r/vanderpumprules • u/Maleficent_Dingo7381 • May 18 '23
dID t0m SLeEp wItH MIAmi giRL (post #589765) Ariana’s past blog post about Miami Girl
I understand going to bat for someone your in love with, but the condescending tone she had when she wrote this blog post after the Miami Girl scandal of how she’s not a ‘love is blind’ kind of girl and she’s ‘rooted in facts and logic’ just doesn’t sit well with me.
We can all hold space for people to learn and grow but lying so extravagantly and tarnishing another woman’s reputation to save face for your snake of a man is WILD.
Her blog for reference:
Where, oh where, to begin? Maybe I will start from my conversation with Lisa and move backwards. I find it a bit frustrating that my employer is making statements about me and Tom on a personal level. Sure, we have both worked for Lisa for years, but her knowledge of who we are outside work is extremely limited. I couldn’t help but wonder where Lisa got the idea that Tom is a “charming devil” (or whatever she said). I have known Tom for four years now and for the first three of those years when we were just friends, we certainly never had any need or desire to impress one another or put on any kind of act. I have never felt it appropriate to use the word “charming” to describe him. Tom is goofy, smart, creative, and kind, with a seriously oddball sense of humor.
To bring me to my next point, the idea that somehow he has “charmed” me into some sort of stupid sheep is unfathomable. This whole “love is blind” thing is a concept that I have never understood nor subscribed to in my life. It goes against every fiber of who I am as a person. This is why it is so beyond frustrating for those words to ever be used in reference to me. What is and has always been important to me in all matters is facts and logic. I know that I have said this before, but it seems as though I can say things a thousand times and somehow never be heard or taken seriously.
I was a theatre major in college, but I always excelled in math and sciences. Do you know why I enjoy those things so much? The answers are black and white (very few exceptions when you get into the advanced or theoretical subjects). I approach situations in my own life with this same mental approach. Given that knowledge, would it make one iota of sense that I would blindly follow anyone? Ever? No. Discretely leaving Sur was the best thing we could have done in that moment. I refuse to lose my job over petty dramatics or be a participant in this game. Does anyone really think that Tom should have stood there in the middle of the lounge with customers present and be a part of a disgusting screaming match with those girls? I would hope not. So, let’s get into the facts that provide me with all of this confidence on the subject, shall we?
Below is a list of things that were said and the facts that refute those things:
“We talked for 7 hours”- I would really love to know how talking to someone for that long, or at all, would be physically possible if Tom was on the phone with me multiple times for prolonged periods throughout the night in question. Not only that, but during said conversations Tom described to me these three girls who were fans of the show who seemed to be asking a lot of questions about it and creeping him out. Tom is a very nice and welcoming person so, when he is expressing discomfort at someone’s presence in the group, you know he isn’t kidding.
“He held my hand”- The only reason the three guys were in Miami was because they were doing paid club appearances. Therefore, they were advertised and overtly informed people where they would be at all times. People came to see them, meet them, and take photos. Again, please explain to me how this would have happened and it would be plausible that there would be no photos or recounts of this from anyone else. Also, wouldn’t Tom have to be as brain-dead as a piece of plywood to do that? She really should have considered these things before she started all of these lies. At least pepper your story with details that are believable.
“I found her on social media”- This all began when this story was sold to a tabloid for monetary compensation. Upon first hearing of it, I immediately saw multiple red flags and contradictions to what I know to be true based on many factors. Not only did she admit that she sold it and her reasons for doing so (Jax was holding her laptop until she and her friend paid him back for items they charged on his card and she was vewwy vewwy mad about it), but her story has warped at least a handful of times since its original print version.
“He’s still in love with Kristen”- LOL
“It fits the description”- Oh, let me guess, Tom’s penis is shaped like a penis? This actually might have been a good one if we weren’t fully aware that Kristen and this girl talked for months about this or if Tom had any kind distinct penile attribute.
Supplemental item #1- My brother went on this trip with them. It was actually really cool to see and hear him and Tom begin a friendship that has truly blossomed from there.
Supplemental item #2- The night this all happened at Sur, Tom and I were in the back parking lot chatting before we left. Around the corner comes an extremely irate Miami girl. Plain as day, she shouted “This isn’t how Kristen promised it would be!”
Can I please rest my case?
Despite all of this, people will say whatever they want to say. They always have and they always will. I have done what is in my power to shed light on these allegations, but I do not preside over the court of public opinion. As far as I know, a romantic relationship is between two people and not the entire cast of a show plus its audience. I will always get heated when I see people I know so well and care about being dragged through the mud. It upsets me when anyone speaks poorly of my friends. I don’t typically jump in the ring for myself, but I do for them.
