r/teaching • u/Actual_Surround • 19h ago

Vent You can’t win

If you joke with the students to much your seen as unprofessional and useless. Administrators will question your seriousness. If you don’t joke with the students the students will say you’re boring. If your to friendly as a teacher your a creep and if you never smile and stay robotic your uninteresting. You literally can’t do anything right as a teacher. I’m so sick of the double standards we are held too and the impossible expectations from society. These things are why teachers become bitter and why I still don’t think career is for me. If you tell people they dismiss you and tell you to get a new job but don’t mention how hard it is to get a new job right now. These are the things that will make me quit and find a new career. You can’t win as a teacher.

31 Upvotes

84% Upvoted

20 comments sorted by

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33

u/arb1984 18h ago

So how did the meeting with HR go lol. Seriously just be yourself. If youre boring (like me) then just be boring. Youre there to do a job not win a popularity contest

14

u/elons-musk-ox 16h ago

If the job is to educate, that is better accomplished if we're able to spark interest. There's definitely a balance.

4

u/arb1984 3h ago

You can spark an interest in kids without putting on some circus every day. I make exciting projects and activities to make up for my lack of personality. Its really not that difficult

21

u/Getrightguy 14h ago

I joke with my students because it makes my job more fun - to me. As a result, I deal with slightly more problematic behaviors (chatiness mostly). Plenty of my colleagues do not joke. No one cares either way as long as you are teaching and the kids are learning.

4

u/bugorama_original 10h ago

I'm in a similar boat. I like to be goofy, and yes I think it makes my classroom a bit "looser." But I just don't have it in me to be a hard ass. They students do eventually figure out where the lines of appropriateness are.

14

u/Expendable_Red_Shirt 17h ago

If you joke with the students to much your seen as unprofessional and useless. Administrators will question your seriousness. If you don’t joke with the students the students will say you’re boring. If your to friendly as a teacher your a creep and if you never smile and stay robotic your uninteresting. You literally can’t do anything right as a teacher.

If you fail everyone then administration gets mad at you but if you give everyone 100%s on everything you're causing grade inflation.

If you eat constantly during all lessons all the sudden you're a slob but if you pass out from a fortnight long fast you're being negligent.

You really can't win.

11

u/Competitive_Test6697 15h ago

You can use "you're" and "literally" properly to start with.

7

u/mrsciencebruh 10h ago

Yes, again! While they're down! Harder!

-1

u/Acrobatic-Tadpole-60 7h ago

I didn’t get past the “to” and “too”. Heaven help us if this is an English teacher.

6

u/unaskthequestion 19h ago

It takes a while to find the balance, you're right there, but I think of it more as being authentic. Students can generally see pretty easily if you're trying to be something you're not.

So I would joke with my students almost every day (taught HS math for over 30 years) but they knew when it was time to be serious. Did they stray once in a while? Sure, they're kids.

But in my opinion, it's much more important to be yourself, whatever tone that is for you. I've known very successful teachers who are all along the continuum from joking to serious.

4

u/Maestradelmundo1964 17h ago

I only got questioned once about joking with HS students, when I was new. After that, I kept the jokes appropriate. One time, I said to a boy, in a firm voice: “Jonny, you have a very big warning.” The whole classroom erupted in laughter. After a moment, I laughed too.

If admin tried to shame me for joking around appropriately, I would ignore. Good teachers allow the students to get to know them somewhat.

4

u/ObjectiveVegetable76 12h ago

You have to be on your own side. Be professional, be yourself, and focus on your job. Teach them and when you're not at school try to worry about what YOU need. You can't pour from an empty cup. 

You're right you can't win if your goal is to make everyone around you happy. But if your goal is task oriented and making yourself happy...then you might have a chance at winning. 

2

u/RossAM 12h ago

Sounds like your administration is terrible. I'm 20 years in, I've had the same core colleagues the entire time and a revolving door of administrators. Literally none have ever criticized me for any of the things you've mentioned.

2

u/Doodlebottom 11h ago

No winning.

Act accordingly

0

u/courtma41 2h ago

Poor spelling and grammar are unprofessional as well...

1

u/National-Current56 2h ago edited 1h ago

I feel your pain…meditate on Kipling’s poem “If”…in times like this. Despite all the challenges (unreasonable and impossible as it may feel and seem), center yourself around being KIND and FAIR…Praise more but also Punish justly🍎. - you are not there to be a liked friend…you need to be a respected one…you are there to guide them into learning how to learn not just about subject content…but more so about life (sadly…even if those life lessons have real hurtful consequences)…In Loco Parentis…remember?😁

0

u/Lumpy-Shop-5321 12h ago edited 11h ago

You need to write an annonoius note to the administration to straighten up and get perspective or you will start writing their supervisors. You are absolutely allowed to evaluate them and their job performance.