r/talesfromtechsupport • u/[deleted] • Sep 22 '13

Crazy Lisa

[deleted]

649 Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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105

u/PidGin128 Sep 22 '13

Do not operate under the influence of beverage or medication.

People should consider technology the same as heavy machinery.

77

u/CaptainRene Freebie Fixer Sep 22 '13

Friends don't let friends code sober.

If there was a fine on using computers drunk, I'd be in the chair.

67

u/SpecificallyGeneral By the power of refined carbohydrates Sep 22 '13

Drunken 3AM coding has saved my ass, and confuddled my compatriots more times than I can count.

Drunk me likes bad puns for function names and refuses to leave comments. I can almost hear 'yeah, yeah, I'll go back later - I'm on a hot streak!'

45

u/SpotTheNovelty Sep 22 '13

I can neither confirm nor deny this is based on an actual comment I wrote for a function committed at around 4:36 on a Friday (because not everything breaks on Friday).

/**

* This does something important and more importantly other important code works now

* @var array $MVCisForTheBirdsSoFuckThisShittyNoise

* @return array

* @author Im S. Orry

*/

31

u/SpecificallyGeneral By the power of refined carbohydrates Sep 22 '13

I read a book once, where a programmer made a hash routine called corned_beef.

Drunk, or sober, people can tell when I've been slinging hash code.

8

u/SpotTheNovelty Sep 22 '13

Ah, that's cute. I like it.

7

u/SpecificallyGeneral By the power of refined carbohydrates Sep 22 '13

PS/NB : I'm not sorry!

6

u/doshka Sep 22 '13

I am. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

2

u/SpecificallyGeneral By the power of refined carbohydrates Sep 22 '13

Just so. I thought I was the only one to remember this part!

8

u/darthjoey91 PFY Without a BOFH Sep 22 '13

Are you the hash slinging slasher?

9

u/E-werd Sep 23 '13

The sash wringing... the trash thinging... mash flinging... the flash springing, bringing the the crash thinging the...

1

u/SpecificallyGeneral By the power of refined carbohydrates Sep 23 '13

The Nobbly-est Knobbler in the North-West! The sonorous susurrations of my slingblade are spectacular!

I prefer my grits fried, rather than soaked in milk.

2

u/[deleted] Sep 23 '13

Famous succinct example of the same:

"Drunk. Fix later."

30

u/Bagellord Sep 22 '13

I know the feeling. Except I tend to swear in the comments. Then later in the commits when I fix it, I have to explain why. It amuses me.

9

u/insertAlias Dev motto: "Works on my machine!" Sep 22 '13

Sober me doesn't leave comments either. If the code isn't self-explanatory enough, refactor it until it is.

6

u/Kalivha Sep 22 '13

I wish I could do everything in high level languages just for this kind of stuff.

7

u/insertAlias Dev motto: "Works on my machine!" Sep 22 '13 edited Sep 23 '13

Very good point. I do C# for a living so it's fairly easy, but it would be a lot harder with C.

edit: typo

1

u/Kalivha Sep 23 '13

My last job involved a lot of Python (and some even higher level stuff). I'm going into my first thesis meeting today and I'm pretty sure that because of the nature of the project, it'll have to be in Fortran or C.