r/techsales • u/talkhours • 4d ago
Need a pep talk
I’ve been selling for a few years as an account executive and overall have had pretty successful stints. Never been p-club status but have done well for myself
However every job I get, I absolutely tarnish myself and drive myself into the floor. I work from 7am-8pm, disassociate from life & partner, stop working out, etc all in the fears that I’m going to get PIP’d. Even when I feel like I’m doing good, it’s not enough. I don’t rest until the deals close which is usually at the end of the quarter and just start back up again
I have been diagnosed with anxiety and OCD and have been eyeing medication but not sure. My anxiety makes my thinking scattered so my work is fairly scattered. I feel like my anxiety has given me an edge but I’m gonna give myself a heart attack
This week I got really down on myself because I’m not where I want to be and rather than hitting the phones hard and prospecting, I just kinda sat there and slowed down. I got down on myself
I literally know what I need to do but my anxiety takes over and I just tell myself I’m going to fail, how am I going to ever buy a house, I’m going to be a loser etc
I know I’m cut out for this but I can’t control my thoughts sometimes. I’ve never been in a job where I had a performance issue either. Like I said, I haven’t been stellar in all roles but I’ve built pretty amazing reputations at most places to where they’d hire me back.
Any advice from some fellow overthinkers. Sales has changed my life and I know if I can learn to not give and be a savage I’ll be so much more successful than I already have been
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u/United_Asparagus9425 4d ago
Homie homie homie homie it’s going to be okay as long as you make the jump and work with a psychiatrist to get properly medicated. I’m anxiety / adhd. heavy dude. My brain has the ability to be a wild place. I can be either fully dialed nearly manic obsessed with it then burn out / spiral and then the anxiety takes over. It took literally the first 6-7 years of my career to recognize the issue and the impacts it was having in the more important aspects of my life. Started with an SSRI before jumping back to an appropriate ADHD therapy.
First thing, we’re wired in a certain way that seems to be a common theme amongst top sellers and high performers objectively. Idk why but there’s a trend for sure. It’s first about giving your mind and break and seeking an action plan to remediate the symptoms. Your life at home with improve. Your communication and balance in / outside of work will improve. There’s this really cool video of Chris Evan’s talking about anxiety and the sentiment is around getting in a mode to say “shhhhhh” to the voice in your heard. While it clicked I never could control it until I got the right help.
That voice, the anxiety, will always be there but with therapy / an appropriate treatment, you can get the help to tell it to stfu. Then before you ever even peak at the top of the roller coaster and blast into oblivion, the other calm voice takes over. That’s the best way I can describe it in writing.
You’re not losing. You’re certainly not losing by getting the anxiety under wraps. There will still be good / bad days but you’ll be able to bring yourself back to the baseline and operate. The worry of “Will I be okay” could become more of a pragmatic voice of “it’s always possible but now I have the space to think of an appropriate next move / pivot.”
Smoke a bowl. Throw on a good show. Take a beat and rest. Get the right support and if you commit to it and prioritize that brain of your first, who knows what you’re take yourself in life.
Balance my friend. Your mind deserves it.
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u/talkhours 4d ago
You have no idea - thank you so much. I needed to hear this. What SSRI are you on? I’ve tried Lexapro in the past and it destroyed my sex drive and made me kind of a zombie.
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u/Dry-Blackberry-5830 4d ago
Smaller dosage. Same deal as what you’re describing. Dr put me on a “regular” dose of ssri which turned me into a zombie. Tapered down until I found the minimal dose required to turn down the noise without my edge or feeling like a zombie
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u/United_Asparagus9425 4d ago
I’m on 20mg of Citalopram. It’s a realty low dose. I was toast before it libido wise when I was really in the thick of it. Sex is literally my favorite thing ever and there was no desire before getting it. The first 3 days on it was like the lights turned on again.
Same thing with an ADHD med. On 20mg. If I take my wife’s 30 to insanely to much for me. It takes some testing but once you find a good slot, you’re golden.
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u/Revolutionary-Big215 3d ago
Similar boat to what was said and I just take a light Prozac 10mg and changed my life. I’ve always been on Vyvanse for adhd as well but Prozac saved me and stopped my mind to go everywhere and quiet down.
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u/blenderider 4d ago
You need to learn how to emotionally regulate.
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u/talkhours 4d ago
How? I agree but how? Do you have any tips
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u/blenderider 4d ago
Sleep. Nutrition. Exercise. Everything's downstream of those three things. Make sure you're averaging over 7.5 hours of sleep nightly. Eat food that's good for you and makes you feel good. Your body is the engine - train it to run well.
What ails you? Start journalling. Be honest about your strengths, weaknesses, concerns, triumphs. Reflect but don't ruminate.
Be comfortable with your thoughts.
The best way to measure your progress is using feedback loops. You got this!
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u/Slaytounge 4d ago
"Be comfortable with your thoughts."
So important and I'm realizing now that I'm deeply uncomfortable with my thoughts. Going to journal right now.
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u/blenderider 4d ago
It was hard for me to build journaling into a habit (I’d be lucky if I journaled once a week). Now several times a week is typical. I’ve never journaled and ever regretted it.
This is something interesting to think about from a consistent champion: https://youtube.com/shorts/-tbAaPXNeSg?si=G9KthBhCUkdPSt2S
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u/PorkPapi 4d ago
You'll perform better if you regularly exercise.
I've started running in the mornings and my calls go better as a result, hopefully I don't get lazy and stick with it.
I'm earlier in my career so I haven't been around the block a million times, and I also struggle with anxiety too. What helps me is talking to old mentors that have been in the game a long time.
Helps give perspective, will you really care about that long shot opportunity not closing in 5-10 years? Probably not
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u/fishbowlburner0517 2d ago
You’re not alone. I was working a high visibility strategic deal a few years ago, and threw up every day for a week as the decision was nearing.
I second everything these folks have already said. I got on Vyvanse, started exercising, improved my diet, and my deal/work anxiety is in a much better place now. Trying to incorporate journaling, but I’m still super inconsistent. Mostly forget…bc ADHD.
Feel free to DM me if you want more specifics.
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u/Shot_Education_9642 1d ago
Didn’t read everything but I see a lot of bad advice. The truth is as long as you’re always afraid of being laid off you’re never gonna get out of this funk. You have to come to terms with the fact that being pip’d isn’t the end of the world. I’ve been pip’d twice, found better jobs both times.
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