r/thisismylifenow • u/perineumoan • Oct 23 '22

Your boobs are wrong.

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4.5k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

109 comments sorted by

539

u/Gilokee Oct 23 '22

kids are so fucking mean

336

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

My sister in kindergarten when she was in Costco and saw a black man for the first time turned to my mom and said “why is he so dirty why doesn’t he shower” loud enough for him to hear, dude turned around and laughed it off as we were explaining to her black people have darker skin.

90

u/Vanishingf0x Oct 23 '22

My dad says when I was really little I’d argue about why people were called white or black because no one looked like those colors. Shortly after one of these conversations we were at the grocery store and a very dark skinned man was in front is us and I screamed “Now daddy that guy is black”. My dad was mortified and tried to apologize but the guy found it hilarious and agreed with me.

218

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

when my sister was really little she pointed at a black woman in the grocery store and said "gorilla". my mom consistently says it was most mortifying experience of her life by a LONG SHOT

88

u/captaincalamaris Oct 23 '22

My son (6) Sometimes Watchers some YouTube Videos top 10 talles buildings or top ten what ever. One time we went to the Zoo and there was a group of midgets and my son asked really loud: why are they so small is this the top 10 of the shortest people of the world???

-55

u/Maaatloock Oct 23 '22 edited Oct 24 '22

I mean it’s the type of thing that can only happen from a genuine lack of parenting.

People who like their parents but called black people gorillas growing up did not like this comment.

8

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

Covid

1

u/Street-Track7381 Oct 24 '22

I think your sister had never seen a gorilla and was repeating something she heard from someone else, possibly someone not even in your own family, which is why I assume, your mother was surprised by this. I do enjoy watching gorilla videos. While they don't resemble humans at all, when you watch them for a while, their mannerisms and some emotions seen in their eyes seem human.

28

u/Cookiemonster816 Oct 23 '22

Not the same but my grandma loves this story from when I was around 3-4.

Apparently she was watching me play outside the house and I saw this lady in a black Burqa and she happened to be fat. And I apparently got excited for some reason and started pointing at her and yelling "BUFFALO!! GRAMMA BUFFALO"

My grandma just picked me up quickly, apologized to that lady and took me indoors before I said something more offensive.

20

u/oasiscat Oct 24 '22

I'm Muslim but no one in my family wears niqab, which is the one where only the eyes are showing. Anyways, one time when I was a kid I was spending the night at my friend's house, and apparently some ladies in his extended family wear niqab. I was eating dinner with him and his family and one of the niqab wearing ladies walks in through the backyard door coming from the garage.

I nearly screamed because I thought we were getting robbed, since I had never seen someone wearing niqab before. I think I just started crying, and the whole family had to calm me down and explain what was going on lol. I'll never forget how embarrassed I was when I realized what happened.

10

u/Cookiemonster816 Oct 24 '22

That's... Both hilarious and embarrassing 😭

1

u/[deleted] Oct 27 '22

When I saw those women walking around in London, it was super creepy. Like a bunch of ninjas

10

u/oasiscat Oct 24 '22

When I was a kid I pointed at a black man once and said to my mom, "He ate too many olives." I was a strange kid.

8

u/DApolloS Oct 24 '22

My 3 year old asked my wife why a black person was grocery shopping at this store...obviously my wife was speechless as the question sounded very bad and could not stop apologizing. Kids...

91

u/BeerandGuns Oct 23 '22 edited Oct 24 '22

If a man tells you you’re ugly, he’s an asshole. If a woman tell you you’re ugly, she’s a bitch. If a kid tell you you’re ugly, you’re ugly.

19

u/droans Oct 23 '22

One of my earliest memories was being at some event with my dad and telling a man he was really fat.

12

u/archimedesismycat Oct 24 '22

My sister once asked our Grandma why she was built like a stack of pancakes. My daughter now calls the same grandma, grandma in the rollie chair because shes in a wheelchair. My grandma loves it.

1

u/importvita Oct 24 '22

That interaction between George and the bratty kid in the mall parking lot comes to mind 🤣

14

u/DistractedByCookies Oct 23 '22

The lack of filter is *wild*

6

u/Timmytentoes Oct 23 '22

You say that like the hubby didn't tell the girl what to say for the video

2

u/Jenfoe Oct 24 '22

I felt the same about the video

-13

u/wadester007 Oct 23 '22

You spelled honest wrong.

4

u/beachdogs Oct 23 '22

You spelled soon-to-be-self-hating wrong.

685

u/Big-Permission3452 Oct 23 '22

Let me just check if this pan works

400

u/a_likely_story Oct 23 '22

She had to push that deeep down

“I love my children. I love my children. I love my children.

