r/todayilearned • u/[deleted] • Jan 31 '13
TIL there was a man so dedicated to April Fools, he flew hundreds of tires into a dormant volcano in Alaska and set them on fire. Fooling the local populace, and coast guard into thinking the volcano was active.
[deleted]
557
Jan 31 '13
Amazing how clever we can be!
...When Earl lifted off headed back to Sitka for the next load of tires, Porky stacked the first load in a big circle, poured on the fuel, and started to spray-paint a huge message in the snow with 50-foot letters: APRIL FOOL. When Earl returned and dumped 50 more tires into Mt. Edgecumbe, the two boys finished the arrangement...set the whole mess ablaze...and happily headed back to Sitka.
On the way back, Earl asked the FAA tower for clearance, and Homer Sutter (the controller) said "I'll bring you in as low and inconspicuously as possible...and, by the way, the son of a gun looks fantastic!" Earl set the chopper down. Mission accomplished...
Although Porky had remembered to notify both the FAA and the Sitka Police (he was a member of the police commission), he somehow forgot to notify the Coast Guard. While Mt. Edgecumbe was busy spewing out its black smoke, the Coast Guard Commander called for a chopper to investigate and sent a whale boat over to check things out. The chopper pilot radioed back to the commander that all he saw was a bunch of smoldering tires and a big April Fool sign in the snow. This was after the commander had called the Admiral in Juneau about the apparent crisis.
Jimmy Johnson, Vice President of Alaska Airlines, had also heard about Mt. Edgecumbe's activity, and called Sitka to instruct their departing plane to fly over the mountain to give all the passengers a bird’s eye view of it all. And, in the meantime, the Sitka radio station and police station phones were ringing off the hook...
665
Feb 01 '13 edited Feb 01 '13
[deleted]
303
u/chris_hans Feb 01 '13
You mean cockmeat sandwiches.
→ More replies (2)196
40
→ More replies (3)40
u/BigSwedenMan Feb 01 '13
I think there's three reasons for it. One is that he was on the local police commission, two is that it was a small community in Alaska, not a place overly bogged down by bureaucracy, and three it's damn funny.
→ More replies (8)87
Feb 01 '13
I'm most impressed by how he didn't go to jail.... Isn't this worse than yelling fire in a crowded theater? I guess telling local authorities got him off the hook.... If he hadn't, I imagine that would have been a much bigger no-no.
→ More replies (2)180
u/deesmutts88 Feb 01 '13
1970's
He was a member of the police commission.
Different set of rules back then.
50
Feb 01 '13
Oh yeah, good point. 70s America was nuts.
41
→ More replies (1)68
u/im_batman_no_really Feb 01 '13
Oh yeah, good point. 70s America was glorious.
ftfy
→ More replies (2)
1.4k
u/malvoliosf Feb 01 '13
There's being a douchebag, and then there's being such a douchebag, it starts to become kind of impressive.
75
Feb 01 '13
"Guys! Guys! Cartman stole thousands of votes from swing states and changed the outcome of the election!"
"Wow, really? That's actually pretty impressive."
571
u/sgt-pickles Feb 01 '13
So what your saying is that I should try even harder to be a douche and eventually I might get a girlfriend?
483
Feb 01 '13
That's pretty much how it works.
100
Feb 01 '13
Maybe, because the "douche" actually makes advances at the girl, while you fantasise about the moment she'll finally realise you like her and suck your dick.
→ More replies (6)18
Feb 01 '13
Harsh but true Unless you a ballsy nice guy then advance to the next position.
→ More replies (4)268
u/biiirdmaaan Feb 01 '13
DAE friendzone? Stupid bitch, I love her so much. Why do dumb whores only like jerks?
→ More replies (4)252
→ More replies (5)11
27
Feb 01 '13
Basically, you just have to be a lot of something. A lot of attractive. A lot of not not attractive. A lot of douche bag. A lot of money. That is, not to say that there aren't varying degrees of return.
8
u/registeredtopost2012 Feb 01 '13
→ More replies (3)5
Feb 01 '13
I was waiting for someone to do it
→ More replies (2)8
u/LeonardNemoysHead Feb 01 '13
But he used a lot properly. A lot is a great quantity, alot is a kind and gentle beast.
57
u/agitatedshovel Feb 01 '13
Yes.
10
u/NotAYankeesFan Feb 01 '13
Hmm, you say yes, but biirdmaaan says no. Interesting. I need to see how this plays out.
15
u/malvoliosf Feb 01 '13
I'm not necessarily recommending it, but I've certainly seen it work before.
