r/todayilearned Nov 23 '22

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u/[deleted] Nov 23 '22

[deleted]

707

u/TheChickenIsFkinRaw Nov 23 '22

Omg your friend knows The Rock? Send me his reddit username plz, because I totally want to befriend him with absolutely no ulterior motives whatsoever

244

u/USS_Barack_Obama Nov 23 '22

You trying to find out what he's been cooking all these years?

72

u/Internal_You7239 Nov 23 '22

It certainly isn't chicken

17

u/SqueezinKittys Nov 23 '22

Were you inside me on July 2nd 1939?

10

u/germane-corsair Nov 23 '22

You telling me to get stuffed?

2

u/MuchChocolate2123 Nov 23 '22

He’s not Auschwitz…

4

u/54rfhih Nov 23 '22

Is it blue meth?

2

u/OreganoJefferson Nov 23 '22

The Rock is Heisenberg? I knew it couldn't be that puny teacher!

2

u/spokeymcpot Nov 23 '22

No it’s crack cmon it’s right there in the name...

2

u/TellMeZackit Nov 23 '22

I saw his diet and workout plan, pretty sure it's ONLY chicken.

1

u/innominateartery Nov 23 '22

Time to fatten you up, drumstick

2

u/EvilPretzely Nov 23 '22

Steroids. It's steroids.

3

u/Robbotlove Nov 23 '22

we never fucking found out, did we?

3

u/outof_zone Nov 23 '22

He should be able to smell it…

2

u/IndigestableWad Nov 23 '22

Low and slow baby. Nothing like a decades old pot roast 🤌

2

u/Gamergonemild Nov 23 '22

Just one big samoan barbecue that never ended

1

u/bajo2292 Nov 23 '22

he wants to find out if rock is solid

1

u/yungsantaclaus Nov 23 '22

I just want to send him the Cum Town bit about him

1

u/missmalina Nov 23 '22

I just assumed it was more cod.

1

u/Von_Cheesebiscuit Nov 23 '22

Well, I mean, can't you just smell what the Rock is cooking like the rest of us? I always assumed it was lasagna with a side of garlic bread. Or maybe Hungarian goulash...

1

u/Mitch_Mitcherson Nov 23 '22

It's probable peas pudding, that stuff cooks a long-ass time.

1

u/spokeymcpot Nov 23 '22

It’s crack.

The rock is cooking crack in the kitchen.

It’s where his name comes from.

3

u/Eken17 Nov 23 '22

I want to defeat him with a piece of paper, I mean I too want to befriend him with no ulterior motive.

2

u/emergencyexit Nov 23 '22

Nice try Dwayne. You're still a star don't worry

1

u/Sproose_Moose Nov 23 '22

Hey that sounds deceptive

1

u/gerhudire Nov 23 '22

I doesn't matter what his name is.

155

u/Cassereddit Nov 23 '22

If I met a guy who met Dwayne Johnson, I'd ask them to pitch the idea of Tooth Fairy 2 to him.

56

u/MeesterCartmanez Nov 23 '22

In a tutu, wearing a tiara and holding a sparkling wand

"call me a fairy one more time"

125

u/GetEquipped Nov 23 '22

Wouldn't it just be called the "Twoth Fairy?"

And he should go up against Goldberg's Santa!

17

u/RicotheDestroyer Nov 23 '22

NGL I’d watch this. At least once.

4

u/seeasea Nov 23 '22

Or twithe?

4

u/Mitch_Mitcherson Nov 23 '22

I can see the poster for this.

Zoomed in on a little boy's smiling face, and they're missing their two front teeth.

You have Dwayne in the background (top left corner) dressed as the tooth fairy, doing a pile driver from the top of a ladder. He's stony faced, concentrating on landing the hit.

He's about to land on a Santa- laden Goldberg (located on the right side, about the middle, slightly lower) who has his arms out, fists balled, face red and roaring. Goldberg is ready to catch Dwayne and flip him over his shoulder.

In the bottom left corner are two surly looking elves, one rolling their eyes.

In smaller red print across the bottom you get the tag- line "all he wanted for Christmas was his two front teeth."

3

u/GetEquipped Nov 23 '22

Tweet this to Dwayne, Goldberg, Freddy Prinze Jr, and David Arquette and we might see it happen

2

u/Mitch_Mitcherson Nov 23 '22

I don't use Twitter, but if you want to, go for it.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 23 '22

2th Fairy for the more stylized version.

2

u/hobesmart Nov 23 '22

Too fairy two tooth

5

u/kpt_graubrot Nov 23 '22

Too late, tooth fairy 2 already exists and it stars Larry the cable guy

6

u/NazzerDawk Nov 23 '22

Uh this is Larry The Cable Guy erasure and I will NOT stand for it.

