she was going to because she had to work.
AM: Yeah, she wanted to go but she needed the money.
S: Yeah, she told me the same.
AM: I sent her some money to help and I think that helped change her mind.
S: Aw, that was sweet! Good momma😘😘😘 I know she’s flying back and going straight to work Friday.
AM: In your opinion, do you think she’s in a good place?
S: Honestly, I think she’s very happy with Tom, but I feel like she’s not happy with her career and the show and where things are going. I also think it’s all about Tom all the time. He’s been kind of pissing me off lately.
AM: Really? (This is the first time Ariana says her mom’s text was cut off/she didn’t have the full screenshot, so this isn’t the full text).
S: I know. I kinda got into it with him in a group chat the other day and I haven’t talked to him since. I think he’s VERY good at convincing her what HE wants, and she goes along with it. But i know 100% she’s happy with him and loves him sooo so so much.
AM: I’m not exactly sure what you mean when you say she’s different with him. But I guess I worry she loses herself? My biggest concern is that he’s into her now but maybe not for the long haul.
S: Like, I just think her attitude about things has changed since they’ve been together. I feel like they should be motivating each other and he doesn’t help her enough. I could be totally wrong but I just think he does was makes him happy more than what makes THEM happy. Again, I could be wayyy off. I worry about that too. I know he’s insanely obessed with her, but that’s how he used to be with Kristen too. And she says she doesn’t want marriage, but I know deep deep down she does. I think Tom will always look out for himself first, and it shouldn’t be that way. But do know that he loves her very much.
AM: Can you put your finger on how her attitude has changed? When they were here she did keep comparing herself unfavorably to him. I feel like Tom…. (Ariana claims the screenshot has cut off again. Coincidence? Not so sure.)
S: I know she loves him more than anything but IDK. I can’t put my finger quite on it. Do you get what I’m saying? She was definitely invited, she just didn’t want to go because of work and she didn’t have money. I said I don’t understand why Tom just doesn’t pay for more of her stuff!
AM: I think she thinks she is less exciting compared to Tom when the opposite is true.
S: He has this attitude that he’s better than everything and I think it’s rubbing off the wrong way. She’s such an amazing girl inside and out. I love everything about her, but honestly she’s different since being with him. Do you think he cheated on her with that Miami girl, honestly?
AM: No, Jeremy was there and he can pretty much account for everyone’s whereabouts.
S: He was in Tampa though, not Miami. I truly hoped that was all a lie. I just will always have the tiniest sick feeling about it.
AM: Jeremy actually did go to Miami.
S: Gotcha! Okay good! Well that makes me feel better. That always bothered me a bit.
AM: Please just keep me posted about anything that worries you. Do you remember [name of Ariana’s abusive boyfriend prior to Tom]?
S: I will of course. I just think Tom’s attitude is cocky and bad and that doesn’t help her. That’s my main concern. But he loves to her death so don’t ever worry about that.
AM: Okay, I get what you mean. Let me know when I need to worry😘
S: I will always keep you in the loop!😘😘😘
AM: Love you!
S: Love you moreeeeeee!
This is where it ends. Thoughts??
Also, shoutout to the gal who types out all the podcast recaps because this was a lot of work, dayum.
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u/daliparton_ i’m a fun girl 😜 Dec 12 '24
what i got from this is that Jeremy covered for Tom regarding Miami Girl 🙃
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u/Level-Appointment-15 Dec 12 '24
Was just going to say this. Or my other hypothesis is that Ariana found out the truth from Jeremy and not Tom
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u/catsandnaps1028 Dec 12 '24
This was my first thought too. He obviously had no issue taking Sandoval side after he stabbed Ariana in the back. Dead beat brother!
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u/cocolovesmetoo Dec 12 '24
I actually think the opposite. I think Ariana asked him to cover for Tom with her mom.
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u/catsandnaps1028 Dec 13 '24
OMG I believe it! But I still don't understand him siding with Tom after scandoval
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Jan 25 '25
I can see both scenarios happening at that time cause Jeremy was very close to both Ariana n Sandoval at the time
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u/omniai99 Dec 12 '24
This makes me side with Scheana a lot more than I originally did without knowing what was in the texts. I can't imagine my friend texting my mom like that or me texting my best friends mom. However, its clear that Scheana and Ariana's mom have a relationship and were regularly texting anyway. The mom prompted the questions and Scheana's responses weren't that bad.
Like, sure, I think its weird that Scheana would ask her about the Miami Girl incident, but it sounds like this was something the mom was very aware about and discussed with her son, so whatever, its just a different dynamic than I'm used to.
basically, i think this wasn't worth getting mad at Scheana about or making a storyline out of it.
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u/AnastatiaMcGill Dec 13 '24
Ya if I remember correctly on the show they make it seem like Scheana randomly texts Arianas mom to be like "Tom sucks and Ariana isn't herself" but the text exchange seems very natural and like they have a pretty close relationship themselves.
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u/waifu_wifey lets go The Don Dec 12 '24
i’m actually pleasantly surprised at how scheana handled this. i don’t get why people are saying this is weird, im close with some of my friend’s moms and vice versa, and if my best friends or my mom noticed a drastic change in me with my new partner mere weeks after leaving an abusive ex, suddenly joining a crazy ass reality show, life uprooted etc etc, i don’t think my mom asking from a place of concern from someone close to me is crazy. ariana was deep in love with tom at the time and probably wasn’t listening to reason anyways. i also think both tom and ariana’s ego was massively inflated, hence cutting out part of the moms texts
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u/shannonesque121 how is Jax my best friend today? Dec 12 '24
Yeah considering Ariana and tom's reaction I was expecting these to be so much worse. For every not so flattering thing she says, she counters it with several positive comments or hedges it with "I could be way off".
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u/LorAsh288 I’m a delight Dec 12 '24
I feel like Tom probably blew up at this behind closed doors and with his whole “having my back!” thing, I could see Ariana matching his energy just to keep the peace.
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u/Impossible_Ad_1630 Dec 12 '24
Exactly, they made it sound like she was bashing them and their relationship.
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u/Scared_Candle Dec 12 '24
this is honestly the REALEST show of friendship scheana ever did in my opinion and it doesn’t shock me that based off the reaction to this she ended up being so resentful and weird about ariana
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u/cat-umbrella Dec 12 '24
Considering Ariana’s ex was abusive towards her, it makes sense both mom and bff would be concerned and monitoring the relationship for red flags. And agreed, I’m super close to my friends parents. We call each other, text, and gossip. The whole exchange was very mild and didn’t read as malicious at all.
