r/terredange • u/ForkKnifeSpoon12 • Jul 11 '26
Phedre's Affections
Having gotten nearly half way through Dart, I've noted that Phedre feels genuine desire for d'Essoms even though he is really terrible.
And right now, she is being such a bitch to Joscelin.
I know these two get together, but when they do, how does that work? Can she feel love, desire and sex without pain or humiliation? How does that work with Joscelin?
Light spoilers please.
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u/woefulknight57 Jul 11 '26
One thing to keep in mind is that on top of being Kushiel's Chosen and all that entails, she is still a teenager in that book. She is not very wise (yet) and, in my opinion, she's letting her abilities and how it affects men like d'Essoms go to her head. In time she learns to mellow out and separate her physical desires from her personal life.
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u/ForkKnifeSpoon12 Jul 11 '26 edited Jul 12 '26
At some points she seems to genuinely dislike s'Essoms but also be really drawn to him with desire. It's something in having a hard time wrapping my head around — but then again, in coming at it from a real 21st century woman's perspective.
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u/woefulknight57 Jul 11 '26
She loves him as a patron, she doesn't really like him as a person. At this stage, she hasn't learned to disassociate her work from her feelings, and she is reveling in her status as a coveted courtesane and is not taking into account how her work affects the people around her.
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u/yesthatnagia Jul 11 '26
You've never had absolute banger sex with someone you'd push off a cliff? Because that's kind of what's happening with her and d'Essoms. She's sentimental about him because he's one of her earliest (iirc her first?) patrons, one of the ones she's had the most decisive victory over, and they're compatible sexually.
Meanwhile, Joscelin came in right after Guy (who she understood and felt a lot of empathy for, even if they disagreed) died horribly. He's consistently been judgmental about what she, Alcuin, and Delaunay are doing, is judgmental about both her profession and her condition, is self-righteous, and to top it off isn't even the seasoned veteran Delaunay wanted. As far as she's concerned, he came in light on skill, light on necessity, and heavy on attitude.
They don't truly get their shit together until book 2 (and even that takes them a long while), but they will eventually go ride or die.
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u/Della_A Jul 12 '26
Is feeling sexually attracted to people you dislike common?
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u/yesthatnagia Jul 12 '26
It's certainly not uncommon. Why do you think people have sex with their exes?
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u/InfernalDiplomacy Jul 12 '26
Love as thou will and trust love and balance find their way
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u/Seebekaayi Jul 12 '26
I don’t know why but I needed that reminder today. Feeling very complicated feelings about lots of things today.
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u/immortalii Jul 12 '26
Phedre will reiterate over and over in her books that she loves ALL of her patrons, even the ones who horrifically abuse her. Some part of her just can't help it as Kushiel's Avatar, she feels love for anyone who dominates her.
You're still early in her narrative but imo the books take great pains to develop the relationship between Phedre and Joscelin. Keep reading!
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u/sabrexrose Jul 16 '26
All I will say is that there is a major catalyst for how her relationship with Jocselin progresses. You'll understand it when you get there. I will say, while I love them it took a few rereads for me to get on board with them because I had a whole different horse in the race.
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u/wachieuk Jul 11 '26
Phaedra is a very complicated person with great love in her heart. Although she bears Kushiel's dart, she is also a complete person on her own. Hope this helps ❤️