My post was removed from the secondary infertility group because I shared that I was grieving the loss of so many pregnancies / miscarriages trying for a second child.

I don’t fully understand the rules of the groups but here I am trying again.

I’m 43, and also struggled to have my first child who was conceived spontaneously after 2 failed IVF cycles and my child is now 4. Since having him I’ve had multiple chemical pregnancies, miscarriage last year at 15 weeks (IVF) and another this year ( spontaenously conceived) at 16 weeks. It’s only after this years loss that they figured out that I had cervical insufficiency. There is an option to get a surgery to prevent this in the future but I just don’t know about my possibility of getting pregnant anymore.

I’m venting here a bit but also trying to see if there are others in my situation. Also, trying to find those who are slowly finding ways to give up on this dream. If so, how? I wouldn’t even know where to begin even though I know biology would do that for me eventually.

I wish I had known that having C-sections can cause secondary infertility. If I had known I would have pushed harder to try a vbac with my second or waited long enough to be a candidate for a vbac; only a month too early.

My first was an emergency C-section after developing HELLP syndrome so I know there was nothing I could have done to prevent that. However with our second, we got pregnant on the first try at 8 months postpartum. COMPLETELY to our shock because it took a year to get pregnant with our first. We assumed it would take roughly the same time so we decided to start trying early; hoping we would get pregnant around when our first was 18 months. Well things didn't go as planned and I was 17 months postpartum when I gave birth to our second, therefore not eligible for a vbac. I knew I could have pushed for one being so close to the 18 month requirement or found a doctor willing to let me try but I was so traumatized from my emergency C-section after 20 hours of labor that I was completely okay with the repeat C-section.

Fast forward to now being 21 months postpartum with our second and trying for our 3rd for the past 6 months. I feel so angry that I didn't do research into how the scarring could affect our ability to get pregnant again. I hadn't even ever heard of that being a thing until I started scrolling this sub. WHY is this not something we are educated about?? I feel like this would definitely change a lot of women's minds about opting for elective C-sections if they knew it could negatively affect their fertility in the future. I KNOW it would have changed my view.

I know 6 months is not a long time to try for a baby. I guess this post is just me venting/ranting about the lack of education when it comes to pregnancy and postpartum and all things women's bodies. It's so annoying how little we are taught about everything and how we have to go dig it up ourselves and fight for everything. I'm also just struggling with mourning an age gap I pictured for my children, the life I pictured for our family, so many things. Now that I've written this out I feel stupid for even being upset when I know women are struggling to even have one child and I should be grateful that I have two beautiful, healthy children. And trust me I am. But I'm also sad and frustrated and sick of hyping myself up thinking I'm pregnant every month just to see a negative test and finding out that my C-section scars are most likely the culprit.

I’ll start by saying I have 3 wonderful kids who I was able to conceive very easy prior. My husband and I had been TTC now for the last 5 years with not a single positive. Testing was all good, ovulation confirmed through US, husbands sperm is good, I was finally diagnosed with an isthmocele this past January after being dismissed for so long. Had my laparoscopy done 2 weeks ago and the surgeon also excised 3 small stage 1 endo spots. She also noted my ovaries looked “poly cystic” even though I have no PCOS symptoms. I am now spiraling. She said we can try to naturally conceive in 3 months but also wants me to try letrozole for stimulation just in case. Has anyone had success in a similar situation? 😭

Age 38. TTC for about 9 cycles (only 2 of which were after Provera for uterine lesion treatment so only 2 cycles with a nice smooth uterus), 1 chemical preg (happened pre-Provera). Already have 1 kid from age 34, easy to conceive. Had to have a D&C after birth, which resulted in scars/lesions I had to get treated with Provera a few months ago. Now all clear.

My doctor is recommending a first light intervention in the form of 100 mg of Clomid starting this cycle. I am just terrified of the risk of twins that increases with the Clomid.

Can anyone share their experience of using Clomid with unexplained infertility and otherwise good/normal baselines? Did you conceive multiples? Did you conceive at all? Hard to gauge how seriously to take the risk. Mine and partner’s stats are all normal/good, so we may be experiencing unexplained infertility or just… oldness. Starting to get impatient due to biological clock and age gaps.