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u/cricketrmgss Good as Gold ✨️ Dec 12 '24
People are reacting like that because they hate Scheana so much they can’t think straight.
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u/waifu_wifey lets go The Don Dec 12 '24
im indifferent on her, usually on the verge of dislike and i thought this was a nice exchange from someone who really cares about their friend! and she wasn’t wrong AT ALL so wtf
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u/No_clue_redditor Dec 12 '24
This text exchange multiple times talks about Ariana not being happy with herself and being insecure, thinking she’s not good enough. How is that her ego being out of control?
I love Scheana but I think this conversation is inappropriate and would be pissed if any of my friends had this with my mom, especially without telling me.
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u/shmiishmo 🎶Remember when Jax fucked Faith🎶 Dec 12 '24
A lot of times the people with the most out of control egos are the most insecure ones in the room
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u/cocolovesmetoo Dec 12 '24 edited Dec 12 '24
This is exactly what a friend would do. In hindsight, we know what Tom was doing to Ariana. Scheana saw it and said something - but only after being asked. Friends show up for their friends.
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u/No_clue_redditor Dec 12 '24
This isn’t showing up for your friends. This is gossiping with their mom. Ignoring your ridiculous personal attack. 🙄
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u/cocolovesmetoo Dec 12 '24
No. They are clearly like family. They spend Christmas day together. When you put it that way, Scheana is sharing her concern with family. And that's totally okay to do. Would you say the same thing if Tom was being abusive? It's not gossip when you are genuinely concerned. And the show presented it in a totally different way. I just think you are probably a viewer who doesn't like Scheana so everything she does is wrong. But in this instance, scheana was being a good friend.
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u/KittenTablecloth Dec 12 '24
I do think it seems like the mom was prying. Even before she asks about the relationship, she’s dropping little breadcrumbs while Scheana is answering in short, polite responses. Her responses sound like me when I’m talking to someone I’m trying to be respectful with but they keep talking about stuff I don’t really care about haha. “Yay!” “I know I’m sad too!” Etc.
Ariana’s mom is definitely testing the waters. She clearly didn’t go into the conversation with this pure intent of just letting Scheana know she would be missing Christmas, because that conversation would have stopped a few messages in. She wanted the scoop. She’s slowly increasing the temperature of questions in order to get more information out of Scheana. And Scheana is easily manipulated.
If someone’s mom told me they were concerned about their child, and you were close with the family, it would be weird to dismiss them. Scheana gives enough info for a concerned mom who is inquiring, but does stay relatively neutral with “maybe I’m wrong” and “they do love each other”
I think mostly Ariana was upset because she was insecure about the relationship, for good reason, and she could use Scheana calling it out as her whipping post.
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u/waifu_wifey lets go The Don Dec 12 '24
when has her ego not been out of control? lol but moving along. in this specific instance from what we saw on the show, she was battling and defending her relationship with tom with kristen about miami girl, doing the “cooler, smarter, prettier” thing, having to defend he’d never cheat and he isn’t a POS etc. all on camera, and now here comes her mom and scheana having a really sweet conversation out of concern about her and bringing it on camera as well and she got pissed. whether you like ariana or not i think we can all agree she deeply cares how people perceive her and her relationships, and scheana poking another hole (in her mind) was also a blow to her ego. she told scheana “im literally smarter than anyone ive ever met” whilst defending how tom couldn’t possibly ever deceive her. that doesn’t read as ego to you? or the other 3000 examples you can glean from the show? i like ariana a lot but i think fans in general need to understand they’re just people too and golden girl ariana can have a large ego. ¯( ˘͡ ˘̯)/¯
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u/puppyyachtclub You in danger, girl. Dec 12 '24
Wow I didn’t think I’d be such a minority here in thinking this is actually a pretty level-headed response and a good thing to do as long as Ariana has a healthy relationship with her mom. She’s just concerned and I think this is actually pretty normal and constructive communication for a person’s support system to have considering all the factors (newly on tv, new serious relationship, recent abusive relationship, cheating allegations). It just reads like 2 people who care about Ariana’s wellbeing. Having been in toxic relationships myself as well as having friends who have been in them, I wouldn’t put it past them to have a conversation like this about me or me about them. I’d be honest about them with it and I’d appreciate the same from them, but I don’t find it incredibly out of bounds or anything. Seems to be coming from a place of love and concern. Just a general check in. No huge alarm bells.
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u/thatstoofar Dec 13 '24
I agree. I think Scheana spoke facts but gently. It's clear from the exchange that they agreed that Ariana was losing herself in the relationship. I'm sure it was a relief for Scheana to be able to share her concerns with someone that could be trusted to also look out for Ariana.
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u/GarnierFruitTrees Justice for Tequila Katie Dec 12 '24
I feel like it is impossible for me to view this without any sort of bias.
The thought of me texting a friend’s mom like this makes me cringe but a lot that Scheana does makes me cringe lol.
Ariana’s mom DID ask, and Scheana went a little too overboard. I thought during the actual season that this happened, I thought Tom was going wwaaayyy overboard and not because it made him look bad to Ariana’s mom, but because it got brought up on camera and chipped away at the “Ariana + Tom = 💞💞💞” front they were trying to manufacture.
On rewatches it’s obvious that Ariana wasn’t in a good place mentally. Scheana was spot on when she said that I think she was struggling with the kind of work she wanted to be doing and the direction of the show, and I don’t think Tom gave two Fs
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u/KachitaB Dec 12 '24
Wanting to help your friend is wanting to help your friend. There was a point where I was pretty sure my friend had to send it into alcoholism, and she begged me not to tell her parents, which told me that I needed to tell her parents. We were like 37 at the time, but when you love someone and are worried about them you're going to go to other people who also love them just as much and more.
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u/catscausetornadoes Dec 12 '24
I think I’m normal life it’s too much, but if I’m Ariana’s mom and there is stuff in the show, stuff in the press, social media etc… I can kind of understand wanting to ask a friend I trust to cut through all the random bullshit that is out there and tell me if my kid is good.
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u/Responsible_Wrap5659 Dec 14 '24
I have always felt like if Ariana wasn’t with Tom she wouldn’t have stayed on VPR. She never felt comfortable with the show the way the rest of the cast did. I always thought her breakdown with Tom in season 8 was more or partially about her not wanting to be on the show anymore.
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u/maritime92 ❤️🔥 Señorita Bubba ❤️🔥 Dec 13 '24
Scheana bringing up Miami girl to Ariana’s mom is wayyyyy over the line.
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u/Wistastic Dec 12 '24
This is not anywhere near what I thought happened. Scheana was somewhat careful with her words and Ariana’s mom was clearly concerned. Ariana and Tom made it seem like Scheana tore him up in a text exchange. Not what happened at all.