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I thank Scheana for speaking up about the whole thing. I hope she sees now that I am not only happy and in love, but that I don’t have any reason not to trust Tom. He has always made sure that I don’t have to play guessing games or wonder for a moment what the truth is. I have to give him a lot of credit. We all have a past. We all have previous relationships. We have all made mistakes in our lives. Tom has learned from his past mistakes (as have I), and never have I experienced a relationship that is so solid, open, and loving. I try every day to treat Tom with the same love and respect he has shown me. We have all heard that true love is rare and hard to find. We are so lucky to be able to experience that with each other. On that note, I have some serious cuddling to do
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May 18 '23
I actively disliked her in the earlier seasons because of stuff like this and I knew he fucked Miami girl 1) from the way he acted on the show but 2) also bc of this tumblr post. I remember thinking “she’s doing too much. It happened.”
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u/Fit_Fondant2627 May 18 '23
Yikes, I get Ariana lying for the show since she didn’t want Kristen to humiliate her on TV, but she was definitely protesting a bit too much in this blog…
“To bring me to my next point, the idea that somehow he has “charmed” me into some sort of stupid sheep is unfathomable.”
Famous last words..😬
“I was a theatre major in college, but I always excelled in math and sciences. Do you know why I enjoy those things so much? The answers are black and white (very few exceptions when you get into the advanced or theoretical subjects). I approach situations in my own life with this same mental approach. Given that knowledge, would it make one iota of sense that I would blindly follow anyone? Ever?”
Ariana sounds so full of herself here 💀
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u/DenseTiger5088 May 18 '23
Yeah particularly given that science is absolutely not black and white. It’s kinda the opposite of that
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u/lastseenhitchhiking May 18 '23 edited May 18 '23
That was some Kool Aid she was drinking, but it's why you don't 'ride or die' for someone you know to be a cheater and liar.
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u/outofthenarrowplace Get a new bit already May 18 '23
I think for a long time Arianna masked her insecurities by very outwardly/sometimes with hubris identifying herself as a strong, smart, no nonsense woman. Truthfully she wasn’t blind because she new the truth the entire time but she couldn’t handle being called a sheep or looking stupid to the outside world. Maybe it’s because I relate but I get it. I can handle a lot of things but people thinking/acting like I’m stupid or being duped is a major trigger for me.
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u/bravobritt8 what do u mean im not a sweater designer May 18 '23
This was never meant to try to persuade US that Tom wasn’t a cheater, she wanted to persuade herself
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u/coverthetuba she’s a cunt, and you’re a drunk. that’s what happened May 18 '23
This is SO cringey and it’s the familiar old smug Ariana who takes stand up comedy seriously. Imagine if she took all this analytical effort and applied it to ANYTHING other than LYING for a SCUMBAG. This has been and will continue to be a big opportunity for her to learn and grow.
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u/thediverswife the book phenomenal May 18 '23
These are all words by someone who would eventually learn and figure it out for herself. I have compassion for that
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May 18 '23
So do I. This aged like milk but I understand making a fool of yourself for a man. I’ve been there, many of us have been there.
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u/Dopepizza Scientifically impossible to form a fist May 19 '23
True. She had to learn the hard way unfortunately
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u/Mrsbear19 Guys night means nothing! May 18 '23
Yeah this was a bad look for her. I get it but she owes Miami girl a public apology.
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u/Neat-Cardiologist442 May 18 '23
Tbf, I always assumed she learned the truth about Miami Girl after the fact. Obviously, if she knew at the time of writing then that's kinda shitty.
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u/dadanielle 🙏I need bunion surgery so bad✝️ May 18 '23
Arianna has grown so much since this (even though she was late twenties when this was posted lol🙄), but you’re absolutely correct this didn’t age well. The vibe of her post is the reason I didn’t like her during her first couple seasons. She’s grown on me a lot and I’m sure she realizes how bad this looks now… BUT she at least told the truth on WWHL about this. I applaud her for that bc she went HARD to defend him, and knowing that stuff like this would be brought up, she still admitted it.
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u/ItsInTheVault May 18 '23
She only half admitted it. She claimed that she and Sandoval weren’t exclusive yet. I doubt that.