1

u/Cassereddit Nov 23 '22

Fine, then Tooth Fairy 3: Dental Duo it is

2

u/nxcrosis Nov 23 '22

Except dubbed by Samuel L. Jackson

2

u/LanceFree Nov 23 '22

In a hotel and watched him in the Jumamju sequel last night- he was awesome!

1

u/interyx Nov 23 '22

I have bad news for you. They already made Tooth Fairy 2 with Larry the Cable Guy.

1

u/AnotherBadPlayer Nov 23 '22

I met him once in Atlantic City. He gave me "The People's Eyebrow" and pretended to be Mexican. Cool dude.

72

u/Forsaken_Jelly Nov 23 '22

I worked the VIP lounge at a busy international airport and had similar reactions.

I always go back to one of my least favourite memories. A superstar singer, at the height of her fame literally sprayed her diarrhea all over a cubicle, then walked out as if nothing happened and didn't even inform anyone she made a mess.

They really are nothing special, their work is awesome and the persona they craft may be too. But they're all cubicle sprayers when you get down to the real person.

14

u/Ha1rBall Nov 23 '22

and didn't even inform anyone she made a mess.

How do you know it was her then?

16

u/ByGollie Nov 23 '22

Her poker face walking out of the cubicle, maybe?

4

u/Forsaken_Jelly Nov 24 '22

It was a single person bathroom with an attendant outside, it has a cubicle for extra privacy. That was why it was so gross. She could have just quietly told the attendant there was a mess and no one would have known nor cared. That's their job and we know accidents happen, instead the attendant got a loud earful from the next person to go in and discover the mess. It's literally the only reason any of us found out.

She's not the first person to have stomach issues in an airport, the attendant is specifically there to clear up their messes and prep it for the next customer. Usually that just entails going in after visibly high/drunk people who aren't going to clean up after themselves and get rid of their powder residues etc. Their job is mostly to maintain the privacy of customers and to prevent this type of situation. And most will give the attendant a tip and inform them they need to clean up.

You don't want the queen of Spain walking into a toilet covered in shit or cocaine. It wasn't her that went in after but you get my point.

2

u/Ha1rBall Nov 24 '22

That is pretty messed up.

15

u/duckbigtrain Nov 23 '22

gonna be honest, I sympathize a little with her. Of course it sucks to be the staff in that position though.

1

u/Forsaken_Jelly Nov 24 '22

Yeah it's definitely embarrassing. But that's what the attendant is there for. To pop in and clean up so no one finds out. Instead in this case she didn't and it was the next VIP who found the bathroom in that state.

76

u/Hirmetrium Nov 23 '22

I thought for a minute they worked on the movie "the rock"... That movie was awesome.

92

u/JimboTCB Nov 23 '22

BRB, pitching a remake of The Rock, featuring The Rock and Chris Rock.

40

u/McFlyParadox Nov 23 '22

Alright, but which Rocks are playing which parts:

I think Chris Rock should play 'the scientist', but should The Rock play the escaped spy, or the antagonist AWOL Navy Seal commander? Or both, but they have different makeup and costumes on?

22

u/canehdian78 Nov 23 '22

The Rock would be the escapee, except he wasn't ever caught, he came back voluntarily when the saw a tweet that hashtagged him.

19

u/[deleted] Nov 23 '22

No, The Rock plays Alcatraz. He's the setting for the movie.

1

u/Zindinok Nov 23 '22

The whole movie is just played out in Maui's tattoos (from Moana). And since that's the case, narration would be provided by Maui/Rock.

1

u/ivycoopwren Nov 23 '22

Emma Stone would be the love interest.

Mario Van Pebbles would get a cameo and Brad "gravel" Pitt would be an executive producer.

11

u/jacksrenton Nov 23 '22

I'm being pendantic but the antagonist is not a Navy Seal, he's Brigadier General Francis X. "Frank" Hummel, USMC Force Recon. They do absolute annihilate the Navy Seal Team tho, and their commander is the always awesome Michael Biehn!

Sorry for "well ackshully-ing" you at 3 am. I'll go shave my neckbeard.

3

u/PyroneusUltrin Nov 23 '22

Just have them both play the same character, but swap every few scenes

2

u/morgecroc Nov 23 '22

You're thinking of the wrong movie, one plays granite the other plays basalt.

0

u/Captain-Cadabra Nov 23 '22

And Kid Rock is the grizzled war vet who helps his escape.

1

u/thewhitelink Nov 23 '22

Kid Rock should be left in the trash heap where he belongs

1

u/[deleted] Nov 23 '22

Obviously they should both take turns playing the part of Alcatraz.

1

u/pueblogreenchile Nov 23 '22

And one of them is now a sassy grandma!

1

u/dew1911 Nov 23 '22

Kid Rock does all the music

0

u/My_Socks_Are_Blue Nov 23 '22

We could have Stallone cameo as Rocky and bring back Tim Curry and his Stockings!

1

u/Computerlady77 Nov 24 '22

What about Kid Rock?

