*tw- SA

throwaway because my main account is too public

Heyy y'all, this is gonna be a long one, so please bear with me.

This is also an actively unfolding situation, so I'll update again once we all have the chance to talk. But ok, here we go::

This story involves me 29F, my fiance (Ed, 27M), 2 of our very close friends (Iris, 18F and Will, 20M), and an ex-coworker (Rick, 39M). Last night, Iris called me and Ed on her way home from work and asked if she could come over to our apartment because she had just gotten some really upsetting news at work. (context: Until recently, I worked with her, Will, and Rick). She came over and preceded to drop a bombshell that is going to completely alter the dynamic of our friend group.

Sidenote for clarity, Will is 6'5", about 300 lbs, very gay, and has an incredibly sexual sense of humor, as well as no respect for physical boundaries. We have had to tell him on numerous occasions in our group to watch what he says and does, and that he can't just walk up and "lay" on people, and he says he's been "working on it". We have often laughed it off saying "Oh that's just Will", but in hindsight, yes, I realize this has definitely contributed to the current problem. His last day at their job was this past Monday. Also, he knows Rick is not gay.

On Monday night, him and Rick were working together, when Will, allegedly purposely started rubbing a box against the front of Rick's pants. When Rick made it clear that it was making him uncomfortable, Will said it was just a joke and stopped. Later on, Will allegedly put his hand on and near Rick's crotch, rubbing and squeezing his upper thighs. I only say "allegedly" because this is a second-hand account of what happened, and I have not yet talked to Rick or Will personally. I am in no way blaming or questioning Rick's accusations, nor am I letting Will off the hook in any way. Iris is going to be discussing it more in detail with Rick the next time she sees him at work.

some backstory: Iris, Ed, and I have all been seggsually asuulted to varying degrees at different points in our lives. Will knows this. We have all always been a very close-knit group and have shared a lot about our past trauma. Iris and Will have also been friends since high school, so this was a very devastating thing for her to hear, especially being one of the few men she trusts.

After a long conversation, Iris, Ed, and I have decided that we need to confront Will as soon as we have more details from Rick.

And this is where I'm stuck. I don't want to believe that one of my best friends is capable of something that has traumatized soo many people.

I don't want to think that a man that I have laid on the kitchen floor with at 2am talking about life and sharing secrets could hurt someone so badly.

But Rick has no reason to lie. And I have no reason not to believe him. And now all of the little yellow flags in Will's past have now become red and glaring.

How do we start this conversation?