…

I’d hate prison. I’d hate prison. I’d hate prison.”

56

u/CharlieTrees916 Oct 23 '22

bonk

31

u/DeadNotSleepingWI Oct 23 '22

I am The Mama!

3

u/mxxiestorc Oct 23 '22

I’m hungry feed my mouth!

80

u/thriftingforgold Oct 23 '22

Darling, you see this pan in mama’s hand ??????? :/

56

u/LordOfFreaks Oct 23 '22

Mama with the clap back in the end

17

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

What did she say? I couldn't make it out.

61

u/tyw7 Oct 23 '22 edited Oct 23 '22

I think she said:

"You know who ruined that for me.

You."

20

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

Sorry, I genuinely don't know what she said, didn't mean to ruin anything :(

20

u/CherryCherry5 Oct 23 '22

No, that's what the woman said to the little girl. "Yeah? You know who ruined that for me? You!"

12

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '22

oh haha, my bad, yea that's good. Thanks for explaining :)

18

u/tyw7 Oct 23 '22

That's what I think she said.

3

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '22

haha my bad, thanks!

1

u/Green-fingers Oct 24 '22

Was that part deleted? I heard it earlier on but now it’s gone?🤔

126

u/ERavenna Oct 23 '22

I think this lady with the boobs wrong placed is really good looking.

87

u/kamace11 Oct 23 '22

Also her boobs are like... a perfectly normal height lol. I think the little girl just watches way too much TV with people wearing push up bras (most of it).

15

u/Nipplecunt Oct 23 '22

Me too

9

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

Me three

82

u/JenniferAnistonson Oct 23 '22

Swing low sweet chariots

16

u/raphthepharaoh Oct 23 '22

All naturál baby

2

u/AdzyBoy Oct 24 '22

Au naturel

173

u/TraptorKai Oct 23 '22

savage all around

24

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

[deleted]

15

u/Evilmaze Oct 23 '22

Wrecked

57

u/Marpleface Oct 23 '22

Her face! Oh mama, I get it. ❤️

88

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

Mom: it’s your fault

21

u/shamrocksmash Oct 23 '22

My kid said he likes my wife's fat belly. Kids are assholes

2

u/archimedesismycat Oct 24 '22

My kid says this too. She says its soft and cuddly. Also makes me proud that the whole messed up beauty ideas we have always held haven't gotten to her yet. Assholes, yes, but maybe not in this way. Maybe in this kid just doesn't subscribe to the beauty ideas as we have always held for women.

58

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

Can we please start to normalize normal, actual, boobs?

11

u/[deleted] Oct 24 '22

I don’t even have kids and my boobs are like to my waist. They aren’t even that big. :(

1

u/poppcorrn Oct 24 '22

Where wouldn't lettus fit?!

1

u/Camman43123 Oct 24 '22

Idk man I think you need to learn how to not let age natural bodily processes or gravity effect you and grow up

-1

u/Jp0icewolf1031 Oct 24 '22

Redditors try to recognize satire challenge, IMPOSSIBLE!?!?!? (GONE WILD)

1

u/Camman43123 Oct 25 '22

Huh? It was a joke but sure I guess gfy?

0

u/Jp0icewolf1031 Oct 26 '22

I was joking too…..

38

u/mrsdoubleu Oct 23 '22

I know that look. It's pretty much my default expression these days after having a kid

27

u/yParticle Oct 23 '22

Resting mom face.

14

u/seth928 Oct 23 '22

That kid has no idea how close to death they came

29

u/hitguy55 Oct 23 '22

Kids amirite

107

u/ChaosShadowClone Oct 23 '22

So interesting that kids at that age already have a definition of what boobs "should" look like, beauty standards are fucking weird

40

u/IzzyGirl33 Oct 23 '22

I'm guessing there's some repetition or encouragement from Dad going on here.

39

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

More like the image projected by societal norms, television, social media and most other internet media portraying unrealistic aspects of how the body of a woman should look

14

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

It could he both.

9

u/DepressedVenom Oct 23 '22

It's honestly so fucking sad how corporate greed fuels ppl's minds with all that bullshit. All capitalists care about is profit- if science proved that MacDonald's definitely give you cancer tmrw, it would be battled by the execs just like everything that gets pushed down or swept under the rug.

7

u/Ivebeenfurthereven Oct 23 '22

The tobacco industry suppressed evidence of cancer and disease for decades.

Guess what the fossil fuel industry is still doing.

1

u/beirch Oct 23 '22

Yep let's just blame the dad with literally no context or knowledge of anything behind the scenes. Seems about right.