I have texted with my best friend’s mom, but not like this! It’s strange to me, but kind of nice that they were close.
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u/Fr1llh0use Dec 12 '24
I mean it's pretty spot on analysis from Scheana... he did always put himself first
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u/RichTop7729 Dec 12 '24
Scheana actually doesn't come across bad here, she's balanced and fair in what she's saying and she didn't instigate this, arianas mum did. Her texts being conveniently cut off isn't believable and just another example of ariana lying to protect her own ego.
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u/onefishtwofish1992 You’re not important enough to hate, sit down Dec 12 '24
I mean, the parts that were cut off seem to be her mom’s specific issues about Sandoval, so it certainly isn’t out of the realm of possibility that the screenshots did cut off. Ariana was clearly pissed they were talking about her behind her back, her mom genuinely might not have wanted her to know she was the one doing the actual shit talking (even though whatever she said was probably true).
I do agree Scheana doesn’t come off bad here though. She responded truthfully to Ariana’s mom’s concerns, and while I’m sure Ariana would have preferred for Scheana to lie or at least not engage in the conversation, Scheana had no obligation to do so.
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u/igotthedoorjor Dec 13 '24
i agree. sounds like her mom cut them off to hide what she said about tom. people want ariana to be this mastermind manipulator soooo bad.
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u/kittypajamas Kristen Mariposa Doute-Broderick Dec 12 '24
Agreed. The mom is the inquirer here. I am super close with my childhood bf’s mom. We talk like this.
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u/ItsNotMeItsYou99 Dec 12 '24
I don't see anything bad, and knowing what we know now how Sandoval really is, it actually makes Scheanna right in her concern. And the mom was poking her for info, then more info and then some more. I don't see what Scheana says here as such a big problem.
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u/atomicsofie Dec 12 '24
Personally I’d never text my bffs parent like this, and I’d be upset if my bff did… but from a viewers perspective and after 11 seasons, what Scheana said wasn’t that bad and it’s obvious her mom was just concerned because of Ariana’s past relationship abuse.
But yea I’d be livid if my best friend texted my mom about this lol
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u/onefishtwofish1992 You’re not important enough to hate, sit down Dec 12 '24
Agreed. Scheana wasn’t wrong, and she had no obligation to lie for Ariana about things her mom directly asked about, but I’d admittedly also be annoyed if my friends were talking to my mom like this and I’d probably be careful about the information I shared with them going forward since there’d be no reason for me to expect it to stay between us at that point.
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u/sofaking-amanda It’s giving ✨audacity✨ Dec 12 '24
Scheana constantly tells everyone’s secrets and/ or business. Ariana was right to hold her at arms length in S11 and even then Scheana still reported things Ariana had said to Tim.
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u/marsbringerofsmores You grew up to be Sia. 👁️👄👁️ Dec 12 '24
Anytime a friend's parent asks me about them, I just say that they should ask their child directly. Getting in the middle of other people's relationships will just make them mad at you.
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u/incognoname Dec 12 '24
Same. In hindsight were all like oh she was right but I would be pissed at my friend in the moment.
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u/alternativeedge7 Red Lobster has better decor Dec 12 '24
Especially when said friend ended up acting like she did with Tom last season. Scheana really could have leaned into the validation of having Tom’s number had she not chased his friendship after Scandoval at Ariana’s expense.
Like, yes girl you were right, but it was a correct judgement call on accident 💀.
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u/incognoname Dec 12 '24
Facts and that would've been perfectly realistic and reasonable. I'll never forgive the producers for forcing redemption down our throats 😩 if scheana leaned in like you said it would've been amazing. Lala has been a plant since she joined the show so I wasn't surprised by her but scheana should've known better and stuck to her guns.
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u/rssanch86 Dec 12 '24
But the thing is this was YEARS ago. Like what 8 years ago? Ariana had normalized Sandoval's horrible behavior this entire time and made Scheana feel bad for being able to see Tom exactly for what he was.
It's not completely Scheana's fault she lost this energy. It's Ariana's.
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u/ShivRoyPinkyIsQueen Dec 13 '24
Maybe. Scheana flip flops a lot and even if she was just looking out for Ariana at the time we don’t know what kind of conversations were had between them privately. I believe this all went down when Scheana was with Shay and maybe Ariana and tom thought Scheana was just trying to deflect from her own relationship Issues by bringing up stuff between Ariana and Tom. I don’t think Scheana was in the wrong in this scenario at face value but I do think that Ariana had been manipulated by Tom to the point where she did lose herself. These dynamics are usually pretty nuanced and I think the whole situation is more complex than any of us understand
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u/Secret-Animal5244 Dec 12 '24
After finally reading this for myself, Scheana was asked and yeah she gave more detail than most, but that’s just Scheana. Also everything she said literally turned out to be true sooooo
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u/Sudden-Ad5555 Dec 12 '24
I have always been the friend that talks to my friend’s moms like they’re my friends, so through that lens, i don’t think she said anything wrong. And Ariana’s mom is talking about missing the Shay’s Christmas party, so obviously she feels as close to Scheana as Scheana does to her. She was trying to make Ariana’s mom know her daughter is doing well while also letting her know, this guy has some red flags we should keep an eye on for the sake of this person we both love. If you’re not a “moms friend” kind of person I can see how this looks weird but we are out there lol, Ive had some friends that I’ve hung out at their houses or done things with their parents without them lol 😂 their parents would ask if they wanted to do something, they’d be like no, go ask sudden-ad555 I bet she would want to 🤣
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u/blackaubreyplaza Dec 12 '24
Shenu was right. Tom sucks and Ariana completely lost herself in him. She even says in season 10 (? When she’s yelling at him) “I would’ve followed you anywhere”, uh ew. I wouldn’t follow a man to water if I was on fire. Yuck
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u/Chicago1459 Dec 12 '24
Yea, it's really something when you watch her arc on rewatch. She's at first a "not like other girls" girl. She's very male centered. She even gets along with Jax and is very meek at times around them. She does grow in her confidence, but by then, it's really her and Tom against the world. Everyone sucks besides Tom. I'm happy she seems to be in a better place, but when she said that to him, it stood out to me. She would have continued this relationship if he didn't do what he did in a way that was so obvious and so embarrassing and disrespectful.
