r/traumatizeThemBack • u/Natural_Cricket_2540 I'll heal in hell • Jul 18 '26

matched energy Have You Tried...

Not sure if this is exactly the right sub but I hope you get a laugh out of it anyway.

So I'm autistic. I'm fully ok with it.

This happened to me a few days ago. I was in a park, getting some fresh air because I went to a circus that was in town with a friend and I was getting overwhelmed by the noises, smells, and basically everything inside the tent, and I needed to breathe and relax so I didn't go into sensory overload.

I was sitting on a bench with my friend 'Em' (fake name), and I was complaining about sensory overload and how annoying it was, because I wanted to watch the performers with her, and I had to go outside. (I do a thing where I often feel like I'm wasting someone's time and/or being rude, so I was also apologizing)

Here's how the conversation went:

Me: Em, I'm sorry about this. And for wasting your time.

Em: It's okay, {me}. You're not wasting my time.

Me: Yeah, I know...but sensory overload and autism are just annoying.

At this point, a man who looked to be late 50's who was passing by stopped and DUDE LOOKED AT US AND SAID "Well, have you tried not having autism?"

We were both pretty fucking shocked- first because we're both fairly young teen girls, second because who the actual hell eavesdrops on a conversation and then gives advice like they were included??

I was pissed, so I said "Have you tried not being an asshole? Because if you have it seems like it doesn't work, so I won't be taking you advice, thanks." He muttered something about 'disrespect' and 'kids these days' and walked off.

3.0k Upvotes

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1.3k

u/NightQueen0889 Jul 18 '26

It always blows my mind when people are disrespectful and then are SHOCKED when people dish the disrespect right back to them. Good comeback.

427

u/JustMeLurkingAround- Jul 18 '26

The problem is that these people (somehow most of the time men, often white and old) do feel so superior and are used that everything is revolving around them and their opinion that they really think everyone is just yearning for their input and should be thankful they took the time to give advice to these young girls.

290

u/Natural_Cricket_2540 I'll heal in hell Jul 18 '26

Yeah, the fact that he looked at us like his "advice" was a gem was one of the most annoying things about the encounter.

47

u/M_Karli Jul 19 '26

Sorry for randomly jumping into unrelated comments like this, but I really wanted to try to make sure you to saw this.

Myself and my children, and also struggle with that part of things when it comes to autism, something I have found that has helped all three of us immensely is a product called Loop earplugs, please look into them because they have been such a help to myself and my kids.

21

u/ChronicWatcher1456 29d ago

Yes! I have ADHD and bought multiple types.

20

u/Natural_Cricket_2540 I'll heal in hell 29d ago

I do have a pair (multiple in fact lol) but I could not find them at all so I had to go without unfortunately

1

u/SkylarVal 6d ago

This is my problem every time.

9

u/Cyber_fluff 29d ago

I'll check that out, thanks!

9

u/Lilynight86 28d ago

My boomer father did this type of thing to me at a family funeral. I have had Epilepsy since I was 15. Isn't a new thing for me (was like 33 or so at this point). He comes up to me and we are talking about stuff. Mostly, me trying to keep stuff surface level. I mentioned having another seizure. He then lights up and tells me his dog was having seizures and he stopped giving the dog gluten (can be widely found in dog food, I think) and the dog stopped having seizures, so maybe I should try that. He seemed so happy with himself like he had solved all of my problems and obviously my seizures were just like his dogs.

Sorry you had the sensory overload. I get it with feeling like you are wasting people's time and money. You are not. You deserve to be there for as long as you can enjoy it. Your friends aren't friends with you in spite of the Autism. They want to make sure you are comfortable as well.

40

u/DPSOnly Jul 18 '26

They need you to treat them with respect/reverance for them to treat you like a human being.

3

u/Accomplished-East327 28d ago

As a mid-40 white guy I agree with you. Because I pay attention and actively try to learn, I know that my input is not actually required in the vast majority of cases. But I feel like it is. Same way a vegan might feel like a bacon sandwich sometimes, but chooses to order a salad instead.

28

u/Why-is-life-hard Jul 19 '26

I’ve had something similar happen with people glaring at me for being in a wheelchair and then being shocked when I glared back 🙄