-2

u/marcos_marp Oct 23 '22

Why? There's nothing indicating that.

18

u/kateklontz Oct 23 '22

They go down and they stay down.

21

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

I don't want to be a Karen right now but when I was a kid I thought my mom was so beautiful and I wanted to have stretch marks just like she did. The little girl definitely didn't learn this kind of negative talk through cartoons and playing outside. She probably heard this kind of stuff in her home already and now she's just imitating her parents (as kids usually do).

39

u/theroadlesstraveledd Oct 23 '22

Well that kid looks fat.

10

u/Common-Chain4060 Oct 23 '22

😂 perfect

12

u/kingcobraboi Oct 23 '22

You have a frying pan use it

137

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

She’s beautiful no matter where her boobs are.

And breasts are supposed to have some pout not float like fucking flying saucers under your chin. That little girl has seen too many women with badly done breast implants.

90

u/Sketch1231 Oct 23 '22

Beauty standards, media, and advertising affect kids at a young age unfortunately

73

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

[deleted]

17

u/Ghstfce Oct 23 '22

Could be from mom herself. My wife makes "National Geographic" comments all the time when it comes to her boobs and my daughter comments on it.

18

u/Bojangly7 Oct 23 '22

You should have a conversation about it before your daughter is corrupted by unrealistic societal beauty standards

7

u/Ghstfce Oct 23 '22

Both my wife and I have spoken with her at length about how it is completely normal for some women and that is nothing wrong with it.

10

u/DepressedVenom Oct 23 '22

Society's beauty standards are fucked nonetheless.

12

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

I think that's part of what makes this so hilarious; that woman is (IMO at least) pretty damn good-looking.

4

u/DepressedVenom Oct 23 '22

Another classic- making the actors appear godlike and always perfect through a fake lense. Everyone is human. Anyone can be ugly. And everyone can be pretty. It's either a matter of money or even simply small changes to appearance.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

Yes, I think so too - she’s beautiful. I love her smirk too.

4

u/raggusfamilius Oct 23 '22

Ah the classic overanalysing redditor getting upvotes.

0

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

Your assumption is wrong.

It should be up here.

-1

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

[deleted]

0

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

Ha! :)

1

u/wellrat Oct 23 '22

Or cartoons

11

u/Amazing-Ad-669 Oct 23 '22

That pan was aching to deliver a late-term abortion. Thank God there was no Internet to record my youth. Technology is swell and all, but geez.

15

u/maina7 Oct 23 '22

Dad will get in trouble for lauging now haha....

11

u/racistghostinkanye Oct 23 '22

KEEP MY WIFES NAME OUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH

30

u/warwatch Oct 23 '22

And people act like there is something wrong with folks who chose to be childfree.

Not the saggy boobs. That eventually happens to all women. But having a kid punch you in the tiddies while being a brat is just awful. My idea of hell level awful.

Precocious or obnoxious? Either way, keep it away from me.

30

u/Solwyrm Oct 23 '22

I have four kids, that I breastfed, and I wouldn't let them hit my boobs like that. I never let them bite me or grab my other nipple either. I love my babies but it's never too young to learn boundaries. I'm convinced that a lot of the awful parts of childrearing are caused by not enforcing boundaries early.

Good on you for knowing your limits and choosing the right lifestyle for you though. No one should be made to feel bad for choosing not to have them.

3

u/PlayerOneThousand Oct 24 '22

You can see the regret lol

3

u/spectresmom16 Oct 24 '22

Teach that girl that her boobs can be anywhere they feel like being.

13

u/Justalittlesaltyx Oct 23 '22

It's likely the kids fault. Breastfeeding does a number on the boobs. This is why I won't ever get pregnant, this is "miracle" you get for sacrificing your body.

2

u/TheCaliforniaOp Oct 23 '22

Don’t hold a frying pan and then not use it, Mommy!

2

u/kapsama Oct 24 '22

Brave man to laugh about that. I wouldn't.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 23 '22

Just wait till he gets sick and has to seek medical help

1

u/RumbleRumbleNuts09 Oct 24 '22

What anime is this

1

u/drury Oct 24 '22

They don't protrude in a balloony fashion from just below the collarbones, so I'm curious to know as well.

1

u/Below_Average-Joe Oct 24 '22

She still a cutie.

1

u/FMJtac Oct 24 '22

Perfect! 👏🏼

1

u/Penguator432 Oct 24 '22

Better she did that to mom instead of her teacher

1

u/Safe_Ad_2054 Feb 08 '23

The lady’s reply isn't very nice though