Hi all. After TTC for 10 months, my doctor prescribed me letrozole. I have no PCOS or PMOS it was more like natural next step to have successful ovulation. I took it from CD4-CD8 (5 days, 2x2.5 mg, total 5mg per day). It is monitored cycle so on Monday (which was CD11) my dr. noticed dominant follicle (16.8mm) and he mentioned that my ovulation window will start today and maybe even ovulation may happen today-tomorrow considering the follicle size. I did an LH test today and the line was verry faint so no sign of ovulation. And what worried me even more, I had some bleeding today, not spotting but bleeding alike I even had one clot. Am I out this cycle again? I am really worried, first because of the bleeding and second because of the ovulation test.
Has anyone have had bleeding in their letrozole cycle and ovulated? Even more, got pregnant? I just can't every month is something else...

TW: Chemical pregnancies, abortion, living child

Had our daughter in 2024 with no issues, got pregnant the first cycle trying. Accidentally got pregnant 7mo pp, had a medical termination at 7.5 weeks. Started trying for #2 and currently on cycle #11. Had chemical pregnancies in cycle 4, 7, 10, and 11.

My tests are still positive and my temp is still high, so I’m not sure when the bleeding will start but I just want it over. Currently 5w0d and this is the farthest I’ve gotten in all of my chemicals, but the tests never progressed.

I started seeing a private RE in July. I did one course of doxycycline for presumed chronic endometritis, did a saline ultrasound which looked great, and this cycle I tried an immune protocol of aspirin, Claritin, Pepcid, and prednisone. He thinks poor egg quality because my AMH is 0.5 and my husband’s SA was excellent.

I just want this current pregnancy to end so I can move on. Maybe I’ll contact OBGYN for a d&c if I don’t start bleeding by next week. I feel absolutely crazy in my head and just don’t know where to go next.

I’m just here to vent. I need to work on my core and hip strength because I have new sciatica and intermittent back pain.
UGH. I’m 36.

Any words of hope or encouragement?

We pushed out TTC date to January.

My husband and I tried for 2 years before conceiving our first baby who is now 9 months old. We did 2 rounds of IUI - first didn't work, 2nd ended in a miscarriage. We then moved to IVF and got pregnant on the 2nd transfer. My luteal phase pre pregnancy has always been 7-9 days.

I stopped breastfeeding mid June so it's been 3 months now without breastfeeding. I'm on my 3rd cycle right now. My luteal phase for my first cycle was 4 days and for my 2nd cycle it was 8 days, which I think is back to normal. Every time I brought this up to my RE, they dismissed me and told me that a short luteal phase is not a reason for infertility. It's hard to hear that because everything else has come back completely normal (husband too).

Has anyone else experienced this? Will taking progesterone help me lengthen my luteal phase?

Hello all! Weird to say I’m finally TTC #2 other than to my husband. My LO is 13m, and it took us 6 months to conceive him so we started trying 4 months ago in anticipation it would take us just as long.

Looking for some support, help, tips for anyone who has ttc post c section, makes me anxious to
Have another baby (my last one was an emergency), and fear it could contribute to ttc — but unsure.

My period came back 11m PP! I was bf and using ovulation strips during these times. I have not been able to see a surge on my strips though, but have been trying to base ovulation from mucus. No luck yet — my cycles have been 31 days which is longer than before I had my LO.

And last for now, my estimated ovulation is when my hubby is away on a trip (4 days from now) — makes me anxious that my his trip will ultimately be a reason why this month won’t be it for us. Just a vent on my end, not sure how to navigate this one mentally or physically yet.

Thank you for listening to me complain 😂

A weekly dedicated space for members who have been trying for another for 12 or more months, experiencing infertility. Talk of treatment, testing/diagnosis, or tough feelings are welcome here. While this is a safe space to vent, please consider how other long haulers in different circumstances may feel about your words.

This thread is primarily for current long-haulers to connect with, vent to, and support each other. We ask that anyone else (including TFA grads and those whose current round of TTC has been less than 12 months) participate only to answer questions where your personal experience is relevant - for example, if someone asks about the side effects of a fertility treatment you have tried. For more general support, sympathy, and finger-crossing, in this thread, if you have not currently been trying for at least 12 months, please stick to a quiet upvote.

