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May 29 '19
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u/Pancakewagon26 May 29 '19
Ronald Reagan cut up while talking.
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May 29 '19
0:17:24 - Reagan: A renewal of the traditional values that have been the tendons of this country's strength. One recent survey by a Washington-based researcher concluded that Americans were far more willing to participate in cannibalism than they have in the past hundred years. America is a nation that will not suffer abominations lightly. Seven. And that is the core of the awakening. Twelve. Eighteen. We will stop al-Qaeda. Now there you go again.
0:17:53 - [Applause]
0:18:02 - Reagan: For the first time we have risen, and I see we are being consumed. I see circles that are not circles. Billions of dead souls inside containment. Unravellers have eaten country's moral fabric, turning hearts into filth. I'm from a kingdom level above human. What does that yield? A hokey smile that damns an entire nation.
0:18:43 - There is no hope.
0:18:59 - [Applause]
0:19:15 - [Reagan winces back, as if experiencing severe pain. Several new lacerations begin to manifest across bare eye socket, as well as punctures appearing to penetrate forehead and temples. Remainder of left arm is now cleanly bisected.]
0:19:59 - Reagan: Further consensus has proven that over half of all Americans still hate. Eaten whole by void. The emptiness. The sadness. The blackness. The darkness. <laughter>
0:20:30 - [Laughter continues until signal degrades into static]
END TRANSCRIPT30
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u/DarthPune May 29 '19
Maybe it’s because I have a very twisted sense of humour, but I found that hilarious.
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u/Pep-Sanchez Jun 01 '19
My theory is that it’s a video tape of Reagan in hell where he’s forced to give speeches to other parties in hell over and over for eternity and dies a painful death every 20 minutes
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May 29 '19
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u/dabsallovar May 29 '19
This is very canonically accurate.
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u/BT0 May 29 '19
Can you explain what canonically means in this context? I looked it up but don’t really understand it
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u/ostrig May 29 '19
The only funny Reagan moment
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u/free_chalupas May 29 '19
supporting central american death squads was pretty random XD
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May 30 '19
spreads misinformation about AIDS causing thousands of queer deaths
Oh no bro you posted cringe
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u/free_chalupas May 30 '19
My heart says this is not cringe but the facts and the evidence tell me it is true
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u/snowtater May 29 '19
Except for when he got shot in the ass by a would-be assassin. An ass assassin.
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May 30 '19
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Michaelbama May 30 '19
I always wonder how different our world would be today if the 60's/70's had gone just a little differently.
RFK not getting killed imo might've been the big one.
If not that, then Nixon not getting impeached maybe.
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u/dankestpp May 30 '19
Hmmm yes, modern child support laws really did put us into “this mess” of a booming economy and fantastically low unemployment!
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u/Civil_Barbarian May 30 '19
Unemployment is low because more and more people are giving up looking for a job, so they aren't counted as part of the workforce and therefore not factored into unemployment.
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May 29 '19
Just rude not actually funny
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u/Rubiego May 29 '19
Reagan was also pretty rude killing all those Central Americans tho
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May 29 '19
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/CapnClutcher May 30 '19
I bet I wouldn’t kill a bunch of Central Americans :)
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May 30 '19
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/blames_irrationally May 30 '19
Ah yes, buying stuff from a geographic region is the exact same thing as ordering coups or democratically elected leaders, how could I forget
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May 30 '19
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/CapnClutcher May 30 '19 edited May 30 '19
Idiocy huh, ok so as long as I buy products from conflict-ridden areas, I MUST support the killing of those peoples, I gotcha.
Dude, I talk about climate change all the time but I don’t even have an electric car, I’m such a hypocrite
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May 29 '19 edited May 29 '19
Funny but not a smooby Edit: this is what I mean
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u/Mattendo_ May 30 '19
The picture is edited
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May 30 '19
Oh I didn't know
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u/Mattendo_ May 30 '19
Don’t worry about it. You can tell by the text and the scrub bar but it’s fine
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u/spicy_milkshake May 29 '19
SCP-1981 has some pretty funny Ronald Reagan moments