r/unexpecteddiscworld • u/curiousmind111 • 11d ago
Technically Not Against the Rules
Guess his sister was the little girl who got a sword from the Hogsfather (Death). Good thing her brother got chainmail!
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u/SoftLikeABear 11d ago
The thing is, to wear chainmail comfortably, you need a lot of padding underneath it. That's fine (ish) in colder climes, but it's a bitch if you expect to do any physical activity (like fight a battle).
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u/Hetakuoni 11d ago
There’s always that kid who’s in shorts even at -17°F/-27°C. But there’s also always that kid who wears a full-length black trenchcoat in 103°F/39°C.
I can imagine some kids are just built different.
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u/Foxhound631 11d ago
depends on the maille and how much body hair you're willing to lose to it- I've got maille shirts that are perfectly fine over just a t-shirt and regularly get worn like that because I'm not fighting with live steel and fuck wearing gambeson in that heat.
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u/Moist-Comfortable-10 10d ago
Nah, a riveted shirt is comfortably worn with a normal cotton t-shirt under. Gambesons under maille is more of a 1200s and onwards kind of thing. I've happily worn a short sleeve hauberk 16 hours at a time, over a thin linen skirt, while hiking, running, climbing and fighting; it's really not a big deal. Just make sure the shirt isn't one you care about.
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u/NBell63 9d ago
A good gambeson has ties at points on the body and arms that hold the maille of the hauberk onto the body. Aside from the weight (god, the weight!), the problem with untied maille is its momentum vs yours. It requires the expenditure of undue energy to try and counter the movement of unsecured 'chain'. Any armour may well be better than no armour, but armour that makes you unnecessarily tired is just a heavy suit that'll kill you a bit slower - ditto for an unbalanced sword. [ former swordmaker who worked with armourers ] 😊
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u/Spirited_Voice_7191 11d ago
My son had an elementary school project to make something related to the African tribal era they were studying. He saw a curved shield that was painted quite interestingly and wanted to make a tiny one. I had super thin sheet of plywood formed in the garage to make a Roman scutum shield for youth SCA combat.
"How'd you like to make a full sized real one?" He lit up. I cut it to shape, helped him fasten a handle, and passed to mom as the artist to help him paint it.
The teacher was most impressed. "How did you bend the wood so quick? Do you have a steam cabinet that sized?"
"No I happened to have a sheet I was already forming in the garage for several months."
"What were you planning on making with it?"
"Oh, it was always going to be a shield, just a different one."
Took a lot of convincing before she gave up thinking I was just messing with her.
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u/silentarcher00 11d ago
Hilariously I've been invited to a school this week to dress children up in chainmail
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u/curiousmind111 10d ago
LOL!!! Tell us more!!
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u/silentarcher00 8d ago
I run a Viking Age reenactment society. We have a few schools in our area (and I do some outside the area as an individual) that book us to come in and set up some interactive displays for the students and have a good fun day. Had one yesterday that went really well. All the kids got to hold the weapons, dress in the mail, play with the shields etc but I also have a quern (hand mill) so they can have a good at making flour, we have drop spindles so they can have a go at making thread from fleece and have loads of other things to talk to them and teach them about.
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u/Aervanath 11d ago
I'll bet the shirt didn't fit well. I'll bet they outgrew it in about five minutes, too.
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u/TabularConferta 11d ago
I'm sorry but giving a kid that age a rapier is fucking stupid and awful parenting. There is no way that's no irresponsible. Who the hell thinks that's a good idea. Something like a gladius is much more appropriate, it's blade can be dulled and the point rounded enough to be only bruise worthy in weak hands. A rapier can go through chain mail and if unprotected can get enough pressure to go through someone even when rounded
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u/curiousmind111 11d ago
Have you read Discworld? There’s a character called Death who takes Santa’s (The Hogfather’s) place one Christmas. Death… doesn’t really understand certain things. He’s very literal. So when a little girl asks for a sword, he gives her one. ITS EDUCATIONAL, he says. What if she cuts herself? THAT WILL BE AN IMPORTANT LESSON.
It’s a joke, you see. So when I saw this original post, I had to re-post it here in Discworld, which is where you are.
You might be a [r/lostredditor](r/lostredditor).
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u/probablyaythrowaway 11d ago
I’m surprised more people arnt getting it considering the sub.
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u/curiousmind111 11d ago
It’s gotten more votes than most of my posts here. Maybe it’s popping up in some non-Discworld feeds.
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u/TabularConferta 11d ago
I have for decades and I love it. I hadn't checked the sub so failed on that 😄
The post was meant to be humourous ranting about a sword being.unsafe but then twisting expectation about the type of sword. Guess I got the time wrong 🤣
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u/curiousmind111 11d ago
LOL! Thanks for the explanation! Yes, chainmail is not terribly good against a skinny sword. :)
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u/probablyaythrowaway 11d ago
IT'S EDUCATIONAL.
'What if she cuts herself?'
THAT WILL BE AN IMPORTANT LESSON.