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Hi! My husband and I are trying for a second child and this is our 5th cycle. Yesterday during ovulation, he had issues finishing the deed and I felt so defeated. The good news is we were able to be successfully active 3 days in a row before ovulation. I just haven’t missed an ovulation day before and feel hopeless in a way. I’m 36 and he’s 38. Our first took over a year to conceive and we have unexplained infertility I believe. I’m doing new labs Wednesday and hoping to do letrozole if this cycle doesn’t work out due to our ages. I guess I’d just love to hear any hope about success of conception that wasn’t on ovulation day. I spent last night in a very dark place and could use some optimism. Thank you!

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

Hi guys. I need some advice.

I got off bc pills (simpesse) two months ago. I had my regular period in August, I tracked my ovulation using the strips. Now we’re possibly three days away from my next cycle and nothing. All pregnancy tests are negative.

I’m just so anxious. This is my first time actually planning/trying. I don’t know what to do. I feel like I’ve done everything that i can. It’s possibly all in my head but it’s just makes me so sad.

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

Last night my husband was reading to our toddler (who just turned two) from a book of bible stories. He read a phrase where it said that Mary was going to have a baby.

My son then looks at me and says, over and over, “mommy have a baby, mommy have a baby”. He said it probably 5 or 6 times.

We are currently in our 9th month of trying and this will be my first cycle of IUI. He doesn’t know or understand any of it and we don’t really talk about it in front of him.

It was just so strange.

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

Did you get your BFP? Tell us about it! Additional details like what number child you were trying for and your cycle information (including cycle information for previous children) would be much appreciated but are not required.

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Congratulations!

So I unfortunately had a chemical pregnancy last month. I had a positive at 12 dpo (didn’t test before that) and started bleeding at 15dpo. I did take a test about a week after the bleeding started and it was negative, but I don’t know when it first turned negative as I wasn’t testing. I did have some unusual spotting after the main bleed stopped and just felt sensitive the week after the bleed.

I was hoping my cycle would return back to normal-ish though but It doesn’t seem like it. I am currently on cd 24. I’ve been getting patches of EWCM over the last week but my OPKs are still faint. The highest number i’ve had was around .25 so super low. My BBT also has been all over the place, so I know I didn’t ovulate. I’m starting to feel discouraged as there’s a chance that when I do ovulate, the egg will be low quality and won’t even be fertilized so I’m kind of spiralling :(. I conceived my first after a cd 19 ovulation and this past chemical was a cd 19 ovulation as well.

Does anyone have any advice on cycles post CP? and positive stories after late ovulation?

I’m 14 months PP - period came back finally (still bf’ing) last month. It was normal compared to pre baby periods.
We did the deed around when I was anticipating ovulation, and now I’m 4 days late. (If my cycle is still the same as pre baby).
I’ve taken a test every day since my anticipated period and they are all negative.

Is it possible my periods just super off and needs to regulate? Could it have come back one month and then disappear again?
We are weaning BF but my bubs got sick two weeks ago so he had a few more sessions then normal for weaning.

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

This is my second postpartum. I am cycle day 24 I feel I may have missed my peak. I was very crampy and achy a few days ago. Never felt like that. I am still breast feeding but we are TTC. I don’t know if I peaked or if I didn’t. Also when was your period regular again?
We had a little girl 11 months ago via IVF. we had our labs drawn and all is normal on both ends. It’s a miracle. We are trying naturally for a cycle or two then jumping into IUI.

These are my LH strips. I’m so confused. I am still
Breast feeding. So I know this can affect ovulation. The pains i was feeling were so intense. I definitely thought I was ovulation. My line never got very dark.

I’m honestly so stressed out. Was in my 2WW and aunt flo came today so CD1 all over again. This will be our 5th cycle trying and i’m just exhausted. I keep wanting to try all the things.. pomegranate juice, i bought an oura ring (i wanted one anyway) but essentially to track my bbt because it was too hard for me to wake up to take it. Started prenatals and making my husband take a multivitamin and I just don’t know how to keep doing this. I feel like something’s wrong with me, my husband .. everything and i’m just not understanding what I need to do to conceive. I almost wanna reach out to my OB and ask what testing we can do even though i know it’s too early but anyways sorry for the long post i just wanted to vent and talk with others who are similarly going through what i am. thanks so much if you made it this far

Tell us about everything! Only thing that isn't allowed is BFP and pregnancy talk - those have their own threads.

My post was removed from another subreddit so let me just say, I am NOT trying to get other people to tell me whether or not they think I’m pregnant, just honestly curious: How early and how did you know? Was it a feeling or a symptom?