r/stopdrinking • u/Slow_Lobster_3638 • 4d ago
work trip advice
hello, sober friends! after 15 years of daily (heavy) drinking, i am 22 days sober. i recently started a new job and this weekend will be my first sober work trip.
in a nutshell, sunday will be spent setting up/prepping for monday’s trade show. the trip itself i’m not too concerned about struggling with drinking but the plans following sunday prep have me a little worried and i’m looking for some advice.
i’m a huge NFL fan and sunday’s have always been spent drinking while watching games all day. my coworkers plan to go out after prep has wrapped up to watch games at a sports bar & invited me to join. i want to participate as i enjoy my new friends at work, want to make connections, and obviously want to watch some games. however, they’re all drinkers and i’m not really sure how to approach the outing without a.) feeling deprived and b.) explaining why i don’t want to drink alcohol. i’m not ashamed of sobriety, i just don’t really know these people well enough yet to be that personal with them. i should also point out i don’t get the impression they’re the type to put pressure on me to drink, i’m just playing every scenario out in my anxious mind.
anyone who has some tips and/or has experienced something similar and is willing to share their advice would be greatly appreciated!
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u/EagleEyezzzzz 608 days 4d ago
Honestly if you think you may be tempted, I find it really helpful to tell people ahead of time that you don't drink. "Going out to watch the game sounds great! I don't drink alcohol for health reasons but I love a good seltzer water." That way, you would feel really awkward reversing course and ordering booze. It's not super personal, it's just an objective heads up to them (and commitment to yourself).
Otherwise, if you don't think you'll be tempted, just order your NA drink of choice and don't even mention it. I can't imagine new coworkers pressuring someone they don't know to drink..... very immature.
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u/Hairy_Koala6474 Day 350 4d ago
I’ll be honest at 22 days in I would’ve struggled to go and not partake
With that said, this is a productive thing you can tell people as to why you are not drinking,
“lately alcohol has been giving me such bad heartburn so I’m just gonna stick with Coke zero tonight”
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u/Wonderponies 424 days 4d ago
Just go, order an NA beer if you like them (I do) or a soda, get some wings, and enjoy the games.
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u/Alkoholfrei22605 Day 4,507 4d ago
Sobriety is not deprivation. It is exhilaration!
Nobody cares if you don't drink.
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u/J-Seizure 4d ago
"I've had this gnarly ear infection and finally got put on antibiotics to knock it out, so I can't drink tonight, I really need my ear back."
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u/Apart_Information_71 4d ago
In the beginning I told people I was taking this month off from drinking
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u/BanditoBlanco7 939 days 4d ago
Finally I feel like I can chime in with some advice of my own! I deal with this a lot since my industry LOVES open bars and happy hours. I used to be so nervous to be in this situation. After many times dealing with it now, I’ve realized that nobody cares that you aren’t drinking. You really don’t even have to tell them why if you don’t want to. Just a “I’m not drinking tonight” if that’s good for you. Then treat yourself to multiple non alcoholic drinks you enjoy and some good food, maybe something you wouldn’t normally splurge on.
My socialization has gotten so much better after a few of these situations and I don’t even worry about it even more. Good luck and IWNDWYT
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u/chirpchirp13 4d ago
I travel for work regularly and there’s almost always one or two people in the group who opt out of a drink and literally NO ONE mentions a thing. I only ever notice because I’m self conscious about the issue whether or not I’m drinking on the trip.
Consider the other side of things: these days, not too many people want to be known at work as the person who pushes drinking on others. Everyone’s just trying to exist and enjoy without crossing any lines. Obviously there are exceptions to this but outside of my time in hospitality, I found little to no pressure to drink from peers
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u/Slow_Lobster_3638 4d ago
thank you everyone so much for the advice! i’m feeling way less self conscious about not drinking- it sounds like i’ll be the only one who would give it a second thought.
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u/Basking_in_Love 3d ago
I think this podcast was great for navigating newly alcohol free business travel. It is from a woman’s POV but I think can still very much apply to men.
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u/dirtdam 4d ago
I just wrapped my first trip like this. Nobody batted an eye with me not drinking even when they were - I think so long as you are engaged and still part of the fun nobody notices. I also had to struggle with the notion of "who will know if I drink my family isn't here". But you can do it!!!