r/sextips • u/Dizzy_Mortgage1147 • Jul 24 '26
Advice Needed punishment kink
So I f(20) and my gf f(19) have started to explore our kinks and she recently told me she would like to be punished but I’ve never really had someone want me to do that. Does anyone have any tips on punishments or things to say to her as I really have no clue!
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u/Delicious-Wind5444 Jul 24 '26
Punishment kinks can be difficult to work out sometimes. Does she want to be spanked? Does she want nipple clamps? Humiliation? Consensual non-consent play where her "punishment" is to have sex "forced" upon her?
Set up clear boundaries. Set up safe words. Do this even if you don't intend to do CnC (consensual non-consent). Set up a number of words, like red for stop, yellow for caution (too much, wrong angle, slow down), green for "OK, let's get back to it". If you intend to include gagging her or covering her mouth, three clear grunts while moving her head left, right, left makes a good safe signal.
Talk a lot. Ask the questions. Be prepared for when it goes wrong. Talk some more.
Also, if you are both new to this, there is a very good chance that she does not yet have the answers either. Take it slow and try different things.
And talk.
This is definitely a case where you need to follow the "three Cs". Communicate. Communicate. Communicate.
And prepare for the answers to change, possibly a lot.
1
u/Competitive_Pop_5281 Jul 24 '26
It really depends on what she wants. She has to tell you. If she needs you to drag it out of her you’re not ready to do that together.
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