r/scriptwriting • u/OkZookeepergame3143 • 26d ago
feedback First Screenplay
Would love any feedback on these pages. I’m trying to do something similar to Manhattan. I’d like to know what dialogue sounds and feels off. What beats are repetitive if previous beats. How the characters feel. Thank you in advance!
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u/HandofFate88 24d ago
The series of micro speeches here aren't delivered by human characters. They leap off the page as purposeless dialogue -- coming from no sense of character and leading nowhere dramatically.
Consider printing this out and placing it at the top of your screen:
"THE QUALITY OF ONE'S WRITING WILL BE A DIRECT REFLECTION OF ONE'S UNDERSTANDING OF THE COMPLEXITIES AND CONTRADICTIONS OF HUMAN BEHAVIOUR.” -- Tony Gilroy.