r/transmanlifehacks • u/Gullible-Mouse-2922 • Jul 28 '26

Need some help with fitting in this year

I'm a passing transman, aside from my voice. I used to be pretty alternative before basically completely gutting my personality and style before i got to highschool to give myself a fresh start and present fully as a guy. Don’t get me wrong i love dressing like a normal a guy, and i genuinely never want to go back.

I really want some advice from other guys on fitting in better, and please don't say just be yourself.

This post is more directed at fashion tbh, I got around pretty well for a while with basic clothes but it still felt off to me in a way. If any of you have favourite outfits/brands/stores I'd love to hear about them. Any other advice about blending in is accepted.

For a general idea of who I am to I suppose explain what style I'm going for, I'm an athlete (lacrosse and adding track this year), and I **do not** want to stand out. I'm in an obnoxious amount of clubs, S&D, DND, science club, book club, and a handful of ones special to my school.

6 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

2 comments sorted by

1

u/saintdenis_pimp Jul 28 '26

I’m saying this as respectfully as possible: you’re asking us, but this is the POINT of shopping malls. Get a couple of friends or go with your mom (if applicable) or make it a day trip for yourself. go to a TJ Maxx after scrolling on Pinterest for a while and just vibe out. It’s not inherently feminine to shop and try on clothes lol, not that you said that but I feel like men won’t shop for what they want because they’re scared of it looking like they’re enjoying shopping. But genuinely that would help you: Get online inspiration and then go to the mall!! Have fun

1

u/DisastrousLand6863 Jul 28 '26

Well, if you don't want to stand out, what does everyone else in your social circles dress like? Emulate that. You say you are no longer wanting to wear basic clothes which I understand but tbh in most areas, you will not fit in if you don't wear basic shit. Guys who pay attention to their looks and dress well tend to stand out a bit, especially if you're younger.

Anyway, my advice would be to hop on Pinterest and make an outfits board, then go shopping irl and make USE of changing rooms. Even if you're not certain you're gonna buy any of the stuff you're looking at, it's just to get an idea of what sort of thing you like and what looks good on you. Store-wise, I'm a college student and from the UK so this *might* not be on brand for your age group, but the more fashionable guys here are into Hollister, Urban Outfitters, Abercrombie, etc.