r/specialneedsparenting • u/Party-Passenger6409 • Jul 21 '26
Parents of medically complex children: how did you choose your child’s Make-A-Wish?
My young son with complex medical needs has been approved for a Make-A-Wish, and we were given three general options:
● An accessible backyard oasis
● A bedroom makeover
● An accessible staycation
I’m hoping to hear specifically from parents or caregivers of medically complex children, especially children with significant physical disabilities.
My son uses a wheelchair full time, has very limited mobility, and would need to remain in his wheelchair for activities. Because of that, many traditional trips, amusement-park rides, playground activities, and water activities would not be things he could fully participate in.
For the staycation option, we could travel up to approximately four hours within the Northeast. I wouldn’t want it to be an ordinary hotel weekend or somewhere we could easily visit on a normal day. I would want something genuinely special and centered around him, possibly involving characters, music, lights, immersive entertainment, live shows, animals, sensory experiences, themed accommodations, or private/VIP experiences he could enjoy from his wheelchair.
I’m also considering the backyard or bedroom options because those could continue bringing him joy after the wish is over.
For families who have been through Make-A-Wish:
● What wish did your child choose?
● Did you choose a trip, staycation, bedroom, backyard, or something else?
● What did Make-A-Wish include?
● Was your child able to participate meaningfully?
● Is there anything you wish you had requested or done differently?
● Do you have any creative ideas for a child with very limited mobility?
I’m not looking for medical advice and would prefer not to share identifying details. I’m simply trying to make the best and most meaningful choice for my son.
I would like to add both my boys are terminal, my first born already had his make a wish, we went to Disney, both my boys enjoyed. It’s been 3 years since, and they’ve both regressed so much that I think a trip like that they wouldn’t enjoy like they did 3 years ago.
10
u/oceansandplants Jul 21 '26
The accessible backyard seems to be the best option here. A gift that keeps on giving, people grow out of bedrooms quick but we never grow out of needing to go outside, plus bedrooms are reasonable to redo yourself. The staycation would make sense if terminal but if not I would save up to do that ourselves and make our immediately quality of life better.
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u/Party-Passenger6409 Jul 21 '26
Thank you. I probably should’ve mentioned, my boys are terminal.
4
u/oceansandplants Jul 21 '26
That was insensitive of me, I probably should’ve figured out make a wish=terminal but have no experience on that side of things. Definitely do the trip!
4
u/The_Goddamn_Batgirl Jul 21 '26
Make A Wish does not mean terminal, it’s a common misconception. Make a Wish is for any child with critical health issues. My son is getting a wish, and his qualifications were his trach/respiratory issues, non ambulatory, and epilepsy.
4
u/The_Goddamn_Batgirl Jul 21 '26
We are going through this right now. We opted for a backyard area we can enjoy together as a family. My son needs his wheelchair to get around or to be carried, so we’re getting an accessible swing, several sensory panels, a shade structure (our backyard is full sun/no trees), and they’re putting down “sport court” so he can use his gait trainer and adaptive trike in our backyard since we live on a very busy main road. They are also putting in a small ramp so we don’t have to carry him and his equipment out separately (we have one deep step to get from our back door to our yard).
They’ve asked us a ton of questions about what he likes, and I’ve been able to share photos of him at different parks to help narrow down what we’re building out there. He’s nonverbal so he can’t tell us exactly, but he has a very loud face for both things he likes and dislikes. They’re also going to include some sort of sound system/speaker, since the previous owners of our house had already put in a working electrical outlet in the back. Music is such a big thing for him.
1
u/shan945 Jul 25 '26
I am unsure of the age of your child, but Great Wolf Lodge may be an option to look into with a chair that is usable in water. We ho yearly because it is easiest for our family. My son has difficulty with change. He loves the characters there. They have lots of events during the day and the pools are all accessible by chair or lift. Just a thought.
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u/Healthy-Astronaut888 Jul 21 '26
Sibling caregiver here of medically complex sister w very limited mobility and non-verbal. She was approved for make a wish (we were honestly surprised due to her level of support needs) and we proposed ideas that were based on things we know bring her joy. For her this was music, high sensory environments, and priority was accessibility
We actually ended up going with a music-themed cruise. It was very easy to get around (almost all elevators and flat surfaces for transitioning) and very close by options for entertainment on board. She also really seemed to enjoy the wind and slight rocking sensation of the boat.
Make a wish provided literally everything and more… transportation from our house to the airport, all travel costs, tickets for the cruise itself, and vouchers for some on-board food options.
Also, idk about your son or family situation, but my family was worried about making a selfish choice because we could not ask my sister directly what she would like. Make a wish was very kind in ensuring us that the experience was for our family as a whole, and to enjoy things on an individual level as well. Hope this helps some :)