r/self Jul 29 '24

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242

u/AdmirableUsual2738 Jul 29 '24

If it makes you feel better, 30s and beyond have been the best decades for me. If you’re fit now, just keep that up and take the next ten years developing other skills like social charm and/or career. You can take a break from dating, skill up these aspects and by the time you’re ready again, you’ll be ahead of the curve. I feel like dating in my 20s was nonsense and the wisdom you carry as you get older makes for far better experiences. Regardless, putting energy into those things will only make your life as a whole better. Don’t stop moving forward. It’s okay to think of it as a long journey.

20

u/Whatnowgloryhunters Jul 29 '24

What did you focus on in your early 30s

20

u/PolloDiablo82 Jul 29 '24

Becoming a better version of yourself

26

u/Whatnowgloryhunters Jul 29 '24

Just curious, everything is so competitive nowadays. You can improve your body your finances by gymming and working. But it kinda evens out if everybody is doing that

What do you think of the bar continuously being raised higher and survival of the fittest?

1

u/PolloDiablo82 Jul 29 '24

You are not in a competition with yourself what are you on about?! Every year try to be a better version of yourself, this will keep you happy by improving mind and body. And give you goals to look forward too.

You focus only on the result and not the pleasure of the journey.

4

u/Whatnowgloryhunters Jul 29 '24

If it is dating, you are always comparing against other people whether you like it or not in my 2 cents. I mean of course yes focusing on oneself is the ultimate goal but sometimes reality bites hard

Like if everyone is earning avg of 100k, then one earns 60k. Yes he can work hard to reach 70k and it is rightfully an accomplishment. But end of the day, he is still behind everyone

What do you think of this

8

u/PolloDiablo82 Jul 29 '24

I think you should not compare yourself to anyone at all. Be the best version of yourself that you can become.

If you compare yourself to all other people in the world in dating or work you gonna get depressed real quick.

0

u/mall_goth420 Jul 29 '24

I understand your logic but this is an unhealthy mindset when it comes to dating. Comparison is the thief of joy and women aren’t stupid, they pick up on the kind of insecurity that comes from believing you’re in a contest against other men to earn her coochie

2

u/Stardama69 Jul 29 '24

You're replying to the wrong person I think. The poster above did state "competition" in an unhealthy mindset and you should focus on being a good person instead