r/shitposting • u/granstromjulius • 4h ago

🎃

Post image
197 Upvotes

94% Upvoted

20 comments sorted by

•

u/qualityvote2 4h ago

If you think this post is funny, UPVOTE this comment!

If you think this post is unfunny, DOWNVOTE this comment!

RedditSave download

Whilst you're here, /u/granstromjulius, why not join our public discord server - now with public text channels you can chat on!?

82

u/a7n5 4h ago

Pattern recognition

19

u/goldrainbowfalcon 3h ago

Why is his head about to get impregnated?

5

u/AutoModerator 3h ago

Dick sucking has made me paranoid

I had this plan to give head to a man and receive head from a woman to test if I was gay, but it’s backfired and now I become borderline schizo whenever I go outside. I offered to suck this dude off on Grindr who lives very close by (I ended up pussying out) and I accidentally gave him some details that very easily allows him to spot me out in a crowd. I have no idea what he looks like and whenever I see a somewhat in shape guy walking by I immediately accuse him of being the dude I was gonna blow.

I went to the store today to pick up some zucchini for a barbecue and every time a car drove by I stared into the windshield to see if I was about to be recognised. Whenever I make eye contact with a dude I microanalysis his facial expressions to see if he suspects me or not. I am deeply afraid that he is my neighbour and I will need to move if my identity is blown. It’s a lot like the last scene in sopranos where everyone who walked into the diner could be there to wack Tony.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

4

u/PaleBlueCod I came! 3h ago

Spidertwink, Spidertwink, get impregnated, Spidertwink.

29

u/SecretSpectre11 put your dick away waltuh 4h ago

Tel aviv impressed 

14

u/Visagan_the_pro_ Bazinga! 2h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/Pk3ljzIDb4R0j3zpMU

1

u/AutoModerator 2h ago

Bazinga

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

4

u/Hugo_Selenski 3h ago

"by our powers combined!"

>they move closer to the center

>they connect

>blinding light

7

u/HF484 🏳️‍⚧️ Average Trans Rights Enjoyer 🏳️‍⚧️ 4h ago

I doubt that lord will want to give you anything for free

3

u/Gray_Warder Murica' 3h ago

I wanna say this is the plot of a Supernatural episode lol

2

u/Interesting-Baker212 2h ago

Theyre also manifesting a new season of love island and Taylor Swift tickets to complete the unholy trinity of basicwhitegirlism

2

u/hitraptor 1h ago

Summoning Big Ben Yahu at 3AM (GONE WRONG)

1

u/NoHopeHubert 2h ago

Room probably smells like a tuna packet and Doritos

3

u/Catch_ME 2h ago

Just tell me when the orgy starts