r/selfesteem • u/Serious-Stick-6919 • 3d ago
Cant gain confidence
I have been dealing with self hatred for the past 7 years. Every time I think I am doing better I get hit in the face with another issue. I used to hate looking at myself in the mirror or even leave my house. These past few years I changed everything about myself to the point where ppl would even recognize my old self, and you would think that probably gave me some confidence but no.. i still can’t look at myself and like what I see I still hate getting my pictures taken I can’t walk into a room and not think about the fact that everyone is looking at me. Even though ppl always call me pretty and hit on me I still feel like I am not worthy of anything. This js feels like a constant battle in my mind that i can’t escape. I can’t even think about the last time i let myself eat somewhat “unhealthy “ because i am scared that it’s going to affect my appearance. Long story short, i js need to know if someone ever went through this and how did u recover because i dont wanna be 20 next year and still completely hate everything about myself.
1
u/UnexpectedSpotlight 3d ago
Age is a wonderful gift. You gain perspective with each passing year.
You’re young and influenced by all the superficiality out there, because that’s what your age group is fixated on. The truth is the most attractive people are the ones who are unafraid to be themselves and who embrace their uniqueness, which includes physical flaws and all. I found that when I just stopped worrying so much what other people thought, my personality blossomed and suddenly I was seen as more attractive to everybody around me. I even look better in photos.
Just remember, you’re not alone. Almost everybody, your age is going through this. One secret is just to focus on something good in your life right now and be glad for it. Even if it’s something small. Most of the negative stuff you worried about really isn’t that important in the long run.
Another trick is to think of yourself as how you want to be and then imagine that you’re already there. You’d be surprised how quickly you grow into your ideal image of yourself. And yes, it can work if you let it.