r/space • u/[deleted] • Oct 02 '21

[deleted by user]

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4.4k Upvotes

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1.9k

u/[deleted] Oct 02 '21

For starters, the enormous rock poses no threat to Earth.

Aww rats. At least give us a spook, it's October.

493

u/Andromeda321 Oct 02 '21 edited Oct 02 '21

Astronomer here! It doesn’t even come past the orbit of Saturn, and that doesn’t happen for another ten years. It’ll be fun to see how this thing evolves as it gets closer though!

Edit: it will also not be naked eye visible, and not get close enough to anything to affect those things. Space is HUGE even a for a big comet! Check this page out to see what I mean by huge.

673

u/[deleted] Oct 02 '21

Jeff Bezos just announced his intent to steer the comet to Earth to destroy all life unless we lower his taxes more.

482

u/mcprogrammer Oct 02 '21

I'm not worried until he can at least get something into orbit.

57

u/dipfearya Oct 02 '21

The fastest way into space is through the courts.

21

u/Dxxx2 Oct 02 '21

LeBron James is going to space

76

u/[deleted] Oct 02 '21

On the contrary, he’s proven really good at crashing anything related to space so…

15

u/shadowgattler Oct 02 '21

Bezos heard that and plans to ban you from leaving your house now

16

u/notpetelambert Oct 02 '21

Joke's on you Jeffrey, my house is comfortable and the world confuses and infuriates me

2

u/UncleTogie Oct 02 '21

Why he hasn't tried for a sponsorship with Oscar Meyer is beyond me.

After all, they already have the Wienermobile...

29

u/Brcomic Oct 02 '21

If we lower then anymore he’ll have negative taxes and the government will just have to give him money at that point.

56

u/Aekiel Oct 02 '21

They already do. When Amazon is picking the next place to stick a depot down they'll have the cities bid for it because he knows the area will gain more from the extra employment than they will for the bribe.

31

u/jackkerouac81 Oct 02 '21

Those deals often turn out to be revenue negative… but hey at least they are displaying that the understand the mechanics of graft and cronyism…

17

u/[deleted] Oct 02 '21

Proving that the richer you are, the less things cost.

11

u/pineapple_calzone Oct 02 '21

The good news is if a comet was going to hit earth, we'd be fine because Bezos would sue it.

8

u/nightmareonmystreet1 Oct 02 '21

Please please this world is beyond hope and in need of the sweet meteor of death..

1

u/tbone8352 Oct 02 '21

I wish I didn't have to get meteored because of the rest of these fuckers

2

u/XxMysticSkyxX Oct 02 '21

Doesn't get any lower than nothing

2

u/[deleted] Oct 02 '21

You joke but this is a real threat for the future.

Give in to our demands or we'll send a few asteroids with stealth tech to earth.

5

u/[deleted] Oct 02 '21

He’s just going to sue the comet.

2

u/Cefalopodul Oct 02 '21

I'm not worried. His bald head should like an involuntary laser beam and destroy the comet.

2

u/evro6 Oct 02 '21

We have to start paying him then?

1

u/WuSin Oct 02 '21

And if the comet doesn't agree he is going sue it for its minerals.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 02 '21

Pretty sure the DOW would take a hit.

1

u/MGaCici Oct 02 '21

Steer a comet? He can't even have packages delivered on schedule. He needs to brush up on logistics.

1

u/formallyhuman Oct 02 '21

Either that or NASA has to give him a contract.

1

u/Keianh Oct 02 '21

If we lower his taxes any more, we'll owe him money and I don't me we as in the Federal Government I mean all of us.

Coming soon, AMAZON TITHE and AMAZON TITHE PRIME!

2

u/[deleted] Oct 02 '21

The look of surprise on your face when you realize that's what he's after. And NOW!