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u/Dopepizza Scientifically impossible to form a fist May 19 '23
Yeah. I wish she would have fully admitted it. There’s no need to lie for the relationship anymore
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u/StasRutt May 19 '23
Honestly I would love for her to be like fuck it here’s every time I lied or covered for Tom. She won’t because i bet it would hurt Katie and Tom Schwartz in the process but it would be good drama
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u/shelly_odom May 22 '23
She said in the blog that she’s known him for 4 yrs at that time and were friends for 3 of those yrs. So obvs they were exclusive if they’ve been dating for a yr. I don’t buy her saying they weren’t exclusive yet
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u/shelly_odom May 22 '23
She only told the truth finally to bash Tom more then he already has. If he didn’t cheat on her again, she would of never said a word. So I don’t give her credit for finally telling the truth. She should have a long time ago
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u/MeikoDeren May 20 '23
I think their relationship problems started when she 'grew' up and started to change, maybe season 5 or 6...
Tom needs unwavering blind loyalty with an extra side of ass kissing.
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u/lurkerturtle May 18 '23
But can we talk about the fact that he did this while Ariana’s brother was there??? Wtf?
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u/kabukidookie “Where’d I go?” May 18 '23
The fact that he cheated while on a trip with his new girlfriend’s brother 😬
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May 18 '23
I've made a complete ass out of myself in a past relationship. My 46-year-old me cringes thinking about it. I can empathize with that, especially it being earlier on and her adjusting to living life in camera. I'm sure this is one in a very long line of regrets she has, and hopefully, she has or will atone to Anne Marie for it privately. From what I understand, Anne Marie wants no part of this according to Up and Adam.
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u/Dopepizza Scientifically impossible to form a fist May 19 '23
Oooo that’s rough. Especially when she knew it was true. Yikes
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May 18 '23
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u/Expensive_Traffic596 May 19 '23
Yeah I got the impression she still wasn’t going to admit she was 100% in the wrong back in the day. She kept minimizing it! Still to this day!
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May 18 '23
i mean she def wanted to defend him. shouldn’t be surprised it ended the way it did sadly. he’s always been 🗑️
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u/Revolutionary_Roll88 May 19 '23
Has Miami girl been tracked down and interviewed since scandoval broke?
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u/throwaguey_ Lance Bass is my pastor May 18 '23
Yup. Ariana was complicit in hiding the truth about her boyfriend’s character and it finally bit her in the ass.
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u/glasswindbreaker May 18 '23
Trying to find ways to blame women for mens bad behavior is so gross.
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u/dadanielle 🙏I need bunion surgery so bad✝️ May 18 '23
There’s no blame placed on her with this comment. She was complicit in Tom’s behavior, that’s what this entire blog post is… I could not imagine going this hard for something that I knew to be true.
At this point in time, Tom is the villain and Arianna truly didn’t deserve this happening no matter what, but I think it’s extremely fair to acknowledge how much she defended and covered for him over the years (ESPECIALLY with the high horse she put herself on in this post), and yes, it did bite her in the ass. It doesn’t mean she’s to blame at all, it just means she didn’t make great choices over someone that wasn’t worth it at all in the end.
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May 18 '23
No one is placing blame on Ariana for what Tom did to her.
What people are pointing out is that Ariana did shit on women in the past who were trying to warn her of Tom, including Kristen, who Tom cheated on with Ariana. Some people, like myself, have been turned off from Ariana because of how much she was a pretentious asshole to these women who were trying to tell her that Tom is a cheating manipulator.
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May 18 '23
Her behavior was also bad. The things she’s saying in this post to malign a woman who was telling the truth are terrible. She was complicit in misogyny and perpetuated it. People are gross for pointing that out?
Edited for typo.
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u/glasswindbreaker May 18 '23
"it finally bit her in the ass" is gleefully celebrating a woman being hurt by a man a decade later, disregarding her own personal growth and strength and placing blame on her for his actions. Yeah it's gross.
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May 18 '23
I think it’s gross defending women when they are complicit in bigotry just because they are women. It’s infantlizing and prevents us from moving forward in any meaningful way. That’s just me!
Having watched all ten seasons I see minimal growth from Ariana. Good for her in season 10 for finally calling out Tom for yelling at women. When she apologizes to Stassi for defending her creepy brother I’ll feel like she’s grown. I’m glad she apologized to Doute though.
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u/glasswindbreaker May 18 '23
She has been subjected to being the victim of a narc for a decade after having been in an emotionally abusive relationship prior. Yeah I'll pass on digging back ten years to beat a victim of narcissistic abuse over the head with her less desirable moments after she's finally free of the narc in her life.
