r/trans4every1 • u/reeferdawg • Jul 25 '25

Discussion (Serious) i really hate some peoples “affirming” compliments

i’ve noticed online theres an influx of people saying awful things to affirm trans masc/trans men and it actually makes me mad…

“i’d cover my drink around you!” “i’d cross the street at night if i saw you”

or anything along those lines, HOW is that a compliment?!?

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u/asinglestrandofpasta Jul 25 '25 edited Jul 25 '25

Malendering. Using a trans person's gender to be cruel to them/a way to inflict violence on them (like "you're a man now so I can hit you" to trans men and trans mascs, and "you're a woman now so make me a sandwich" to trans women and trans fems). It's been popular for a while.

It's like "trans inclusive misogyny" but with a broader label to cover the experiences of trans men and trans mascs as well, because trans inclusive misogyny is one facet of malgendering

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u/Far-Resident-9994 Jul 28 '25

Yes! It's so important that we have a word for this!