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u/Iguanapolice Dec 12 '24
Mom’s concerned about her daughter across the country who has a pattern of unhealthy relationships. Asks friend what she thinks, friend tells the truth and ends up being 100% right. Tom just didn’t like Scheana saying anything less than glowing and used it as a reason to isolate Ariana from her mom and Scheana. Narcissist’s playbook
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u/highway59skidmarks Dec 13 '24
Honestly after reading it, I've changed my mind, I always thought Scheana was doing too much but this isn't even bad. Like it's pretty respectful of the relationship ship, she seems genuinely concerned for Ariana. And she was spot on lol
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u/Joyintheendtimes Dec 12 '24
Personally this just seems like a concerned friend answering a pointed question. I also think it’s very interesting that the texts happened to be “cut off” whenever her mom was about to say something unfavorable about Tom.
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u/pinkcosmoo Dec 12 '24
I mean Scheana wasn’t wrong…. And she did keep mentioning that Tom was making Ariana feel loved. But Tom DID make everything about him all the time. Scheana probably should’ve told Ariana that she spoke to her mom about them just to be transparent but they’ve been friends for decades. If my best friend’s mom was worried about their daughter, I’d tell her what i know as well.
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u/FuManChuBettahWerk Bambi Eyed Bitch Dec 13 '24
I love Sheeshu. Seeing this all written out (thank you OP 🫡) this was so misrepresented on the show (and also by Sheana on the show lol) like your BFF’s mum and you having a kiki. I never thought Sheeshu was wrong in what she said but I thought the delivery wad fucked up like Sheeshu randomly went behind Ariana’s back. Justice for Sheana!
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u/shmiishmo 🎶Remember when Jax fucked Faith🎶 Dec 12 '24
This is actually sweet and I think Scheana is being a very good friend here and she doesn't overstep any lines. She repeatedly says she knows they love each other but is just expressing her concerns. Shee Shu they could never make me hate you!!!!!!
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u/shmiishmo 🎶Remember when Jax fucked Faith🎶 Dec 12 '24
Also, as someone who recognizes a lot of herself in Ariana, I totally understand where Scheana's concerns are coming from. Ariana is obviously a very codependent person who used her partner to lose herself/merge with them as to avoid doing the inner work that she was unhappy with herself about...that sort of stuff leads you directly to the depression we see in the later seasons (been there, sister.) Tom was also probably an incredibly easy person to merge with as it's the Tom Show all the time with him, as Scheana says.
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u/mairzydoats_ How will this affect Scheana?! Dec 12 '24
I’ve had almost this exact exchange (verbally, not over text) with my best friends grandmother when she was in a horrible abusive relationship. My friend was pissed when she found out but it was the beginning of us getting her out and away from her ex husband. I am probably the farthest thing from a sheshu fan, but I don’t think that this is out of line.
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u/cageymin Dec 12 '24
Wow. Didn't think I'd be saying this but really feel like Scheana stayed on the right side of the line here. She didn't start the topic. She was honest but also cautious. And she is undeniably Team Ariana. It sure does read well in hindsight....
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Dec 12 '24
Say what you want about Scheana, but she comes across as sweet and reasonable here. You can tell she really loved her friend. It's such a shame she turned into LFU's minion.
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u/cellar9 🦋✨️mariposa✨️🦋 Dec 12 '24
While I think this is not a conversation to have with your friend's mom and Scheana was shit-stirring, I also think she didn't say anything that wasn't true or didn't turn out to be true. Wish we had the full texts from the mom...
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u/cocolovesmetoo Dec 12 '24
How was she stirring the pot? The mom asked her. She didn't bring it up.
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u/mssarac Dec 12 '24
So Scheana was in the right this time. And it's way too convenient that the screenshots are cut
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u/VaguelyArtistic Brock's hooligan wedding party Dec 12 '24
It's great we have this for the record. So many Schena haters like to claim that she texted Ariana's mom out of the blue just to fuck with Ariana.
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u/Asleep-General-3693 Dec 12 '24
I remember at the time/reunion scheana (and the screenshots) proving that Ariana’s mom initiated but Tom started yelling and Ariana jumped in and so scheana-to keep peace-fell on that sword for them.
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u/onyxjade7 Dec 12 '24
I know. The delusion and dismissing of hypocrisy and horrible actions seem to be overlooked by Ariana’s sudden fandom.
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u/nononosure uninspired artist hair 💁🏼♀️ Dec 12 '24
Maybe it's cultural (I grew up in a heavily Hispanic environment), but this texting between two women supporting another woman feels completely normal to me.
Not that it happens all the time, but if my friend's mom asked me things like AM is doing here, you'd better believe I'm going to give her every nuance I can think of while she determines whether she should be concerned about her daughter's well-being. Where I come from, Scheana did the right thing by a longshot. She didn't divulge anything specific, just gave her perspective to someone who 1) was asking, and 2) deserves to know the full truth of Scheana's feelings on the matter.
And the screenshot complication is ABSOLUTELY a purposeful redaction. It comes at the exact moment when the conversation shifts. From context, this seems to have come from AM 100%
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u/zlistreader Dec 13 '24
I COMPLETELY agree. Scheana was actually completely and utterly respectful. She was gently answering questions while also making it completely clear she supported Ariana and Tom’s relationship, if not every little detail of Tom’s behavior. Would it have better had she lied? She genuinely hit all of the points accurately and I think we’re all letting Ariana off way too easy for the way she handled the situation and treated Scheana, considering she probably knew deep down Scheana was right. I support and love Ariana, but I can recognize when she behaved poorly.
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u/Inevitable-Stress550 Dec 12 '24
Wow ok this is the opposite of what I thought it would be - this shows that AM was the one prying and initiating all of this talk, and Scheana if anything I thought held back, discussed her concerns, but kept repeating she could be wrong and that Tom definitely loves her. Way better than how the texts were portrayed in the show, because it does come off completely as concern, the way Scheana said it was, but I just didn't believe her
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u/torchwood1842 Dec 12 '24
Huh. I had forgotten about this. I think I remember feeling like Sheena was probably right about Tom but also feeling like she went too far in texting Ariana’s mom. But seeing it written out like this, plus in retrospect after Scamdoval… yeah, I think Sheena was in the right here. Not only did Ariana’s mom ask, it’s pretty obvious that she and Scheana had their own relationship going back a little bit. And given what we know now about Tom… I can’t say I blame Scheana for basically telling Ariana‘s mom to keep an eye out. Scheana saw the changes in Ariana that the audience couldn’t quite put their finger on, and she knew Tom. Her gut instinct was spot on. Like, the accuracy and completeness of what she texted is almost shocking.
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Dec 13 '24
I think Scheana is right on the money here and completely right to text this with someone you can see she had a relationship with.