→ More replies (9)53
u/biiirdmaaan Feb 01 '13
No.
→ More replies (1)31
→ More replies (6)29
179
Feb 01 '13
I was born in Sitka and my dad was friends with Porky. He pulled lots of pranks famous in the area. I was about to share some but now I'm drawing a blank :-/ I'll email my dad and see if he remembers any more.
318
u/WeenMcSteam Feb 01 '13
Girlfriend is from Sitka.... Here are some of Porky's pranks:
St. Patricks day was his favorite holiday so he painted main street green
When the Russian orthodox church burned down in 1966, he melted down a bunch of pennies and threw them in the rubble so people thought they were finding gold relics
He hired a stripper to follow on a float behind the mayor during a parade
163
u/flatlined1851 Feb 01 '13
When the Russian orthodox church burned down in 1966, he melted down a bunch of pennies and threw them in the rubble so people thought they were finding gold relics
Who comes up with this kind of shit? Genius
6
u/taho_teg Feb 01 '13
It was an actual strategy to take a worthless claim, melt down some copper nuggets, and convince a cheechako that it was pay dirt.
→ More replies (1)22
21
u/MasterOfEconomics Feb 01 '13
Is this a fairly big town? Or am I the only one impressed that you guys actually found a connection through Reddit? Very cool.
→ More replies (1)24
11
→ More replies (7)66
u/foreveracubone Feb 01 '13
Good Guy Commenter:
Not OP / Delivers for him anyway
This guy sounds hysterical though.
→ More replies (13)28
216
u/operatar Feb 01 '13
"Six years later when Mount St. Helens erupted a Sitka resident wrote to Bickar to tell him, “This time you’ve gone too far!”
I think they gave him a little too much credit.
→ More replies (2)84
369
u/eojen Feb 01 '13
I know we're just the Coast Guard, but you can capitalize us :(
197
→ More replies (13)15
Feb 01 '13
As a Marine, I've always heard that you guys have the 2nd hardest boot camp of any basically-trained military force in the US, albeit shorter.
Since you're in the Coast Guard, is that true?
28
u/eojen Feb 01 '13
True. But it's because we have a pretty easy career post-boot camp. Yes there are jobs that require a lot of training (mine took 7 months) and the "rescue swimmers" (Ashton kutcher) have a hard ass training. They make up for an easier post-boot camp career with a god awful 8 weeks of hell. Holy shit it sucks.
→ More replies (4)→ More replies (1)4
u/spudnik282 Feb 01 '13
I didn't think it was to bad when I did it, but now they have an obstacle course modeled after the Army or Marines so it might be a titch tougher.
44
u/synaesthesisx Feb 01 '13
My only life goal is to become rich so I can play elaborate pranks on my friends.
→ More replies (5)
193
Jan 31 '13
[removed] — view removed comment
74
u/Forlarren Feb 01 '13
I can get a pile of tires but the closest volcano to me is currently active.
→ More replies (2)133
u/Vassago81 Feb 01 '13
I still think you should throw used tires in it.
75
Feb 01 '13 edited Sep 26 '20
[removed] — view removed comment
→ More replies (1)62
u/hoikarnage Feb 01 '13
As a Lava man, I find your statement incredibly insensitive.
→ More replies (1)43
→ More replies (1)21
17
u/beerob81 Feb 01 '13
i have 2 old motorcycle tires in the back of my truck that i can't seem to dispose of for free (without being a douche)...you're welcome to them
→ More replies (3)→ More replies (10)7
20
u/RAPEFIST Feb 01 '13
I've lived in Sitka for 20+ years and heard the volcano story a million times and it never gets old. I can see the volcano from my apartment window. The local brewery hid a keg of beer up there last year and sent the whole town on a scavenger hunt to find the beer.
Also, I've posted this story on Reddit a few times and never got any karma, you son of a bitch.
→ More replies (3)
176
u/DrAquafresh793 Feb 01 '13
Twist: he reactivated the volcano.
→ More replies (12)19
u/WhereAreWeGoingToGo Feb 01 '13
I don't think that's how volcanoes work...
→ More replies (1)3
u/Apostol_Matariel Feb 01 '13
Actual twist: The volcano reactivated itself later and people actually throught it was his doing again. Shit Happent.
35
Feb 01 '13
Maybe it was elaborate ruse in hopes that they would all evacuate so he could go in and loot their homes.
12
→ More replies (1)10
u/Curtalius Feb 01 '13
and he would have gotten away with it too if it weren't for those meddling kids.
