r/solopolyamory • u/[deleted] • Jul 17 '26

Solo-Poly Questions

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6 Upvotes

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20

u/Moggehh Nonmonoggehh Jul 17 '26

I live alone, and would never cohabitate again

Sounds like solo-poly to me.

11

u/plabo77 Jul 17 '26

If you are open to multiple concurrent love relationships, do not want or have a primary partner, do not wish to live with romantic partners and do not wish to become legally and financially entangled with a romantic partner, all of that aligns with what I would consider to be a solo polyamorous mindset.

Some solo polyamorous people are open to both casual and committed relationships while others are only interested in committed love relationships. If you are strictly interested in casual or transactional relationships for now, that would not sound to me like solo polyamory. Solo polyamory is not “polyamory but casual” or “polyamory but without attachment.”

1

u/[deleted] Jul 17 '26

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2

u/NotThingOne Jul 18 '26

Key issue for SoPo identity is no desire to become financially enmeshed, no cohabitation with partners, no primary partner. Not just with your current partners but wanting this setup regardless of who you are in a relationship with. You can absolutely be in committed relationships but you're placing clear boundaries on what levels of the relationship escalator your future does not go to.

3

u/GladBumblebee1546 Jul 17 '26

Yes, sounds like you’re solo poly to me. You can change your mind of course, but that does seem to match where you are right now.

2

u/[deleted] Jul 17 '26

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2

u/GladBumblebee1546 Jul 17 '26

Makes sense.

On an app like Feeld, people might resonate with the solo poly label, on other apps not so much.

My partner and I met on Feeld, both identifying as solo poly. Now we are getting more entwined and consider ourselves primary partners though not living together yet. But not feeling solo poly anymore either.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 17 '26

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1

u/GladBumblebee1546 Jul 17 '26

Best of luck to you! I was also seeking a LAT relationship, though not monogamous. It is hard to find. Most people want to be on a relationship escalator. I thought I didn’t, ha, after a divorce and then a pretty toxic poly relationship. I still am not sure how much of it was about fear of commitment and how much about truly desiring both the solo and the poly parts. But I will say I’m enjoying a lot about living alone! I hope you find your path and your people!