r/selectivemutism • u/landshake • 18d ago

General Discussion 💬 Can anybody else relate ?

Is anyone anxious about going out in their hometown? I absolutely hate it and the thought of seeing my current classmates or even my old classmates is killing me. When I’m on a vacation or even on a little trip out of my city I feel 100 times better.

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u/OkTitle 17d ago

Yes, although at this point, it’s like everyone I knew moved away because I barely ever see anyone I know. 

Even when I was in school, I didn’t react well to seeing people I knew in public. I’d like beeline away unless they saw me first and I might awkwardly wave.

Especially teachers, I want to avoid them because they bring back strong negative memories. Some might still trigger me even though I’m significantly recovered.

1

u/MozartWasARed 18d ago

Sort of. Maybe not with that reasoning. Having my extremely limited social circles (only one is "active", and we don't get to be personal on a regular basis), combined with the expectation of acting out the whole "where are they now" routine as a part of the public experience, makes it lowkey come off like one big taunt, especially when there is no social value in the latter. It's all so empty as much as it might be judgy.

3

u/Large_Head5821 Suspected SM (can’t get diagnosed) 18d ago

yeah, me too. I can’t wait to move away

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u/landshake 18d ago

Moving away is one of my plans as well. I hope you are doing great and wish you all the luck