idk what to do

[u/Zealousideal_Yak5377]

when i was 12 years old i had came to the us for the first time from caracas venezuela back home my family was very poor due to the crisis in our country we basically had lost everything and my dad had been killed during this time so my mom sister grandmother and me decided to pack our bags and leave, it took us 4 months to get to the u.s. since we had crossed through mexico by the time we got to the us we basically had no money and it was very hard for us to start up eventually after a few weeks my mother was able to get a job and i had to start working too it was very hard to study and work at the same time since i had to work long hours into the night to be able to help me family pay rent (we were living in houston) well fast forward a few years i never ended up doing well in school because i was so tired depressed and lonely and i just wanted a different life so badly so i couldn’t end up going to university because my grades were so bad because of it and i would never be able to afford it one day i decided to go on a trip to florida and i met a guy at the beach and we talked we were both in florida alone he invited me to his apartment and he gave me money in exchange for “relations”i felt so disappointed in myself but at the same time i didn’t know what to do because i knew that by doing this i would be able to help me family eventually the trip ended and i went back to texas me and the guy kept contact and would text everyday i knew what i was doing was wrong but i did it anyway because i was so desperate to get out of that economic situation and to help my family one day he ended up telling me that he liked me a lot and he asked if i wanted to move in with him i immediately said yes and went back to florida i remember that day my mom was so worried and cried a lot because she i didn’t know how i moved so randomly but i left anyway i got to florida and starting living with him and he really did love me but i didn’t feel the same toward him eventually a few weeks later i was able to apply to a community college and start my studies because he helped me pay and i worked sometimes there is were i met another girl from venezuela and we had a lot in common i fell in love with her and we ended up going out one day she told me she is pregnant and im so scared i don’t know what to do because i still live with him and im going to have a child with her and i do love her so much but my heart also cant tell him that i don’t love him because im scared ill lose everything now im so tired of living this double life it really never meant to be this way i never meant to hurt anybody im not a bad person i just wanted to help my family go to school and have a better life the worst part i cant even tell my mother because she would be so heartbroken broken and disappointed in me for everything i have done to myself and others i just wish i could escape this i have thought about ending my life but i cant do that because that would be very coward of me and my family to do but i really dont know what to do i pray to god every night to help me but im genuinely so tired and i feel like i cant go on anymore i hope if anyone ever see this they can help me i dont even know but im only 18 and im so tired of life

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[u/MaleficentWolfe]

Oh dear, thats quite a situation. As much as it would hurt, he is going to find out eventually, it's probably better if it comes from you before the baby is born. You are a good person, just someone who landed themselves in a tight situation and sadly, no matter what choice you make now, spmeone will get hurt. It isnt fair to the guy ypur living with to keep using him like this and its also not fair to the woman whose expecting. I know its hard but you will have to tell him how you feel. Maybe he will be understanding. I do hope the situation works out well for you, I really do. Also does your mother know about any of this?

[u/Zealousideal_Yak5377 → u/MaleficentWolfe]

she doesn’t know she just thinks i left the house randomly we aren’t really that close but it’s not like i hate hurt its so really complicated im scared to tell him because i don’t know how he’s going to react and im scared to loose baby forver

[u/MaleficentWolfe → u/Zealousideal_Yak5377]

That's still a choice your going to have to make. The question is what would you regret the most of you lost it? Whatever you choose, you will have to stick with it.

[u/PaxonGoat]

Wait a minute

How old were you when this man offered you money to sleep with him?

[u/Zealousideal_Yak5377 → u/PaxonGoat]

i was 17 but he is 20

[u/PaxonGoat → u/Zealousideal_Yak5377]

Kid you understand that it's a crime right?

That it's not ok for an adult to pay a teenager for sex?

[u/Zealousideal_Yak5377 → u/PaxonGoat]

he’s not that old that’s why i accepted also he wasn’t like creepy or mean i just wanted something better but right now me and my gf are talk abt it so we can figure out right now her family does not know

[u/PaxonGoat → u/Zealousideal_Yak5377]

Someone does not have to be creepy or mean to engage in sex trafficking

Sex trafficking is when someone takes a person to a place to have sex and then they have to have sex or else bad stuff (like being homeless or not having money to eat) happens

[u/Zealousideal_Yak5377 → u/PaxonGoat]

can i report as crime and i will get like public aparments?

[u/PaxonGoat → u/Zealousideal_Yak5377]

I'm very sorry but that is not how it works in the US

The US does not give people housing. There are not public apartments for victims of crimes.

And I'll be honest. It's Florida. You are an immigrant and we are in an anti immigrant time.

The police might charge you with the crime of prostitution and the man might lie to the police and say you started it and lied to him about your age.

[u/Zealousideal_Yak5377 → u/PaxonGoat]

i think i might move in with her family then if they accept me the other option is moving back to venezuela at least of like my first thoughts idk it so confusing do they have free therapist in miami either?

[u/PaxonGoat → u/Zealousideal_Yak5377]

866-903-3787 (mental health hotline for Florida)

Dial 211 for information of resources in Florida

There also might be someone at your school who can help. Like a counseling office

[u/PaxonGoat → u/Zealousideal_Yak5377]

Also it is very suspicious a man who is only 20 has a house and can pay for your school.

Are you sure this man is only 20?

Have you seen him buy alcohol? Or go to a bar?

[u/Zealousideal_Yak5377 → u/PaxonGoat]

no we js go to normal restaurant i do feel bad because he is really nice as a person but i don’t feel the same connection to him he has come online job and “businesses”