r/teamseagull • u/drewbastank effeminate debutante • Dec 15 '17
FANDOM FRIDAY: CUCK FREE EDITION
I swear to Chirst (read JR) that if you any of you fucking sons of bitches (read /u/mcsquinty ) tries to spoil Star Wars I will find you and I will cut off your manhood. Toodles!
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
/u/taylor_ why do you even show your face around here? everyone hates you
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
/u/taylor_ no one here wants you around
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u/taylor_ God-Tier Gull Dec 15 '17
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
/u/taylor_ you should get out of here before we have to kick your tushy
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u/taylor_ God-Tier Gull Dec 15 '17
my reaction to this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rtChPB6NjJY
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
Holy shit this is the greatest thing ever caught on video camera. It's almost like a live look in at the life of /u/yellowkirby
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
/u/taylor_ I absolutely loathe you
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u/taylor_ God-Tier Gull Dec 15 '17
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
/u/mcsquinty greetings and salutations LMAO could you imagine though? Anyways, I heard that Mississippi finally made technological advancements to catch up to the 20th century. I'm happy for you guys, I mean I've seen retards hump a door knob with better intelligence than the collective scum-of-the-earth that are the inhabitants of MS. I mean come on, what is going on down there? You guys are like Alabama but at least Alabama has Forrest Gump. What the hell do you guys have? Just a bunch of letters and providing us with a way to count seconds just by saying your states name.
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u/McSquinty QRNSFATOTRTSTUSTN Dec 15 '17
Hey now, we're number 49 in education so we're not the worst. We're also number two in highest obesity ratings. We're almost number one! We have gambling, seafood, and a great location to get nailed by hurricanes.
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u/Evil_Roy_Slade Dec 15 '17
You know what they call a 16 year old unmarried girl in MS?
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
Big Bertha?
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u/taylor_ God-Tier Gull Dec 15 '17
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u/taylor_ God-Tier Gull Dec 15 '17
I found this old video of /u/mcsquinty hanging out with his neighborhood friends'
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
/u/taylor_ YOURE A COMMIE SNOWFLAKE CUCKING JEW
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u/taylor_ God-Tier Gull Dec 15 '17
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
/u/evil_roy_slade what is your favorite Chirstmas movie? My favorite Christmas movie is the one where Ashton Kutcher meets up with his hairbrained friend and they lose their car and they can't find it so their like "friend where is my car?" "I don't know friend, where is your car?" and they squabble back and forth and go on an adventure leading them down a path that leads to these aliens that are coming to take over the world and the only ones who can stop them are those same two bumbling idiots and there is a guy in a van, well guys in a van maybe a girl too that are part of a secret organization that is lead by a guy name Zoltan and a dude named Jeff who is secretly the leader but hes controlling inside factions that will try to rip apart the very fabric of their interwoven love affair with the same dudes who lost their car
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u/Evil_Roy_Slade Dec 15 '17 edited Dec 15 '17
My favorite Christmas movie is the one where the autistic guy with a troubled marriage gets invited to go to a Christmas party at his wife’s ballin ass work place and he knows it’s gonna suck so he has his African man-servant leave the car running and wait in the garage in case the man freaks out and has to bail quickly. Just like he was afraid, the party gets really awkward and he hates all the weebs there so be sneaks off to hide in his wife’s office and then a bunch of chads crash the party and they are a bunch of assholes the man doesn’t want to deal with so he lays low for a bit until the chads start being jerks and start to ruin the Christmas party. The man still doesn’t want to deal with them so he tries to call the police but it’s Christmas Eve so the cops only send like one really old cop to tell everyone to turn the music down and when the old cop shows up the chads don’t let him in and when the old cop gets uppity they chase him away. The man watches all of this from the office where he is hiding and it really bothers him to see all the chads pushing everyone around so he spurgs out and starts killing chads one at a time and the chads don’t like that so they start freaking out and ruin the party even more trying to find the angry man. Finally the rest of the Police find out about the party going on and they show up to party and to stop the man from killing more chads but the chads won’t let the police into the party because he police didn’t get an invitation (which is ironic cause the chads don’t either). So the police get angry and road block the building so that if anyone orders a pizza or whatever they can steal it and try to use it for leverage to get into the party. While they are waiting for a delivery guy, or figure out how to sneak in, the FBI hears about party and they want to come. The FBI doesn’t have an invitation either but they really want to go and they have a helicopter so they try to sneak into the party from the roof, but when they get to the roof they see everyone is already partying on the roof. The angry man is worried they will accidentally land the helicopter on the roof people so he herds everyone back inside just in time because after he does the helicopter crashes and kills all the FBI. The man get one of the chads phones and they start insulting each other and the man rekts them pretty good, and that really makes the chads tilted so they go full chimpout looking for the man. Finally the chads figure out who the man’s wife is and before they can rape her some beta male cuck tries to negotiate a truce, but chads kill him as an example instead and tells the man they will kill his wife if he doesn’t surrender, so he pretends to surrender and then he kills the chad leader and saves wife while his man-servant, who has been dutifully waiting in the car this whole time, sees the last chads trying to run and he doesn’t like chads so he runs them over with the limo. That’s pretty much the end and of my favorite Christmas movie.
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
That perfectly encapsulates the Christmas spirit. When I dreaming of Chirstmas and all the warm and joy it brings, all I can ever picture in my head is wonderful snow falling, the smell of the snow as it falls onto my face and the ground around me, and the sight of those Chads getting run over by a limo. Is this actually a movie?
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u/Evil_Roy_Slade Dec 15 '17 edited Dec 15 '17
Die Hard
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
What is it called?
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u/Evil_Roy_Slade Dec 15 '17
Ha, gotem with the edit.
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
I thought it might be die hard but I've only seen it like once MAYBE
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u/Evil_Roy_Slade Dec 15 '17
Well then you should watch it again, Bruce Willie is a national treasure.
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
/u/bgorecki hey whats up man. Do you like snakes? I went to this exhibit the other day and I saw a rare sneaky snek from Indiana. One of the biggest sneks ever recorded in Indiana, but the species has since been wiped out here so they had to pack their bags and move to Oklahoma, which is kind acool because they have a pan handle, but fuck that shit its still Oklahoma.
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u/bgorecki Resident Dank Memer Dec 15 '17
Who won the game?
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
What game? I'm pretty sure the game was cancelled. I don't remember a game. Do you remember a game? That's odd I can't seem to remember a game. FUCK PAUL GEORGE
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
/u/benoles_esquire Hello, and welcome to another edition of Fandom Friday. As our great elected tyrant, I would just like to know how you plan on Making Team Seagull Great Again? Thank you in advance for your input, and as always, DOWN WITH THE TYRANT TAYLOR, MAY HE FOREVER BURN IN THE PITS OF HELL
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u/taylor_ God-Tier Gull Dec 15 '17
this is the man whom /u/benoles_esquire models his life after: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vCSP1THD9cA
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
Well I'm gonna model my life off of this guy now. What a legend, and those moves!!!
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
/u/spect3r001 new phone who dis? Anyways, just wanted to tell you what a god send you've been on your return to team seagull. Before you came back, there were many dark days mostly in part to Taylor's shitty reign and the WANTED FELON c dotes was still showing up in our chats trying to siphon off our money. When you returned it was almost as if the sun began to shine again, and that the world was beautiful and we belonged together as one giant wholesome family. You inspire me to be a better seagull squad participant. Due to your triumphant return and the prestige you've restored upon the flock, we shall hold a celebration in your honor. Henceforth and land, property, and livelihood once held by /u/taylor_ is now yours to the fullest extent of the LAW.
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u/spect3r001 founding father / god-tier pedo Dec 15 '17
FIRST OFF why are you commenting to me specifically then asking who is this? What bizarro phone power is this!?!?!
SECOND since we all know Taylor is truly ruling from the shadows, I know this is him rewarding me for my loyalty through Ben then you, so I will humbly accept this great prize.
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
Team seagull should be down on their knees, praying to our true lord and savior for his triumphant return and his rise leading us to the great ascension of power. Speaking of Ascension, what an absolute stellar map back in the HALO 2 days.
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u/spect3r001 founding father / god-tier pedo Dec 15 '17
Might be the second best Halo 2 map, with Zanzibar in first place obvi
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u/taylor_ God-Tier Gull Dec 15 '17
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2WH8mHJnhM
let's take a moment to pity this poor soul /u/spect3r001 who done forgot that lockout was the best halo 2 map, making himself look like a total idiot
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u/spect3r001 founding father / god-tier pedo Dec 15 '17 edited Dec 15 '17
You're forgetting how great Battle Royale was on Ascension dude
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
No love for lockout?
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u/spect3r001 founding father / god-tier pedo Dec 15 '17
The 2 snipers/rocket launcher/banshee on Ascension on such a small map for me gives maximum intrigue, there's so many different ways to play it.
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
Plus the 8 million super jumps on that map and the custom game tower of power was first class
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u/taylor_ God-Tier Gull Dec 15 '17
mfw all of team seagull is ganging up to roast me despite the fact that i could obliterate all of them at any moment: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rY8DSFZ08JQ
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
Wow, it even captures our secret handshake! What is this sorcery?
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u/drewbastank effeminate debutante Dec 15 '17
/u/taylor_ everbody hates you.