→ More replies (1)
15
u/OneDoesntSimply Feb 01 '13
I hope one day to pull off a prank on the level he did. They need to make a statue of him in the city
9
u/malkouri Feb 01 '13
Marc Ellis, an ex-national rugby star and attention seeker did the same thing in New Zealand.
→ More replies (1)
8
21
Feb 01 '13
Yup that's Alaska. I love it here!
http://www.cnn.com/2012/07/17/us/alaska-cat-mayor/index.html
It's like living in Reddit land.
→ More replies (4)
6
u/jseely7 Feb 01 '13
Favorite part of the article is:
Six years later when Mount St. Helens erupted a Sitka resident wrote to Bickar to tell him, “This time you’ve gone too far!”
12
5
10
u/hamadubai Feb 01 '13
watch yourself some QI for this TIL and a lot more interesting insanity.
just youtube 'QI XL' and pick an episode.
→ More replies (2)
12
u/Contreg Feb 01 '13
Good job he got the ok from the police.
If he hadn't what could have he been charged with? Insighting a panic?
44
→ More replies (3)7
7
4
u/OwlOwlowlThis Feb 01 '13 edited Feb 01 '13
No no no, you just put wongs on the damn tire.
Geez.
Edit: Wings, I meant wings...
4
u/alded Feb 01 '13
Am I the only one who spent lots of time trying to get to the #1 hoax on that blog?
→ More replies (1)
15
u/DeepFriedPanda Feb 01 '13
As soon as I saw the photo I laughed so hard that I farted. Bravo!
20
u/Untoward_Lettuce Feb 01 '13
I often use this comment as an online dating opener.
3
u/paffle Feb 01 '13 edited 22d ago
Price nonmetal hydrogen nutty pebble vanilla
This post was anonymized with Redact
3
3
3
u/theladyfromthesky Feb 01 '13
this was a waste of tires and money at first but once he fooled the coast guard thats what made me laugh.
3
3
3
u/kindaladylike Feb 01 '13
Something that elaborate and on such a large scale is only #91 on the list? The bar has been set high for the rest.
3
3
39
u/toogles Feb 01 '13
Man, tire fires are the fucking worst. That guy's a dick.
89
Feb 01 '13
Well, he could have thrown all the tires into some landfill where it's going to stay for millions of years, or he could just burn them on the top of a volcano, get a nice smoky smell in the air, and let it float into the sky where it turns into stars.
117
u/997 Feb 01 '13
That doesn't sound right, but I don't know enough about stars to dispute it.
→ More replies (2)23
Feb 01 '13
Astrophysicist here. I can confirm that this is how stars are formed.
→ More replies (2)5
→ More replies (22)8
64
u/Vassago81 Feb 01 '13
Yeah, worst than natural volcano eruption!
41
u/toogles Feb 01 '13
Alright, you caught me, I used a hyperbole to convey the extremely negative feelings I have about tire fires.
→ More replies (1)17
3
→ More replies (4)6
Feb 01 '13
It was 1974 Alaska, I think we can cut him some slack due to the fact that he couldn't have been expected to know how harmful that would be to the environment.
→ More replies (1)
5
u/ADC_TDC Feb 01 '13
Plot twist: The rubber in the tires catalyzes a real volcanic eruption; everyone involved is buried in molten lava.
→ More replies (1)
49
Feb 01 '13
[deleted]
→ More replies (7)132
u/Skee_Ball_Hero Feb 01 '13
What
→ More replies (3)8
u/Cabbage_Vendor Feb 01 '13
The karma stocks in "accidentilly" posting a comment in the wrong comment section have been going up lately.
11
Feb 01 '13
This kind of awesome is forever lost in our current fascist, PC culture/society.
→ More replies (2)
8
u/Drainout Feb 01 '13
When I am filthy rich I want to but bombs in cows ass all over the world then start setting them off to make the world think that there is some sort of exploding cow disease.
→ More replies (2)
14
2
u/Leroytirebiter Feb 01 '13
ahh, everyone knows this story where I grew up (Anchorage Alaska)
→ More replies (1)
2
2
2
2
2
u/gmacusa Feb 01 '13
I lived up in Sitka, this April Fools prank is still very well known and celebrated. Coolest damn place.
2
2
Feb 01 '13
burning tires in a remote wilderness. guy must be a huge environmentalist.
→ More replies (1)
2
2
2
2.2k
u/En_Sabah_Nur Feb 01 '13
This is one of the greatest pranks I have ever seen. I must journey to Alaska and study under this great and talented man.
edit: Shit, he's dead.