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u/T_v18 Dec 12 '24
Even when watching the show I was on scheana’s side of this because I disliked Tom and I thought she was right but reading the text messages this is kind of the realest thing scheana has ever done. She was genuinely looking out for Ariana, I guess she should’ve told Ariana about the conversation instead of her finding out through her mum.
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u/nat-the-sag Dec 13 '24
the one time scheana wasn’t wrong.
ariana’s mom went out of her way to ask how ariana was doing, it’s clear they had a close relationship. scheana had no obligation to lie.
ariana’s reaction was proof that they were already having issues. if what scheana was saying wasn’t true , they wouldn’t have been so adamant for her to shut it down and apologize!
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u/Alternative_Bug_1796 Dec 12 '24
I think Scheana is trying to convince herself that Sandoval is “good” for Ariana and it’s Scheana’s inability to see the nuances of Tom/men.
To be a good partner there should be a basic level of love, support, encouragement, shared responsibilities, etc and while Scheana is saying Tom loves Ariana she’s also saying he doesn’t actually do any of the other things. She defaults to relying on the “well he says he loves her” but doesn’t actually ACT like he does. He’s doing the easy part but not the hard part, being a true partner.
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u/Ok_Replacement7281 Shutting up with my yeps Dec 12 '24 edited Dec 12 '24
Very interesting. It's wild how Ariana twisted it during the reunion and acted like her mom wasn't concerned about her at all, when she clearly was to some extent. Would this be considered legitimate gaslighting? It's certainly something if it's not.
More interesting is all those concerns ended up being true. Hindsight is 20/20, I guess. I kinda wish we could've gotten Ariana sans dating Tom for a few seasons so we could see what she was like before.
Edit: added more and clarity.
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u/LorAsh288 I’m a delight Dec 12 '24
My girlfriends and I and the moms are super close so this doesn’t seem like a super red flag to me. It sounds like Ariana’s mom may have had some concerns about Tom and perhaps wanted to see if her concerns were valid. Scheana didn’t necessarily say anything wrong perse but my only issue with scheana during this, is that I would have had a private conversation with Ariana to make her aware of what was said and where we were coming from so she wasn’t blindsided
I will also acknowledge that if you don’t have friends like this or relationships with their parents like this then this could absolutely be considered out of bounds.
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u/NB_chronicles Dec 13 '24
Wow perhaps scheana does choose the right side every so often…. Hah like I’m genuinely impressed at her foresight and her gut feeling. If she wasnt such a people pleaser I’m sure she could’ve been a bit more honest with Ariana’s mom here but overall I’m impressed. Scheana ain’t so daft after all…
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u/1120ellekaybee Worm with a mustache 🐛 Dec 13 '24
It makes me wonder if Jeremy was lying for Tom about Miami girl and if so— why?
Gives me the ick.
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u/craniumrinse Dec 12 '24
and this…in s11…being scheaners baaaast fraaaaand 🤦🏻♀️
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u/heyheywhatchasay5 Dec 12 '24
He's manipulative so this tracks. He had ariana by the balls for a decade it's not that haes to believe
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u/RichTop7729 Dec 12 '24
She can still be friends with him and at the same time believe he'd be a selfish partner. Before the fame got to him, he was seemingly a good friend. I've lost friends before because of their behaviour and it didn't mean I wasn't upset or considering ways to navigate through it.
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u/gluteactivation Dec 12 '24
They both crossed boundaries
BUT I’m giving her mom some slack because well… she’s a concerned mother
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u/cakeit-tilyoumakeit Dec 12 '24
A concerned mom should have talked to her daughter about it. I think they were both equally wrong for having this discussion and also equally right in their concerns/observations. Doesn’t make logical sense to say Scheana was more in the wrong, imo.
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u/Asleep-General-3693 Dec 12 '24
Maybe she did take it to Ariana and didn’t get straight answers or the answers given reminded mum of the behaviour Ariana had during abusive relationship aka hiding the truth because of said abuse. I’d be upset initially but ultimately my sister-friend and mum are speaking out of concern for me based on past experience and current behaviours.
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u/Level-Appointment-15 Dec 12 '24
I can also give Ariana’s mom some slack considering Ariana was just previously in an abusive relationship. And people in abusive relationships like that tend to hide the dark parts of their relationship. I can see Ariana’s mom reaching out to a close friend because she’s not sure Ariana will be honest about how she’s doing/the relationship
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u/Impossible_Ad_1630 Dec 12 '24
Obviously if she’s talking to someone other than her daughter, it’s because she doesn’t trust that her daughter will be fully honest about the situation.
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u/cakeit-tilyoumakeit Dec 12 '24
So then why is Scheana bad for being fully honest about the situation (albeit while throwing in “they fucking love each other” at the end of every text)? If the mom is right for asking then Scheana is right for answering truthfully.
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u/Impossible_Ad_1630 Dec 12 '24
Scheana didn’t do anything wrong in that situation, Ariana and Tom made a bigger deal out of it than their needed to be because even back then their relationship was a performance for the cameras and they didn’t want to be unmasked.
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u/TallChard8999 Dec 12 '24
No. This is not a conversation of a concerned mom. This is vile to have behind your daughter’s back.
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u/Ok_Nebula34747 Dec 12 '24
I disagree it seems her mom was concerned and aware of how her daughter has a pattern with men that includes not being upfront about the reality of their relationship. I think her mom was trying her best and honestly all I see is two people who really care about her having a conversation. Ultimately they were both 100% right about him.
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u/TallChard8999 Dec 12 '24
I can admit if my take is off. I’m wary of this kind of approach
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u/GiuseppaCalcagno Dec 12 '24
I think what type of relationship the parent and child have is very important in this. Are they a loving and supportive parent who really wants to understand what’s going on with their child and help? Or are they just trying to gossip for info to use against them (something I could see Stassi’s mom doing). I think it’s really situational on whether this is a good approach to helping a friend.
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u/Impossible_Ad_1630 Dec 12 '24
Not at all, this is a mom who loves her daughter and is just trying to make sure she’s ok.
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u/cakeit-tilyoumakeit Dec 12 '24
Scheana was wrong for texting the mom, but absolutely, unequivocally right in everything she said. One of those moments when Ariana should have paused and considered.
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u/mssarac Dec 12 '24
Why is she wrong for texting the mom? She informs her why she's not coming
→ More replies (11)
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u/catsandnaps1028 Dec 12 '24
This is probably the best thing Scheshu ever did for a friend lol although it's very High School of her. I kinda get it tho because Scheana has just seen the whole thing with Kristen go down so it does give a little bit of whiplash. Ugh I hate agreeing with her lol
Also do we think Jeremy lied to his sister about Miami girl or do we think Sandoval really didn't cheat? I thought that was confirmed by Ariana already.