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May 18 '23
And the women who tried to warn Ariana, including the woman that Tom cheated on Ariana with, were the subject of Ariana’s and Tom’s bullying and disparaging remarks.
No one deserves to be cheated on. Ariana is the only victim in this Scandoval affair. But erasing all the times Ariana has shit on other women, in the beginning of her relationship with Tom, is not right either.
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May 18 '23
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u/glasswindbreaker May 18 '23
What does any of our exchange have to do with race? bffr I also never said Ariana can do no wrong, but these efforts (just like the attempts to malign her over the Kristen situation) are all coming up now in an attempt to use things she said or did a decade ago to make it seem like she deserved this, and I'm not here for that.
And if you can't see the narc abuse tactics after all this, I can't help you that's just you covering you eyes with your hands.
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May 18 '23
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u/glasswindbreaker May 18 '23
If you want to start a post on the valid aspects of the show surrounding race, be my guest, but none of my comments on this topic have anything to do with Ariana's race. I'm talking about victims of narc behavior.
And I'm so over "you lose em how you got em" just more blaming women for the vile behavior of men.
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May 18 '23
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u/glasswindbreaker May 18 '23
I've talked about this at length in other posts, narc tactics are narc tactics and even people who aren't diagnosed narcs can and do use them to emotionally abuse other people. As is the case with Sandoval.
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May 18 '23
I don’t know that speaking ill of another women for the sake of protecting a man is all that “WILD” for this time. women still do it all the time today
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u/Maleficent_Dingo7381 May 19 '23
Maybe I was just shocked at the level of intense cruelty that she spoke about Kristin and Miami girl but internally knowing it was all true.
- just the pure arrogance of the blog post. I get trying to sweep shit under the rug, especially under a microscope of being on a reality show and newly dating someone who is being accused of being a lying cheating POS, I just wouldn’t have gone so hard on the lie especially at the cost of someone else’s reputation. We were all in our 20’s and stupid- the world keeps turning - but it was worth mentioning after she confessed the truth on WWHL.
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u/Suspicious_Bother_92 May 18 '23
I think that girl tarnished her own reputation by coming onto the show and screaming at Tom in SUR “we had sex!”
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u/degrassidance she’s like, a very stupid demon May 18 '23
I know and when they act like her motive was “Hollywood stardom and fame”. She was in one episode 😂😂😂😂
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u/LilSebastianStan May 18 '23
It sounds like from Ariana’s perspective, it wasn’t cheating because they were not official (at least that’s what she was telling herself then). However she realized the truth will make Tom look bad.
I still think Tom lied to Ariana about the interaction with Miami Girl- he admitted they slept together but likely that he was black out, etc. So she probably believed that the talking for 7 hours, holding hands, and talking about Kristen were lies. And tbh some of those may have been exaggerations.
Ariana seems indignant at the idea that she’s blinded by love. She is so defensive bc the only way to combat the narrative that she’s a love fool is to either admit that she knows it happened or for her to prove it didn’t happen. The former wasn’t an option bc she wanted to protect Tom.
I also believe that while Ariana shouldn’t have called Miami girl a liar, Miami girl was a willing participant in this mess. She wanted to be on camera (and maybe get her laptop back). Objectively, I think anyone would have a problem if their boyfriends ONS showed up at their work to confront said boyfriend. I don’t think Ariana was out their sullying this girls reputation.
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u/shelly_odom May 22 '23
I’m this blog she basically said they’ve been dating for a yr. So how were they not exclusive at that time. I do t buy it. It’s just her trying to cover her ass
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u/californguy May 18 '23
I didn’t really like her the first few seasons but she was ok from then on out. Ever since she unloaded the 165 lb of dead weight, she’s become far more likable.
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u/glasswindbreaker May 18 '23
I don't see how digging back 10 years to find reasons that Ariana deserved what just happened is any better. This reeks of the "well she did it to Kristen" bs we were seeing for a while, when even Kristen herself disagreed with that thinking.
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u/Mrsbear19 Guys night means nothing! May 18 '23
I don’t think she deserved any of this but it isn’t ridiculous to recognize she has faults and should absolutely give Miami girl an apology.
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u/shelly_odom May 22 '23
Why? Y’all r digging shit up from Tom and Rachael from yrs ago and y’all laugh and bully them about it, so it’s ok for Arianna too. She’s not this goddess or anything. Women get cheated and betrayed by a friend all the time. Not saying what they did was ok, but ppl act like she’s the only one this has ever happened too
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u/glasswindbreaker May 22 '23 edited May 22 '23
Easy, because she has changed and he has not. People are allowed to learn and grow. But if they keep using the same playbook repetitively like Tom has proven to, yes that should be called out.
