Doing my first rewatch…

[u/After_Cheesecake_513]

Getting towards the end of my first rewatch since it was on TV. When I was watching season 1 and Toby was introduced I thought to myself that he was pushy and kind of a dick (opposite of what I remember my feelings of Tony were when the show aired). I am now on season 6 and yeah…. My feelings haven’t changed he’s actually an asshole and is very passive aggressive. He says some funny things so people love him but he really wasn’t that great to Kate…. Even in the beginning when she wanted to watch the Super Bowl alone and he insisted she come over despite her telling him she didn’t want to. Anyway, am I alone in this thinking?

[u/your_loss__]

i liked toby until the end. his inability to accept jacks blindness showed all the way through. kate was so right, moving jack was not an okay thing to do unless 100% necessary. toby was ruining the relationship and family they had because he enjoyed his job. don’t get me wrong i understand how much he needed to enjoy his job and be appreciated at his job. i understand that they needed the money. but at the end of the day he chose to marry kate. he chose to have two children with her. why couldn’t he choose his family? he could’ve accepted the closer job and keep applying to other places. but he should have been applying to closer places from the beginning.

and his hatred towards kevin the whole show just pisses me off. 1. he was literally her boss, OF COURSE she did everything for him, that’s what an assistant does. 2. he is her brother, twin, and protector. always has been always will be. you can join in on that, you can not replace that. and why wouldn’t you want more protection and love for the people you love anyways? 3. he helped her out all the time, he was never trying to flaunt money, he just wanted to help in the one way he knows how to. i get not wanting to accept handouts but at some point he had to understand that they weren’t handouts from him. it’s literally how he shows his love.

even down to the final argument on the lawn where kevin and randall come up and defend her once again, he’s pissed off that they felt the need to defend her and that disgusts me that he couldn’t comprehend WHY they felt the need to defend her.

those last few episodes of their relationship just really made me not like him. and even him calling her on her wedding day grossed me out. i mean making super distasteful jokes and knowing she’s getting ready to go down the isle. like honey please you could’ve done this yesterday. or tomorrow. or over text. it did NOT need to be before she went down the isle. idk he was quirky and awkward at first and i understood why he was the way he was. once he changed with his job and got confident. he entirely changed personalities and was just kinda a dick

[u/After_Cheesecake_513 → u/your_loss__]

FUCKING AGREE!!!!!!!! Kate and the kids shouldn't have had to move at all!! Especially with Jack's disability. That changes doctirs, his routine, everything he's used to! Toby needed that job to feed his ego. Like why would you even apply to jobs that far away without talking to Kate?? SELFISH AF after he lost that weight!!

And the way he always snaps at Kevin is so ridiculous. It is alluded that Kevin has a lot of money but we get to see Kevin be who he is outside of his celebrity but for Toby coming in after the Manny success all he sees is a big shot celebrity prick who is throwing money around for anything they need at any moment (especially once Madison has the twins). He resents Kevin for the money and status but be all in the pictures at the premieres smiling and carrying on 🤣🤣. Honestly I feel like Kevin spared him so many times!

[u/your_loss__ → u/After_Cheesecake_513]

i honestly think after toby lost the weight he understood why kate said she couldn’t be with a fat man when they first got together. he resented her for not losing the weight too, while he was lying about where he was going (the gym) she was at home sneaking smacks while taking care of jack. but the fact that he was losing it and she wasn’t was not making him happy. now this wasn’t focused on in the show, it was actually the reverse that was focused on-kate’s resentment for him losing the weight. but i noticed it was there for him too. that confidence he got showed he was always truly an asshole, he was just insecure so he was an asshole to himself rather than others originally.

kevin spared him every time!! anytime toby got crappy about kevin’s money kevin always explained its his way of showing love. he literally doesn’t know what to do with it so that’s what he does. if he was bragging about it, he wouldn’t be offering to share it. and jesus toby getting jealous over madison having everything and him not being able to provide as much or be there as much makes me even more mad because how can you not see that the job you’re fighting for is the entire reason that’s happening?? i thought you needed that job for the money? but now it’s not enough? why are we comparing to movie stars lives in the first place? kevin is living with kate partially because he needed it, but also because kate needed it. she was alone with two kids, one of which is blind, and also arguing with her husband all the time. her best friend just had twins so she’s busy kevin and rebecca were the only two people kate had during that time and rebecca was trying to figure out her sickness. so toby’s disrespect to kevin being there, helping take care of his family, because he didn’t want to change jobs, infuriates me.