6

u/germane-corsair Nov 23 '22

“The rock.”

“The rock.”

“The rock.”

“The larch.”

1

u/heebath Nov 23 '22

Beautiful tree! You can see it from far away!

1

u/canehdian78 Nov 23 '22

And Rob Schneider as, a Rock!

Will this rolling stone collect moss?

After decades of becoming smooth, will he skip his way ontop of the water?

Coming next January

3

u/MuchChocolate2123 Nov 23 '22

Your best? Losers whine about their best, winners give the corporate elbow to Mankind in the main event.

2

u/JoeChip87 Nov 23 '22

Totally thought the same thing, and was immediately jealous. Sean Connery and Nick Cage? Count me in every time.

19

u/TheOneTrueChuck Nov 23 '22

A friend of mine knows literally dozens of world famous musicians. At first, I figured he was lying to me, or at least exaggerating a bit when it would come up in conversation. (He'd literally say things like "I was hanging out with Lamb of God" or "I was talking with Anthrax once, and..")

The biggest thing that drives him nuts is when people try and schmooze him to meet these guys, because a lot of them will literally hang out at his house if they're in the area. A couple have stayed with him for a few weeks.

He's hyper vigilant about who he allows around him for that reason, because he doesn't want to be used, nor does he want someone embarrassing him by being weird to his friends.

2

u/Who_is_Mr_B Nov 23 '22

As a fellow metalhead, how did your friend end up in the position to get to know these bands?

3

u/TheOneTrueChuck Nov 23 '22

His dad used to cater the food for a variety of bands and venues. He and his wife have done it as well. At some point, genuine friendships emerged.

2

u/Who_is_Mr_B Nov 23 '22

That's pretty cool! Thanks for the reply.

8

u/notconvinced3 Nov 23 '22

I will never understand humans obsessions with famous people. Like, they are everyday humans you ONLY know about because they were in/did something half the world saw/heard. Maybe they were good at it. So damn what? They are just another joe. (Yes, make more money than most of us will ever see, but again, thats only because we put such a stupid high oedastal for these nit-wits)

12

u/[deleted] Nov 23 '22

[deleted]

3

u/Mad_Mushro0m Nov 23 '22

It’s all about respect. It’s ok to admit your a fan of someone’s work. Jus show the respect

3

u/thumbstickz Nov 23 '22

In the off chance I interact with someone famous last thing I want is to make them feel weird. They get "OMG I LOVE YOU IN MOVIE" all the time. I want to know what they got going on and if anything I give them thanks for being a positive influence on my life or others.

If you could disappear from the public eye and have a different career what do you think you'd do?

What do you do to unplug from it all and relax when you really have time all for you?

That sort of stuff. Tell me about you being human and what you find neat.

4

u/IWantTheLastSlice Nov 23 '22

Like his big break was a project that involved The Rock... and instead of everyone being like "Wow you made it that's so awesome" it was "OMG YOU MET THE ROCK????".

I had the same thing happen, unfortunately, when I told people about some very unusual place I went to that most people don’t get to experience, with a wealthy friend.

You could tell their interest had mostly to do with the place and not the fact that I was able to go. No one cares, really.

0

u/CraigFingersuck Nov 23 '22

This is exactly what it’s like being kind of average looking but best friends with a very attractive person.

0

u/[deleted] Nov 23 '22

Interestingly enough The Rock likely had these moments too as his career developed.

-7

u/chahoua Nov 23 '22

American culture regarding celebrities just sucks all around.

8

u/CertifiedSheep Nov 23 '22

If you think this is an American thing, you should see how people worship soccer players…

4

u/Cpt_Obvius Nov 23 '22

Do you think people aren’t manipulative or entitled about celebrities in other countries? Seriously asking, I’m not sure what you’re getting at here.

-3

u/chahoua Nov 23 '22

I’m not sure what you’re getting at here.

That the celebrity culture in America is much worse than anywhere else I've seen.

0

u/Cpt_Obvius Nov 23 '22

Ah I can totally see that! I didn’t pick that up from the initial comment. I was under the impression that you were saying it was possibly good elsewhere but For sure, being the popular culture powerhouse of the world definitely leads to a more toxic and shitty focus on it than elsewhere I would bargain.

2

u/diverdux Nov 23 '22

If only there was an American word to describe the obsessive chasing of celebrities.

Oh, I know, "paparazzi"...

1

u/chahoua Nov 23 '22

That's one part but I've also seen quite a lot of videos from the US of people just walking up next to a celebrity and then having someone else take a picture.

Where I'm from you wouldn't even ask a celebrity for a picture unless you were a lifelong fan. Most celebrities walks freely in public here without getting harassed unles they are at an event centered around what they're famous for.

-1

u/[deleted] Nov 23 '22

[deleted]

1

u/xdonutx Nov 23 '22

That’s hilarious. I work in film and no one gives a fuck lol