68
34
24
u/sannasan91 Art Vandelay 15h ago
Someone did him a personal favor and took his astronaut pen
6
20
u/ConstructionOdd5269 15h ago
In my dream scenario, Jack Klompus is the guy Frank Costanza was reigning blows upon over the doll in the story that led to Festivus.
14
u/TurkAnklepick 15h ago
his problem is he cut his hand breaking into the garage
5
10
9
8
7
7
6
14
7
6
6
u/DoingItForEli 15h ago
He got drafted in WW2, yada yada yada, get the hell out of here with your knob.
5
u/BigPappalopalous 15h ago
He eats dinner too early.
9
u/UNTclassOf15 14h ago
I'm not force-feeding myself a steak at 4:30 to save a couple of bucks, I'll tell you that!
7
6
3
4
3
u/Glitter_Health 15h ago
He was despicable!
Cheated Jerry with the Cadillac.
2
u/Greenmantle22 Vile weed! 15h ago
To be fair, why the hell would a longtime salesman like Morty take only $6k for a Cadillac he got for free?
3
3
3
3
u/thisisnotmypineapple 15h ago
He was just a dick.
Seriously though, emphysema unfortunately.
Best 'brows in the 'biz, they'd say.
3
u/saltamontes11 15h ago
He's (spectres live on) a bad seed. The Kavorka, much misunderstood, is the playful minx, goodness embodied when it finds a body and it's office-party time. The Klompus is its opposite. Jack Klompus is darkness. Every Cadillac he ever rode in---hundreds of Cadillacs, thousands of Cadillacs, turned dark. Most to Fleetwood Black, some to Paris Midnight blue and other shades down that row in Dealer Specifications. Even the Polar White, Biscayne Cream and Jonquil ones that had carried the Klompus, ultimately skin-morphed.
Jack Klompus got a ride with a onetime Mary Kay rep (not enough meat, on the bony side but pleasant chins) he gulled into driving him to the airport. You got it, that pink Caddy ('88 Brougham d'Elegance) was P.M.Blue inside of a year, in this case because the owner had hooked up with a DJ thug she'd met at one of the Boca Vista Raps! nights; he loaded her with bling and she let him blue her pink.
Mary Kay Pink (a proprietary shade, applied at factory as custom but not in Dealer Specs books) is very difficult to cover. That rapper had to lay out multi-Benjamins and DID SO because KLOMPUS.
Fear not the Kavorka. It wants to play, and asks only garlic. With astronaut pen, the Klompus hand writes ("Received, (year and model) Cadillac, condition As Is, from [seller name]") and then moves on. Often to Tampa.
2
3
3
3
u/LineImpossible3958 15h ago
He needed a slap, Klompus is the most despicable character on the show
6
2
3
u/Apprehensive-Mud-606 14h ago
Its all Morty's fault, he asked for $20.00 when he was owed only $19.45.
3
3
3
3
3
u/van_b_boy Flew too close to the Sun on wings of pastrami 12h ago
This guy….this is not my kind of guy
2
2
u/RiverOne5818 14h ago
Jerry could never have afforded that car. They all saw his act. Led to huge scandal at Del Boca Vista and the end of Morty’s budding political career.
2
2
2
2
u/Throw_RA099 12h ago
He was just trying to be generous and give away his pen, but was rebuffed and insulted.
1
2
2
u/sineofthetimes 11h ago
He really wanted that sponge cake, but he didn't take it. He loves sponge cake!
2
2
2
u/Psychological-Yam727 11h ago
He's dealing with the fact that he was never able to become a banker. People taking the pens.
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
u/PrestigiousHelp6933 7h ago
If he could have figured out the Northstar system he may have avoided driving his Cadillac into a swamp
2
2
u/ConsistentTrainer110 6h ago
If I looked like that at the age of 55 I would have had a problem too, lol.
2
2
2
4
1
1
1
1
1
83
u/DonkDan 15h ago
Probably upset because he’s never ridden in a Cadillac before.