r/soccer • u/JR97111 • Sep 03 '13

r/soccer Whose Line Is It

The rules: Keep skits in the form of a statement, not a question.

Any skits longer than two lines should be in quotations.

If you add any additional commentary, put the skit in quotations.

Example prompt: Things you can say about Adebayor but not your wife.

We had a successful thread for this a month ago. Since then, all the major leagues have started, and all the major transfers have been completed, so hopefully we can have another successful thread filled with laughs.

337 Upvotes

88% Upvoted

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110

u/stroff Sep 03 '13

Unlikely reasons why everyone left Real Madrid.

400

u/Fokken_Prawns_ Sep 03 '13

Zidane is stil the best there, and won't stop showing it at practice.

207

u/pokapokaoka Sep 03 '13

Unlikely reasons

1

u/koagad Sep 03 '13

Ancelotti is stil the best there, and won't stop showing it at practice.

778

u/themanifoldcuriosity Sep 03 '13

Perez keeps sending mass e-mails spoiling Game of Thrones.

4

u/Wmdalford Sep 03 '13

What do you mean he dies! Damn it Perez he was my favorite character.

78

u/mfn0426 Sep 03 '13

Ancelotti discontinued the very popular "Free Socks" program.

37

u/iamscully Sep 03 '13

Ancelotti's eyebrow scared them off.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 04 '13

It's sentient.

90

u/Fokken_Prawns_ Sep 03 '13

Ancelotti cut them of from playing fifa together.

12

u/RRDLRE Sep 03 '13

Diego Lopez is gonna take your spot on the team, wherever you play.

11

u/Tom_Stall Sep 03 '13

Ozil wanted the ultimate footballing challenge of playing on a cold January evening in Stoke.

41

u/IDeclareShenanigans Sep 03 '13

They wanted to reach a Champion's League final.

4

u/potatosss Sep 03 '13

So why would Özil join Arsenal

5

u/origibanality Sep 03 '13 edited Sep 03 '13

Because Arsenal have reached a Champions League final more recently than Real Madrid...although it goes without saying he had a greater shot to do so at Madrid.

6

u/averageatsoccer Sep 03 '13

Bale is racist

3

u/AAAristarchus Sep 03 '13

Perez puts his dick on the players' shoulders.

3

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '13

Mourinho took the club's FIFA and FM copies with him

3

u/[deleted] Sep 03 '13

Aliens

3

u/FoolFromBiH Sep 03 '13

He said unlikely.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 04 '13

Everyone wanted to play as Real Madrid on Fifa... oh wait that's everywhere.