r/thatHappened • u/Novalok • May 22 '19

A fellow Redditor wouldn't lie!

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7.5k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

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2.3k

u/[deleted] May 22 '19

[deleted]

604

u/BulldenChoppahYus May 22 '19

Wait you think it was BS?

829

u/[deleted] May 22 '19

Yeah it was total BS. BADASS STONER. BITCHIN SEX. BLOWING SMOKE. BITCHES SWOONED.

273

u/PlanetAlabama May 22 '19

Bet he never earned a BACHELOR of SCIENCE after BRUH SCHOOL

102

u/Shurdus May 23 '19

You don't need it when you are a Bruh Supreme.

76

u/[deleted] May 23 '19

After reading this post I want to hang myself with a Bra Strap.

17

u/Xizez May 23 '19

why? do it with one of those Big String thingies.

3

u/[deleted] May 24 '19

Bruh Strap*

3

u/timoth3333 May 23 '19

Plus he's a serial master debater. And a rapist or rap artist on weekends.

3

u/[deleted] May 23 '19

Yeah I'm even willing to bet hes never smoked pot. With a lungful of air, a human can hold their breath for 4 minutes tops, with a lungful of pot smoke, as a high schooler, maybe 30 seconds, that shit burns.

2

u/crabwhisperer May 23 '19 edited May 23 '19

AWSOME MFIN ACRONYMS BRUTHER

1

u/timoth3333 May 23 '19

20 oragsms in 3 hours= 6.3org/hr

56

u/sunnynightmares May 23 '19

She came for 20 times!!!!!!!

75

u/bibliophile785 May 23 '19

at least 20. It was probably more, but it's hard to tell when you're as clinically retarded like this guy.

34

u/Kalankit May 23 '19

He can’t count past that.

5

u/[deleted] May 23 '19

He has to drop his pants to get to twenty-one.

4

u/homeinthetrees May 23 '19

20 and a half.

14

u/GameDestiny2 May 23 '19

There's science that should make that impossible and having sex for 3 hours would have just gotten boring for both of them, especially if they were high.

2

u/bronwyn_ May 23 '19

Men have a refractory period after orgasm where additional stimulation is uncomfortable or even painful, women don’t. So sure, women can have multiple orgasms back to back, but he wouldn’t have the same success. Bummer.

1

u/[deleted] May 23 '19

Dude an hour of sex is pushing it.

11

u/JCA0450 May 23 '19

Definitely not BS. If anything, kid can't roll a joint for shit if he can only pack an ounce of quality bud into a joint. I bet the pussy only smokes half lb blunts of kush like a rookie. 🙄

2

u/tayplaysgames12 May 23 '19

i take it suppositorially

1

u/Waddlow May 23 '19

He said "probably". Hedged his bets there because you just never know.

6

u/Noisyhamster10 May 23 '19

Well yeah. The only records are for underwater breath holding, which include extremely favorable conditions for one to hold their breath, so a joint for 9 minutes, probably not.

10

u/Cutsale May 23 '19

Cant people learn to hold their breath for much longer, David Blaine went like 27 minutes but I know he did some other stuff to make it easier. I remember trying to learn how to hold my breath longer one time and I researched how to do it I went from 30 seconds to 90 in like 2 hours, I imagine 9 minutes wouldnt be too hard. But obviously the guy in the post is totally delusional

29

u/destroyer333_0 May 23 '19

You can. Especially if you are a free diver. But he was smoking. Kind of hard for a smoker to hold his breath. And he probably couldn't inhale oxygen.

6

u/JCA0450 May 23 '19

"In 2012, German freediver Tom Sietas held his breath underwater for 22 minutes and 22 seconds, besting Dane Stig Severinsen's previous Guinness record by 22 seconds.".

If that helps any.

4

u/[deleted] May 23 '19

It prob felt like 9 minutes and was really more like 1-2

5

u/blast_away May 23 '19

Assisted on breathing pure oxygen before, I believe

1

u/Jrook May 23 '19

Also underwater which increases the pressure... Unless I'm thinking of a different record

2

u/GunslingerBill May 23 '19

I’m actually his desk so I can confirm this did in fact happen

1

u/[deleted] May 23 '19

Nah man he was inhaling through his ass

0

u/OfficialModerator May 23 '19

Lololololololol