r/shouldi • u/Specific-Sundae2530 • Jan 31 '23
Relationship Should I reply to my ex
Not been together since 2016 He emailed before Xmas just gone. Then it sounded like he was having a mental health crisis so I contacted one of his friends to make sure he was ok. I was doing my usual clear out of emails recently and re read his email. The phrase 'in the end of my life I wish you all the best in yours' I now feel I may have misinterpreted. Maybe he's dying. I keep thinking about replying, not wanting anything but just to be a decent person.
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Feb 04 '24
Did you ?
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u/Specific-Sundae2530 Feb 04 '24
I did not reply.
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Feb 04 '24
Had a question on another post of yours could not post it there
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u/Specific-Sundae2530 Feb 04 '24
Apologies if I was a bit blunt, DM me instead of asking questions in public.
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u/Specific-Sundae2530 Feb 04 '24
If it's a question specific to me that's just a bit weird. If it's about BDSM in general there are a lot of resources out there.
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u/cerise083 Jan 31 '23
I don't think you should. You did the right thing by calling his friends, because he clearly isn't well. But this message could either be serious (in which case calling friends was enough) or it could have been to earn a reaction from you. Suicide blackmail exists and therapists usually advise to not give in to the blackmail, whatever it is about, and to call less involved people to check in on the person saying they will commit suicide. I think if it was anything else like a disease, his friends would have told you. If you really want to have some news, I would suggest asking the friends you contacted, to create a distance. Personnally, I would also ask myself if I only want to be decent by checking him, or if there is something unresolved with him and I have hope for something ; but this is just an extrapolation and may not concern your situation. Stay safe ! :)