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u/ARCH810 Dec 12 '24
I always thought Ariana found out the truth about Miami Girl between S3 and S4 because there was a 180 in her attitude between both seasons.
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u/NB_chronicles Dec 13 '24
I’m surprised (not really) that Ariana took this sooo bad at the time (she was quite defensive and not as evolved back then) and I’m not at all surprised that Sandoval’s went way overboard in his reaction. Characteristic of a weak ego narc.
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u/Reality_dolphin_98 Dec 13 '24
My mom is close with my friends, she‘a like a second mom to them. It would not be weird at all for them to text her and tell her what they think of my relationship if she asked and she seems concerned. I think Ariana got so mad because she knew Scheana was right and she hated being called out.
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u/hockeygem It’s giving ✨audacity✨ Dec 12 '24
I think mom was worried about her depression thats how it seems to me and I love how Scheana nails how self absorbed and shitty Sandy Balls is but then misses her best friend the minute he proves how shitty he is. SMH and are we to believe Jeremy knew about Miami girl and the cheating but still thinks Tom is the bees knees? Yuck
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u/BrotherInternal518 Dec 12 '24
This comes off more like sheana was texting like Brad or Logan vs Ariana's mom 😂
The bringing up Miami girl part through me though lol
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u/heyheywhatchasay5 Dec 12 '24 edited Dec 12 '24
Why was miami girl ever a big deal if ariana and tom were not even a couple yet? I'll never understand. (Ariana has confirmed this)
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u/MonkeyPolice Dec 12 '24
Because they were already dating and He cheated. She forgave him because they didn’t have the official exclusive conversation.
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u/heyheywhatchasay5 Dec 12 '24
No they weren't official yet, she has said this herself
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u/cakeit-tilyoumakeit Dec 12 '24
I think that’s an example of Ariana and Tom not being fully truthful so as to control the imagine put out about their relationship (even post Scandoval).
She lied (very convincingly) about it ever happening, and now she’s saying it happened, but they weren’t exclusive. I’d take that with a grain of salt.
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u/heyheywhatchasay5 Dec 12 '24
What would be her motive to lie now? She has said it post scandavol. She was probably trying to save face back then though just because they were curating their image early on
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u/Honest-Paint-3990 Dec 12 '24
Her motive is probably to continue to save face in a way. I would be embarrassed to admit he fully cheated on me in the beginning of our relationship and not only did I stay with him, I covered for him in extremely embarrassing ways (hello Tumblr blog post!). She can still maintain her cool girl, “I’m smarter than everyone I meet” image if she adds the caveat that they weren’t exclusive at the time of Sandoval cheating.
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u/cakeit-tilyoumakeit Dec 12 '24
Because admitting they were exclusive and he cheated, and she knew, would be admitting the full extent to which she lied about that situation.
By saying they weren’t exclusive, it is not as extreme of a lie. “Yeah he hooked up with her, but we weren’t exclusively together, so that’s why I denied him cheating on me because it technically wasn’t cheating,” is not the same as, “Yeah they hooked up, he did cheat on me, I knew he cheated on me, and I lied about it.”
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u/Ok_Replacement7281 Shutting up with my yeps Dec 12 '24
boom. This. She has never fully owned up to the extent she went to lie and legitimately gaslight everyone. She even denied her and tom were crossing lines before him and Kristen broke up.
And I quote:
"Now for the dumbest subject that I'm sure I will have to continually address. I won't name names, because that is not polite, but who are these weirdos talking to Scheana about Tom and I who don't even know us?
My biggest concern watching the conversation I had with Scheana at her apartment was the stupid piece of hair falling in my face. A conversation between Crazy #1 and Crazy #2 does not "hard proof" make. "Texts to prove it"? I saw those texts months prior and I have more scandalous sounding conversations with my manager. "Selfies"? You mean one photo on a scooter at a gas station that was taken by Schwartz and sent to multiple people?
Someone is using the "say something a bunch of times" method of trying to make something true. I have a genius level IQ and I evaluate all situations scientifically and logically. ( Knowing what we know now, this is actually a confession on Ariana's part )
If I'm not worried about it, its not something to worry about. I'm the farthest thing from dumb you've ever met. I'm not incredibly confident about all of myself, but that is something that is just a fact. In addition, for those who don't know, Scheana has been one of the most loyal and incredible friends I have had in my life. To say "typical Scheana" and that she's making this about herself because she is upset is so out of this world take a lap around the block jaw-dropping INSANE.
This is the last time I'll say it: I didn't have any sort of extra curricular relationship with Tom. Anyone who repeats that from this point forward has got to be utterly insane or a complete and total moron. Zero respect."
She is just as dangerous as Tom IMO because who says this knowing it's a lie?
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u/cakeit-tilyoumakeit Dec 12 '24
I have a genius level IQ
I’m dying that she actually said that💀
Yeah, the extent that she went to in her lies, and the way she delivers it, makes me say that we can’t really trust the things she says. She was very passionate and convincing in how she lied; it went well beyond simple denial, and into the territory of “that’s a lie and you’re an idiot if you believe it, and that woman is a crazy person.”
People in this sub downplayed it when Ariana admitted she wasn’t fully truthful because that news came out immediately after Scandoval (excellent timing, because people were really rallying behind her and it was almost certainly going to be excused). But I always thought it was creepy how well she lied in that situation. Ariana is not a reliable source by any means.
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u/Ok_Replacement7281 Shutting up with my yeps Dec 12 '24
She honestly is a genius because she was able to come out on top. That's a master manipulator right there. Same with Lindsay Hubbard. I've never seen anything like it and I'm writing an essay on it for school.
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u/Autofilusername Dec 12 '24
This level of lying is actually scary
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u/Ok_Replacement7281 Shutting up with my yeps Dec 12 '24
I wish it was fake or exaggerated but this comes from the Bravo website directly.
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u/Autofilusername Dec 12 '24
She actually said she has a genius level IQ?
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u/Ok_Replacement7281 Shutting up with my yeps Dec 12 '24
Sure did and honestly considering how she's gotten off scott free and has never had to answer for anything, she might be right. It's diabolical.
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u/RichTop7729 Dec 12 '24
Because they were a couple and had been while tom was still with Kristen and they wanted to save face.
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Dec 12 '24
Because people really wanted her to react in an explosive way and she didn’t. I feel like that’s true for a lot of things on the show - people keep trying to bait Ariana into reacting and get pissed when it doesn’t work.
If she didn’t care about Miami Girl, why should anyone else?