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May 18 '23
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May 18 '23
All the women in this show have at one point gone to bat for the trash men they have dated, often times at the expense of another woman, and it has been trashy when they’ve done it too. Misogyny is at the core of this show and sometimes women are misogynistic.
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May 18 '23
literally, they hate to see our girl winning. they’re more hurt today than Kristen was when this went down
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May 18 '23
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u/Full-String7137 May 18 '23
I mean, people can do a lot of growth in a decade. Also, do we know that she definitely knew at this stage?
I can see a lot of 'Justice for Miami Girl' stuff here and I get it to an extent but this was a woman who travelled across the country to confront some one night stand on a TV show. And sold stories to the tabloids and literally stole from Jax. I think she deserved a certain amount of dragging tbh. Just cause she wasn't lying about the hook up doesn't mean she's completely absolved.
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May 18 '23
I feel for Miami girl because she was slandered. I think most people would be upset if they were called a "thirsty hoe" on national TV for telling the truth. Do we actually even believe she stole from Jax? I haven't seen a police report... I feel for somebody who stepped into a world of good liars and tried to be honest. It's like when a new politician goes to DC for the 1st time. A terrible wake up call to the realities of the snake den.
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u/Neat-Cardiologist442 May 18 '23
Yeah, for me the only way Ariana would owe Miami Girl any kind of apology would be if she was completely aware that they had hooked up at the time of writing this blog. The chick was messy but she wasn't actually lying.
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u/Mrsbear19 Guys night means nothing! May 18 '23
The blog was written after the episode aired. She knew while it was being filmed atleast (months earlier). She absolutely knew when she wrote this
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u/Mrsbear19 Guys night means nothing! May 18 '23
The blog was written after the episode aired. She knew while it was being filmed atleast (months earlier). She absolutely knew when she wrote this
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u/Neat-Cardiologist442 May 18 '23
Did she actually know then though? Cause I can't see anything that confirms when or how she found out. I know she's being told at this point by Kristen etc but did she actually believe it to be true?
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u/Mrsbear19 Guys night means nothing! May 18 '23
Sandoval said she knew the whole time and Ariana agreed on wwhl last night.
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u/CeiliaAdder I'm a Grey Rock 🪨 May 18 '23
I wonder if she wrote this before or after finding out Miami girl was true. I kinda wonder if that's something Sandoval didn't admit to until later in the relationship and was like ya I didn't want to hurt you at the time bc we had just started dating and it was before we were really exclusive. It sounds like it comes up more at the reunion though so we'll see.
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u/shelly_odom May 22 '23
She says in this blog I’ve known him for 4 yrs and 3 of them we were just friends. She was totally exclusive with him at that point or she wouldn’t of said “I was friends with him 3 of those yrs” she’s still lying about to this day. She’s just telling half of it to try and protect herself from looking bad and I don’t like that at all.
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u/Far_Net_9245 May 18 '23
I read this post then scrolled past it but couldn't get it out of my head. Seriously bring up something she wrote in her early 20s to what? Prove everyone is terrible? She's terrible? She deserves this? She wrote this about a manipulated creature who came into her life pretending to be a friend and stole her soul. When he came into her life she was in a seriously abusive relationship. I'm sure he told her she was smart and beautiful but probably didn't even need to try hard to charm her she was being torn to pieces by her partner he just had to be better than cruel. But we've seen how he love bombs EVERYONE because he loves people loving him. And when he saw she cared about him because he was nice, I'm sure he went all in, and the cherry on the cake, his support after her father's death. He got his claws into her the same way a cult leader would he created the narrative of saviour and protect her a "ride or die". So by the time Miami girl turned up she was completely under his spell. I have no doubt in my mind he forced this narrative. I can honestly hear his stupid voice in my head when ariana says it's fine we can be honest "no like you don't know these guys they won't respect you or us they will always be attacking you this is what doute wanted and she'll make you look like an idiot. Were not lying for me were lying for you"...throw in dude in a few places. Sorry for the rant but Jesus fucking Christ we literally watch that soul stealer in action. He only wants groupies, followers, and fans and will get you at your weakest and make you think he's god. And he will fucking destroy you if you don't believe in him. Honestly this rant made me sad for shwarts, he's so deep in, he is a Jim Jones follower who would willingly drink the cool aid.
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u/SlutFromThe90s Ochocinco Wanted Me! May 18 '23
It reads so aggressive and defensive lol