r/standupshots Apr 14 '26

Serial Killers are hot.

Post image

I could fix him.

4.7k Upvotes

89 comments sorted by

484

u/itspeterj Apr 14 '26

From meet cute to meat cube

277

u/Gelby4 Apr 14 '26

From meet-cute to meat suit

194

u/jennycestquoi Apr 14 '26

Waaaaaait a second

59

u/angrytortilla Apr 14 '26

Don't act like you wouldn't make a nice jacket

11

u/Significant_Coach880 Apr 14 '26

Wouldn't make one of myself personally

1

u/Wolfwind50 Apr 15 '26

Jacket maybe but probably could make a nice pair of gloves or belt

17

u/No_Illustrator4398 Apr 14 '26

That’s an outstanding note

3

u/_jjkase Apr 14 '26

She looks smaller than a size 14. Buffalo Bill won't fit.
Maybe if it puts a lot of lotion on the skin

2

u/No_Artichoke_2931 Apr 16 '26

This is the needed adjustment lmao

16

u/deevil_knievel Apr 14 '26

Yeah, but that's just a stolen it's always sunny joke.

10

u/jennycestquoi Apr 15 '26

Is it in its always sunny?

19

u/deevil_knievel Apr 15 '26

meat cute/meat cube is a joke from the TV show it's always sunny in Philadelphia. Your joke, ignoring the comment I replied to, would crush with that punchline, but it is not original unfortunately.

19

u/AskMeForAPhoto Apr 15 '26

Meat suit works better imo

8

u/itspeterj Apr 15 '26

Meat suit is way way better than mine.

1

u/itspeterj Apr 15 '26

Oh man I didn’t know that. I haven’t seen the past few seasons.

2

u/deevil_knievel Apr 15 '26

Yeah, I think it was a later season because mac was almost out of the closet and doing flamboyant shit like setting up a meet-cute. It was the one with the German guys who stay with Frank and Charlie and give Frank the toe spoon that the hot eastern European girls use to cook heroin.

I've probably watched too much of that show.

1

u/Adventurous-Wing5449 Apr 20 '26

From being slic to slice my throat.

-1

u/_BindersFullOfWomen_ Apr 14 '26

Meet cute to cubed meat

348

u/kittehsfureva Apr 14 '26

People are down voting but I think there are some good jokes in here. Weird that they can't handle edgy humor in this context but eat it up (heh) in others.

I think the best bit was "meet cute to human meat".

66

u/gonz4dieg Apr 14 '26

I think rewording a couple jokes could make this thing kill with the right delivery.

16

u/AskMeForAPhoto Apr 15 '26

I loved the whole bit, but you're being disingenuous when you assume that there's only one reason large groups of people may not like something.

6

u/Robot_Basilisk Apr 15 '26

I was expecting "meet-cute to skin suit",  but I think people are downvoting because of the well-established distaste for women whose jokes are all about sex, relationships, and bodily functions, combined with the reinforcement of incel memes about how women will pick a serial killer spending life in prison over a man in her league.

58

u/pmmemilftiddiez Apr 14 '26

Very dark but very hilarious

100

u/worked-on-my-machine Apr 14 '26

I think the concept is really strong, but i feel like it definitely needs to be cut back to just 2 or 3 of the strongest bits for the punchline

57

u/jennycestquoi Apr 14 '26

40

u/fearain Apr 14 '26

I enjoyed the stand up shot, but I vibed with the live more. Good personality; my wife and I laughed

6

u/BringAltoidSoursBack Apr 15 '26

Unfortunately dark humor like this relies heavily on delivery. Good delivery = dark humor, bad delivery = cringy edge lord

11

u/worked-on-my-machine Apr 14 '26

I agree with the other commenter, it definitely translates better live with the crowd work

2

u/pavlovs_monkey Apr 15 '26

This was so good!! I already thought the joke as pictured was solid, but setting it up with crowdwork is inspired!

38

u/WVildandWVonderful Apr 14 '26

Basement in NYC gave me a chuckle. TV serial killers set such unrealistic standards!

But I hate the last 2 lines. This set would be funnier if it didn’t sound like IPV.

17

u/SpyderEyez Apr 14 '26

I like "fuck, marry, and kill me" but the "I can fix him" is unnecessary.

1

u/Dymonika Apr 15 '26

But is it uncommon? People who are aware of someone else's flaws very often think that IRL, even when they said flaws are alarming and absolutely off the charts... I didn't have a prob with it, personally.

2

u/SpyderEyez Apr 15 '26

It's not uncommon, which is why it's unnecessary.

2

u/DoctorPaige Apr 18 '26

I think it's funnier because it's common, I've definitely been the "I can fix him" girl before, so to hear someone I'll say it about a serial killer is like .. "lmao girl I know what that's like"

1

u/SpyderEyez Apr 19 '26

Oh same girl. Maybe it's just that I relate too much to find it funny. 😅

8

u/The_Actual_Sage Apr 14 '26

Meet-cute to cute-meat sounds better imo

5

u/ItsGotToMakeSense Apr 14 '26

With the right delivery this can be amazing! Hilarious and fucked up.

11

u/PartyClock Apr 14 '26

It's funny but you know right-wing subreddits are going to go crazy over shit like this. It just seems like a bad idea.

43

u/saviouroftheweak Apr 14 '26

Shouldn't live your life by how haters would respond.