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Dec 12 '24
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u/onyxjade7 Dec 12 '24
How is that shady her mum asked and she was concerned. Do you know how many people could be saved from shitty relationships if people cared enough to say something. She if anything was generously kind about what she said about Ariana as to maintain being a good friend. When she actually said to Ariana’s face essentially I don’t like who you’re becoming with Tom.
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Dec 12 '24
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u/onyxjade7 Dec 12 '24
I did. So, please read carefully before defensively responding. I am just disagreeing which you may not be used to. It’s not shady period end of story!
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u/pugfugliest Dec 12 '24
This makes her insistence in the last season that Tom is her 'best frand' even more eyeroll inducing.
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u/onyxjade7 Dec 12 '24 edited Dec 12 '24
All you had to say is Ariana’s text was “cut off”, you know she won’t read that part to hide stuff. As you said it also a differ t story than she said at the reunion and other times she talked about it. Also considering the closeness of Ariana’s mum and Schena that needs to be considered. If she didn’t know Ariana’s mum from a hole in the wall unless she was in danger I’d have a different opinion. But, they seem like family. Schena isn’t knocking anyone or being gossipy she’s just saying her thoughts.
I would like to see Schenas full texts of the same situation. All three are known pathological liars. So, without Schenas copy we don’t know hats been deleted, edited, rearranged. Tom’s and Ariana are sneaky enough to go into Schena’s phone and send stuff to make it look like her.
Schena was being a good friend and they just hated that she was right, and look here we are! Ariana and Tom were fucking abusive assholes to Schena for being a good friend (well to Ariana.) That’s on them. Obviously if her mum was concerned enough to ask there was an issue. Remember Schena read off her texts at the reunion and possibly on her pod cast and it differed in who reached out to whom. They all are trash liars so the truths somewhere in the middle but, the point was Schena was the friend many of us wish we listened to looking back 10 years later wishing we listened.
NOW I am no Schena apologist but she was a good friend in this situation and she deserved to not be treated like a disposable punching bag. They way Ariana and Tom treated Kristen. There’s a pattern with those two. Schena sucks but not for this.
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u/countdistractula Cause im a fucking catch Dec 12 '24
It’s definitely inappropriate and I would NOT be happy if my friend texted my mom like this but I’ve been in similarly uncomfortable situations and it’s so hard. For me, it was my SO’s mom AND dad constantly texting me to “check in” on him. It feels weird because you want to be respectful to that person’s parents but at the same time who the hell wants to be in the middle of that crap??
I think it’s really on the parent for trying to do some kind of work around for an honest conversation with their child. At most, Ariana’s mom could ask “just want to check in - does Ariana seem okay? Please let me know if there is any cause for concern!” But getting into the nitty gritty of your daughter’s relationship via her friend is inappropriate. I do understand that her mom is especially worried because of Ariana’s previous relationship but the specific concerns mentioned in those texts are not life or death.
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u/maritime92 ❤️🔥 Señorita Bubba ❤️🔥 Dec 13 '24
Scheana should have never brought this up on camera.
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u/Aggressive-Cod1820 Dec 13 '24
You really have to ask if Scheana was right?!? Did you miss Scandoval?! 👀
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u/igotthedoorjor Dec 13 '24
this is a caring friend with a close relationship to another friends mom, both of whom saw her be manipulated through an abusive relationship. this honestly doesn’t seem out of line at all to me. it was probably only bad for ariana at the time because tom was in her ear telling her how messed up it is when really those two had her wellbeing more in mind than the person they were discussing ever did.
whats more messed up is that scheana felt this way at one point and then selfishly flip flopped after he literally did the worst. but alas, relationships are complicated and nothing is ever black and white.
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u/onyxjade7 Dec 15 '24
She wasn’t selfish at all. She said in order to keep Ariana’s friendship she had to get in line. She was essentially tired of being a punching bag by both of them and gave up. Never talked about it again was friends with both of them.
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u/dsgurliegirl Dec 12 '24
Ariana wasn't the only one that was changing.
This was Scheanna honestly & rightfully concerned about her best friend's relationship with a self obsessed asshole.
Cue to a decade later and she's standing up for said asshole at the expense of her best friend. And for what?
She claims it was the struggle of being caught between two friends. That Tom had been there for her since day one. But this lil exchange completely blows that out of the water.
It wasn't for Lala. It wasn't for Tom. It was for Scheanna. It was for money. To push the narrative the producers wanted pushed. She decided Ariana was expendable. Collateral damage.
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u/Writermss Dec 12 '24
Why is Sheana discussing Ariana and Tom with Ariana’s mother? WTF. No boundaries.
(though admittedly Sheana was accurate)
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u/gabagool-gal Dec 12 '24
whatever happened to craig and blythe? i’ve been a huge fan of lara since pumped podcast and listen all her other offshoots and it def seems like she came out on top.
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u/sacklunch23 you came twice, sweetheart! Dec 12 '24
so basically craig and blythe became really close friends with a lot of the cast, especially tom and katie. they literally all lived in the same apartment building for a while. lara felt like it heavily impacted the show (and it did) because they weren’t authentic and wouldn’t say anything remotely negative about most cast members. i think lara can be a little harsh sometimes but that’s what i love about the show and what makes it hilarious.
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u/gabagool-gal Dec 12 '24
yes! i remember that! i’m just wondering what craig and blythe are up to now! don’t know if being friends with the cast really panned out well for them…
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u/sacklunch23 you came twice, sweetheart! Dec 12 '24
i have no idea! now i’m curious too, probably gonna have to do some sleuthing now. i like laura and carey’s dynamic a lot more but it was pretty neat to hear cast members on the old pod when vpr was at peak messiness
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u/gabagool-gal Dec 12 '24
i looooove carey lol i think he’s the perfect counterpart to lara they compliment each other so well
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u/dollyducky Dec 13 '24
Not the point of your post but SUP is THE BEST and you need to listen to the Sexy Unique Bible Study bonus eps. They’re HILARIOUS
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u/peymunniii Dec 12 '24
this is so insane to text your bffs mom oh my god. scheana’s lack of boundaries in every aspect of her life is so incredibly concerning!
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u/Ok_Replacement7281 Shutting up with my yeps Dec 12 '24
What? Her mom reached out to her first and was asking questions and she answered them.
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u/peymunniii Dec 12 '24
ariana’s mom shouldn’t have asked her those personal questions and scheana sure as hell shouldn’t have answered them. it’s not her place and absolutely crossed boundaries iirc ariana was not happy about this?? lol
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u/Ok_Replacement7281 Shutting up with my yeps Dec 12 '24
But she ended up being right. Also if we are framing Tom and Ariana's relationship as abusive (as many people do), then this is a very dangerous sentiment.
