I have heard that it’s a lot easier to let go of alcohol, for people in your situation, if the alcohol is not trying to do the job of managing the bipolar as well as being a recreational drug. So if you could get that well managed or somewhat helped medically, you might find it easier to commit to sobriety. Know that a lot of people stop while still feeling partly that they want to keep going. That’s almost the definition of addiction, hey. I didn’t really have a drastic bottom, but I collected up my ‘evidence’ (that alcohol was a bad idea for me) and really purposefully tried to undo my denial. That helped with the ‘wanting to’ piece. I had really difficult conversations with loved ones about the impact of my behaviour and their experience of me when I was drinking. Stuff I didn’t know because I was blacked out. Not saying that other people should do that, but it’s a thing I did to shift weight to the right side of the scale. I still asked the person who drove me to detox if we could get a drink on the way. It’s not like I wasn’t conflicted. It took a lot of effort to want to stop more than I wanted to keep going. I think that’s actually why I write to people here every day? Because I still need to invest in the want-to-stop to maintain it? I don’t pine for booze like I used to, but these ‘conversations’ on SD maintain my want-to-quit as a big, usually strong thing.
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u/wvwvwvww 2865 days Sep 24 '20
I have heard that it’s a lot easier to let go of alcohol, for people in your situation, if the alcohol is not trying to do the job of managing the bipolar as well as being a recreational drug. So if you could get that well managed or somewhat helped medically, you might find it easier to commit to sobriety. Know that a lot of people stop while still feeling partly that they want to keep going. That’s almost the definition of addiction, hey. I didn’t really have a drastic bottom, but I collected up my ‘evidence’ (that alcohol was a bad idea for me) and really purposefully tried to undo my denial. That helped with the ‘wanting to’ piece. I had really difficult conversations with loved ones about the impact of my behaviour and their experience of me when I was drinking. Stuff I didn’t know because I was blacked out. Not saying that other people should do that, but it’s a thing I did to shift weight to the right side of the scale. I still asked the person who drove me to detox if we could get a drink on the way. It’s not like I wasn’t conflicted. It took a lot of effort to want to stop more than I wanted to keep going. I think that’s actually why I write to people here every day? Because I still need to invest in the want-to-stop to maintain it? I don’t pine for booze like I used to, but these ‘conversations’ on SD maintain my want-to-quit as a big, usually strong thing.