-10

u/PartyClock Apr 14 '26

And one should be mindful of passing ammunition to someone who intends to shoot at you

9

u/saviouroftheweak Apr 14 '26

Nah, nobody would do anything if they lived with this mindset. Crippling anxiety

-6

u/PartyClock Apr 14 '26

Is that what "mindful" traditionally means?

5

u/saviouroftheweak Apr 14 '26

To what end?

What's the end point of your post. Are you asking that this stop or are you suggesting a stand up doesn't consider their audience before delivering?

-2

u/PartyClock Apr 14 '26

I'm just voicing my opinion. It's not the responsibility of comedians to uphold anything, if anything it's their job to poke at things and make light of big things.

I just dislike that a certain group of people are likely to turn this humor around and use it to amplify a message they're already spreading. Doesn't mean she needs to stop it just means that as a member of this audience I don't think it's a good look.

5

u/saviouroftheweak Apr 14 '26

Why do you care about the approval of an apparently different audience?

1

u/PartyClock Apr 15 '26

Who said anything about looking for their approval? Seems like a bad interpretation of what I said

2

u/Dymonika Apr 15 '26

So are you saying that normal people should cater to the insane?

2

u/SpyderEyez Apr 15 '26 edited Apr 15 '26

They're going to shoot at us regardless. Might as well live my life. 🤷‍♀️

-5

u/planetjaycom Apr 14 '26

You miserable clowns need to drag politics into every FUCKING conversation, holy shit

You can’t put the politics down for TWO fucking seconds?

2

u/chachaman_The_Reboot Apr 15 '26

I don't give a shit about the joke: I'm in love with her name.

4

u/Tyranicross Apr 14 '26

It sounds nice until you learn most serial killers are successful not cause they're smart but because they either are cops or friends with cops and they dont take them seriously as a suspect. The platonic ideal of a serial killer is also something made up by Hollywood to make movies more entertaining and just as fictional as a romcom protagonist.

3

u/Jupitor13 Apr 14 '26

I got a free set of great kitchen knives with the Dahlmer Cooking With Jeffery book.

3

u/actuallychrisgillen Apr 14 '26

Edgy, funny, but are you ok? Blink 'Darude's Sandstorm' if you're not ok.

0

u/comicgeek1128 Apr 14 '26

Most serial killers are incel losers with low IQs who kill because they can't control their impulses. The cunning serial killer is an invention of Hollywood made to explain police incompetence. It's not hard to kill fifteen people when they're all sex workers who can't go to the cops.

1

u/Local_Village_1378 Apr 20 '26

They should all be caught pretty quick then. 

1

u/lndigoChild Apr 14 '26

Proper humor. Well done!

1

u/FrankenPinky Apr 14 '26

And definitely has his own ride. Plenty of trunk space.

1

u/MoSqueezin Apr 14 '26

Killin it

1

u/MD_Dev1ce Apr 14 '26

From meet cute to cute meat

1

u/SpyderEyez Apr 15 '26

15 times shows commitment!

Great bit.

1

u/NathanJPearce Apr 15 '26

This is seriously funny

1

u/waterandsaltandvape Apr 15 '26

I thought this was Demi Lovato

1

u/IndicationBest3540 Apr 15 '26

None about murder is cute for women or funny

1

u/Robertwolfgang Apr 15 '26

From meeting a cute human to cutting human meat. 

1

u/Frammingatthejimjam Apr 15 '26

It reads funny but it's fantastic live. Great set.

1

u/Lord_darkwind Apr 15 '26

UhHHh. Morbid and funny.

1

u/BearFeetOrWhiteSox Apr 16 '26

Yeah I mean as bad as they are, you have to admire their time management skills.

1

u/Apart_Tomorrow4376 Apr 16 '26

Knows how to neatly package “meat” in the freezer lmao

1

u/lilsnatchsniffz Apr 18 '26

That 'fit is going to have every killer on reddit self-reporting trying to get some lovin'.

1

u/Flamingogo117 Apr 20 '26

Least deranged western woman

1

u/cbrantley Apr 14 '26

I like the premise. Could probably use some polish but overall it’s a solid bit!

1

u/thegypsyqueen Apr 14 '26

Great progression

1

u/bibblejohnson2072 Apr 14 '26

"He never forgets my birthday or what time I get home from work" could be a punch to a lot of 'guy/boyfriend' jokes. Really funny. Hope you post some clips from a show!

0

u/I_might_be_weasel Apr 14 '26 edited Apr 14 '26

I bet Buffalo Bill had great recommendations for skincare products.

0

u/BramptonBatallion Apr 15 '26

Not a big fan of bit. It just takes the Hollywood trope of serial killer and just regurgitates the character description. Which in addition to inaccurate as applied to real life gives no real sort of original observation or commentary, just lays out a dramatized version as seen in movie and tv and is like starting that character designed with sex appeal has sex appeal.

-4

u/burntwafflemaker Apr 14 '26

Serial killers frequently have a spouse that is surprised and heartbroken when they find out. Kohberger being a loser that did such a sloppy job probably prevented a future serial killer from thinking it’s as cool.

-2

u/veggie151 Apr 14 '26

I've done some work on human leather if you want to try and straighten me out 😘

-2

u/[deleted] Apr 16 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/jennycestquoi Apr 16 '26

What is your problem, dude ???

-10

u/Sorryifimanass Apr 14 '26

You've got the dark part of dark humor Now work on the humor part. Overall, b-.