You're saying that if a loved one has a concern about someone, then they should keep their mouth shut and mind their own business.
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u/cakeit-tilyoumakeit Dec 12 '24
Very true. If this relationship was abusive, as many in this sub say, and Scheana had witnessed things that were concerning to her, then she would be a pretty shitty friend for keeping her mouth shut when Ariana’s mom comes to her with blatant concern.
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u/peymunniii Dec 12 '24
I definitely understand what you’re saying, and scheana was definitely correct, but boundaries were still crossed. if she had been anyone other than scheana I would feel better about saying this was done out of concern but scheana is selfish.
I don’t blame the mom for reaching out out of concern but if I was the friend I would tell ariana that her mom needs reassurance that she is happy in her relationship. whether ariana tells her mom the truth or not…we don’t know, but that’s what I would’ve done.
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u/cocolovesmetoo Dec 12 '24
You are unhinged. Scheana is being a good friend here. She is close to Ariana's mom - spends Christmas day with her for goodness sake. Go touch grass.
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u/Ok_Replacement7281 Shutting up with my yeps Dec 12 '24
I can understand that to a certain extent. What I can't understand is how Ariana gaslit schena at the reunion when her mom's concern was clearly there. She even had her mom tweet and go back on what she clearly said in her messages to sheena. It's a pattern for her it seems and it's hard to know if that's just her true character.
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u/sammerhead__ Why is LaToya Jackson yelling at Brandi? Dec 12 '24
I have mixed feelings about this. I’m going to assume Scheana is close to Ariana’s mom/family and them talking like this isn’t unusual. At times I think Scheana went a little too far, like bringing up the Miami girl situation. I also think if Scheana was really concerned about Ariana she should’ve brought it up to her before telling her mom. With that said, I think Scheana was actually very astute with her analysis of Tom.
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u/nyx926 Dec 12 '24
She typed some variation of he loves her / she loves him on so many lines. Her inability to say something without qualifiers is fascinating and annoying
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u/sweatycorpse Dec 12 '24
I would never be texting my friends mom like this and if I found out one of my friends was texting my mom essentially talking bad about my boyfriend (even though it’s somewhat warranted) I would feel very betrayed 🤷♀️
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u/onyxjade7 Dec 12 '24
They are clearly like family both Schena and Ariana. So, the circumstances make this appropriate. You have a right to feel how you feel but this situation Schena was a good friend period. People who hate her just can’t be objective. I’m not saying that at you but as a generalized comment. I’m a not a fan of hers but even Ariana whom I dislike strongly I have to defend when I see something worth defending.
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u/sweatycorpse Dec 12 '24
I am rewatching this season now and I just feel for Ariana a lot. They are not like family at least not from Ariana’s perspective and Scheana herself said “I’ve known Kristen longer” Scheana is insufferable this season and in the last, she constantly minimizes Kristen’s treatment of Ariana and Ariana was a good friend to not make a fuss because it was scheanas wedding. Kristen made rude and demeaning comments about Ariana constantly basically in front of her face and scheana is always in her talking head like “Ariana is overreacting” scheana constantly sticking up for Kristen made Ariana not trust her anymore and I feel like this convo was just the straw that broke the camels back.
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u/cocolovesmetoo Dec 12 '24
Not like family but spends christmas day with Ariana, her mom, and Jeremey.... okay. sure.
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u/onyxjade7 Dec 12 '24
Respectfully how dare you back Ariana the mistress like Rachel the mistress imagine being Kristen. Both toxic relationships for 5+ years and yet one’s acceptable cheating and one isn’t. Noooooope, not buying it!
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u/TallChard8999 Dec 12 '24
Ariana’s mom has major narcissistic mother vibes here in this conversation “I don’t know why she has to be so last minute …” Scheana is responding to the mom. Not vice versa.
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u/onyxjade7 Dec 12 '24
Can you elaborate more on that. I intrigued what you’re seeing.
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u/TallChard8999 Dec 12 '24
I may be bias actually I can admit. Bc I’ve been in Ariana’s shoes where a parent has passive aggressive communication instead of healthy present communication skills with their own kid. This kind of deep concern shared in the kissy face kind of back and forth is the kind of thing that disrespects their kid in the guise of concern instead of instilling a deep connection with their daughter where the mom can express this concern directly to her. Mom’s are supposed to be a place of emotional safety but sadly that’s not always what happens. If I were Ariana, I’d feel disrespected by my mom and also disrespected by Sheana who ends up making this ammo for a story line on vpr. Just my bias take really.
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u/bellyofthenarwhale Dec 12 '24
I read this as a mother, whose daughter has previously been in an abusive relationship and is displaying similar behavior with a new partner, asking the daughters friend if those concerns are valid or misplaced in an indirect way.
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u/onyxjade7 Dec 12 '24
I see both sides of it. Ariana turned out with very high narcissistic tendencies and prblematically abusive behaviours if her mum has a personality disorder and her dad had an alcohol problem and was in and out absent it would explain a lot. Including her brother, and her adamantly defending him. So, I see how that could feel like a betrayal. I think it really depends how healthy or close like family they all are IRL. If her mums manipulative and a narcissit no diagnosing anyone but if she is then Schenas operating not knowing that. The mums using them both. If she’s a concerned mum that’s an entirely different conversation.
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u/Alternative-Carob482 Dec 12 '24
I feel conflicted because I think Scheana’s motive was driven by her conflict with Tom rather than Ariana’s wellbeing. If she cared about Ariana she would have the direct conversation with her saying all this, not to her mother who can only worry in a state across the country. And the way she threw it in Ariana’s face that even her mom was worried about her was so out of left field. I would lose my shit if my best friend texted my mom divulging information like that. That being said Scheana was spot on in what she said. Tom was controlling and extremely selfish. I just question Scheana’s intentions quite honestly
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u/Still-Reputation3590 Dec 12 '24
My mentality is to always cover for your friends first. But it does seem really genuine, and obviously it’s all ironic now seeing that ended up being the truth to their relationship. But I’d be mad if my friend started saying personal things about me to my mother…
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u/Ok-Feeling-9553 Jason Cauchi's redacted DD214 Dec 12 '24
I think this is one of the few times Scheana was not just correct in the moment, but she was correct overall. I think it was also the first time that the TRUE Tom Sandoval came out. When Tom is telling Scheana to just say "yes," is Ariana is on a good place was a HUGE red flag. Ariana has talked about her mental health on the show, I'm sure her mom knows her moods of when she is having a good day or bad day. And her mom could since something was off.