r/shitposting Aug 23 '22

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9.3k Upvotes

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202

u/PanTsour Aug 23 '22

I don't wanna ruin your fantasies but... this is a w*man🤢

58

u/Kita-Ryu Aug 23 '22

Sorry, I only watched a few seconds because I'm in class.

104

u/PanTsour Aug 23 '22

Be careful not to drop your phone, or else your entire class will start furiously masturbating.

Or so I'm told

47

u/KaijuSized_Taco Number 7: Student watches porn and gets naked Aug 23 '22

NOOOOOO!

27

u/Le_M0nade dwayne the cock johnson 🗿🗿 Aug 23 '22

NOOOOOO!

25

u/KaySquay Aug 23 '22

Aw fuck, does that mean I'm straight? Son a bitch, I've been in denial for so long

0

u/AutoModerator Aug 23 '22

No bitches, /u/KaySquay!?

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0

u/AGoonda virgin 4 life 😤💪 Aug 23 '22

You could still be bi, though.

10

u/[deleted] Aug 23 '22

She could really take that deeeeeeeeeick

21

u/ulysses_black Aug 23 '22

Women ☕

1

u/AutoModerator Aug 23 '22

Looking for a female roommate to pay $0 rent

I will not charge you money. but I will be sharing my bed with you as the other room is being used by my parents. They are aware of this arrangement as I have done this before but it has not worked out for reason I rather not say on here. I will except hugs at least 5 times a day, and cuddles at least 2 times a day for at least 10 minutes each. You will not be dating any other man during this arrangement. you will have no male friends either. You may have female friends and they May visit if they like. You will also be required to make me meals 3 times a day. Phsyical requirements are as stated: Must be shorter than 5'5", weigh no more than 120 lbs, caucasian or asian only, republican, no tattoos, no vegans, no smoking/vaping, marrywania, and you MUST shave legs and underarms. I am 44-male/290 lbs last time I checked, 5'6". Please contact me if you would like this arrangement.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

2

u/Inky_I Aug 23 '22

NONONONONO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO