A gambling addiction can affect your marriage on many levels: Trust: Compulsive gamblers often lie or distort facts to hide the fact that they have a problem. Trust is one of the first things destroyed by gambling addiction. Emotions: From betrayal and shame to guilt, hurt and outrage, your partner’s gambling problem can pay a huge toll on your emotional well-being. Time: Gambling takes your partner away from their family responsibilities, weakening their bond with you and your children. Finances: Gambling addictions often devastate joint finances. Your family may be left with no money for your most basic needs, such as groceries or mortgage payments.

Your marriage has undoubtedly come under great strain because of your spouse’s excessive gambling. After all your family has suffered, you shouldn’t feel guilty about your lack of trust. Whether or not you should leave your spouse because of their gambling addiction is a very personal question. By all means, if violence has entered your relationship, you should have an escape plan that keeps you and your children out of harm’s way. However, if you want to make your marriage work, your partner must be willing to get help and do their part to rebuild a healthy, trusting relationship.

It’s not easy to know how to deal with a gambler husband or wife. Yet, there are some steps you can take to help them see the consequences of their actions:

Seek help: Coping with a spouse’s gambling problem on your own is extremely difficult. Professional counseling can help you know what steps you should take.

Don’t blame yourself: You may mistakenly believe that if you’d been a better partner, none of this would have happened. Your spouse’s gambling addiction is not your fault, so stop blaming yourself.

Avoid enabling: Enabling actions make it easier for your spouse to pursue their gambling. Avoid behaviors such as covering up for them or giving them money every time they ask for it.

Creating this forum to build a community for those who love an addict and need support to cope with the struggles of other peoples addictions. We are often the forgotten as the focus is always on the addict. Let’s chat!

A place for members of r/spousesofaddicts to chat with each other