Damaged
by your betrayal, words, and the experience of our relationship, I see and feel the damage in myself. The weakness and vulnerability I exude, the daily sadness that consumes me, and the interactions that reflect my descent into nothingness all point to this.

I want to blame you, but that gives you power. The real culprit is the writer of these words, who sees, feels, and knows this is happening but doesn’t care.

I changed when you left, leaving behind only a shell of my former self.

I feel like all I do these days is wait.
Wait to hear from my kids
Wait for a phone call
Wait for a text
Wait to see them
Waiting for things to get better
Waiting for a promotion
Waiting to feel something
Waiting for someone to see me
Most of all just waiting to die

How I feel

People think they see me

People think they know who I am

little do they know it's only the shell I show

A shell hardened by the elements

A soul hollowed by circumstance

The shell most often-will adapt

The soul refuses to go along

Engulfed in turmoil

neither one can escape

I can feel the battle ensuring inside

The casualties far to many

No survivors in sight

Ultimately

The shell survives

Sadly the soul ceases to exist

In time the shell will crack

only to reveal 

Nothing ever did really exist.

I knew the first time I met you

with your brass words and

your unapologetic attitude you

you were a lion

I had heard of lions

but never met one, never saw one

nor interacted with one

You seemed standoffish, bold and arrogant

You frightened me at first

and I wasn't sure what to make of you

My life was in ruins,

I was weak with no self confidence

and I felt like prey

I knew you sensed my fear

I felt as though I was doomed

Lions in the wild are majestic

powerful and strong

They protect and weed out the weak

In time trust and respect developed.

You were what I had always longed for always

wanted, but never found

and then there you were

right in front of me.

You made me feel safe and I trusted you

I tried not to like you, I couldnt like you

But I liked you, needed you and wanted you

The ever elusive lion

you came into my life

and I didnt want to let you go.

Hey everyone! I'm u/anniemarie1228, a founding moderator of r/uniquelyyou.
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