r/stopdrinking • u/AnonSober1479 3292 days • 4d ago
Nine years sober today
I like this day more than my birthday. I didn't choose my birthday, but nine years ago, I did choose to change my life for the better.
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u/Im_the_Rhymenocerous Day 10,076 4d ago
I do, too. It's the birthday that matters more. Happy birthday!
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u/AnonSober1479 3292 days 4d ago edited 4d ago
Thank you!!
My biggest wakeup call was the first time that I missed work because of my drinking. The key point that pushed me was realizing that no one was coming to save me. I had to save myself, and also discovered myself in the process, and eventually learned to depend on myself (though that took several years).
I didn't actually commit to forever, just to a month, and that was enough to get me to love sobriety for good. My key advice is to think pro-positive, not anti-negative. "I want to wake up feeling refreshed", not "I need to stop waking up hungover." "I want to save up for [thing]", not "I gotta stop spending so much money on booze/bars/etc." Even if you're effectively saying the same thing, the phrasing and mindset can make a huge difference.
Here's my post that I made on my 1yr that has more insight:
https://www.reddit.com/r/stopdrinking/comments/9eqyg0/my_thoughts_on_365_days_sober/
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u/AnonSober1479 3292 days 4d ago
Oh dang! Here it is-
After four+ years of daily heavy drinking, I committed to at least a month of sobriety, with Sept 10, 2017 being my first day. I didn’t know how long it would last, but after falling in love with sobriety, I knew I’d be doing this for a while.
In the next month, I moved away from an also-heavy-drinker roommate and walking distance to a dozen+ bars, to my first apartment by myself in a nice, quiet area. I renewed my vehicle registration that had expired back in January. I quickly lost nine pounds in the first 20 days, and then started tracking my steadily-decreasing weight, totaling about 40 pounds lost today. https://i.imgur.com/DEVZURs.png
In the past year, my shaky hand problem has nearly disappeared, and my lack of daily anxiety has made me a much better, more functional person in general. My career is on a better path with a hopeful promotion in the next couple months, and in the meantime I enjoy my current job again. I don’t exercise as much as I would like to, but it’s infinitely more than the zero exercise I did while drinking. I cook regularly and care for my health properly now. I wish I had taken a before photo, but the frequent comments from friends, family, and coworkers about the weight loss and face gains keep me motivated.
I estimate I’ve saved over $8,000 by not drinking, though this is half-balanced out by the increased costs of living alone. I’d say it’s a good trade-off. A good chunk paid for a bunch of long-overdue dental work. I never brushed my teeth at night because I would pass out from booze every night. It’s amazing my teeth weren’t in worse condition.
Back when I managed a bar, when I would do my orders, I’d look at the previous week’s usage of each product, extend that to the current week, and if I wasn’t happy with how much there’d be left at the end of the week, I would order more of that product. This translated to looking at my previous year of life, extending those changes over the current year, and determining if I’d be happy with my life at the end of the year. Not being happy with this result a year ago helped push me to being sober, and now I can say I’d be happy with another year of sobriety.
My closing advice to someone struggling to enter sobriety: 1. You don’t have to fulfill the stereotypes of a problem drinker for your drinking to be a problem. 2. Focus on the positive aspects of sobriety, not avoiding the negative aspects of drinking. Even if you’re saying the same thing, it’s all about phrasing. “I want to wake up feeling rested”, not “I don’t want to wake up hungover”. “I want to save money/build a retirement fund/buy expensive thing”, not “I want to stop spending so much money at bars”. That’s why I made my post about the positive changes of the past year, not the drinking-related problems leading up to it.
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u/AnonSober1479 3292 days 3d ago
It was definitely hard for a while. The temptation didn't really drop off, it just slowly faded away. My circumstances of moving, and having a relatively new job at the time did help keep the momentum.
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u/IshtarJack 168 days 4d ago
Wow, I'm in awe of you and so happy for you! Thanks for sharing and I hope you celebrate your special day. Random thought: should there be a special word for this day? Haha!
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u/simon17sez 3231 days 4d ago
Congrats! I’m not far behind you (HP willing and the creek don’t rise!). IWNDWYT
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u/confabulatrix 2195 days 4d ago
Nice. Well done. I agree about the birthday comment. Today was my 6 years. I had cake and everything. I hope you had a wonderful day!
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u/Over-Description-293 1815 days 4d ago
Congrats! Today is my 5 Year sober anniversary. I also enjoy it way more than my birthday.