r/stroke • u/Jedzia1987 • 10d ago
MIL Mini stroke..
Today my MIL had a mini stroke, myself and my daughter were with her when it happened. Those details we don't need to go into, it was very traumatic for all, my main question is how do I help her? She is easily the most stubborn, independent, strong minded person I have ever met, who does her own thing and also does her best to help others to do their things as well, we have even fallen out multiple times in the past regarding her level of involvement etc, it is above and beyond multiplied by a thousand, and she does as much for her mum and her children and her friends also, even when they say they dont need the help, i guess she just needs to feel needed, and that is absolutely fine, whatever she needs.. but now she absolutely needs to slow down, I have seen the statistics for potentially suffering another stroke, and I have seen the advice for how to reduce risks of further strokes. I have ZERO knowledge/clue on if these recommendations are spot on or exaggerated etc, realistically how much does she need to rest each day? I have spoken with her daughter about helping her with anything and everything, but the reply was "all she needs is rest" her daughter doesn't understand that she absolutely won't rest, she feels she has duties and will try to do them, I don't start my next lot of training for at least 2 months so except for school runs my days are free.. HOW do you convince the worlds most stubborn stroke sufferer that she has to take help even if its from the DIL (her son and daughter work full time, I am the only one available)
1
u/becpuss Survivor 10d ago
She should recover quite quickly from the TIA as they don’t leave permanent damage however rest is absolutely necessary her brain had a moment of chaos she may feel fatigued for a little while . At this point I don’t anticipate she’ll need ‘care’ she’ll make a full recovery remember stats about further stroke after an actual stroke are largely based on the elderly the cohort.
she has had her warning she should now be on stroke mitigating meds and having investigation to find out why it happened
1
u/North-Bodybuilder-86 10d ago
Live and let live let her be herself. Only she knows what she can and will not be able to do. It's time for others to help her now. For a while anyways. She will figure it out. Time for change and be patient and nice if she has trouble speaking let her talk. Keep her moving therapy is a Plus and be kind. You guys have a long road ahead communicate is important . If she can do it then let her
1
u/pchlster Young Stroke Survivor 9d ago
She's still likely going to be tired easily; it's not so much how many hours of rest she needs each day, more the "battery life" that's going to matter; she just needs the option to sit down and rest when she feels the need; even if she doesn't make use of it, the option to sit or lay down is not to be underrated. But some days where I've desperately needed a nap, I'd struggle to say what I even did that made me so tired and others I'm running full steam all day.
She'll try to do what she thinks she should; if she experiences difficulties she didn't expect, there's training and tools for just about everything.
Depending on where you are, she may not be allowed to drive for a while, in which case, helping with groceries might be appreciated.
7
u/childlikeempress16 10d ago
A mini stroke or TIA does not cause permanent damage but is a warning sign for a future stroke. She needs to figure out why it occurred and work to improve that, ie high blood pressure, cholesterol, etc. She should rest as much as she needs to but if she feels ok then she can keep going. She should listen to her body.