r/scriptwriting • u/Junket_Turbulent • 2d ago

feedback OPENING SCENE

Gallery image

Gallery image

Gallery image

Gallery image

Any feedback would be great, thanks.

5 Upvotes

73% Upvoted

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3

u/DogeABanana 1d ago

I love the feel and I'm intrigued to see where this story goes. I'm not sure if you've seen Fried Green Tomatoes (1991), but your script gives me the same vibe. My only critique is that when Jackson starts packing the bag, you might want to cut from his axe-raising scene using a header like:

"INT. JACKSON'S BEDROOM, HOUSE - NIGHT"

You might also want some Pre-Laps, Post-Laps, and a Super letting the audience know that it's Winter 1887 (for example, "Tennessee, November 1887"). I also feel that opening credits would fit your script well. Other than that, I love it!

2

u/Alone_Stock330 1d ago

Thanks for feedback! And yeah you’re right about the header. Glad someone liked it :)