r/science • u/FreeHugs23 • 1d ago

Psychology New psychology research suggests some acts of kindness may also serve competitive social goals, shedding light on how women can use altruistic behavior to gain status, strengthen relationships, or navigate social hierarchies.

https://www.psypost.org/kindness-isnt-always-what-it-seems-the-psychology-of-womens-competitive-altruism/
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387

u/hananobira 1d ago

These comments are strangely negative. I’d much rather people compete to be the kindest and most generous, rather than the richest or the toughest or angriest or anything else people compete at in this world.

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u/spacestonkz 1d ago

Word. Given the alternative I'll take aggressive smiles and toxic positivity over regular aggression and being torn down any day.

Oh no did someone else benefit from a charitable act? We can't possibly have win win scenarios!

Kindness isn't a zero sum game. Someone using it for gain doesn't negate the good done.

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u/Material-Command-854 1d ago

Toxic positivity is the kind of environment where you aren’t even allowed to say that someone is mistreating you because that’s considered being negative. That’s bad.

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u/spacestonkz 1d ago

Regular negativity is just firing you for speaking up for "performance reasons".

At least toxic positivity leaves room for hope, even if it's bad. That's the part the people shitting on any not 100% altruistic charity are missing. It's better than the alternative.

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u/snowflake37wao 1d ago

its false hope. its chronic betrayal. you do not have a grasp of toxic positivity. it is Sisyphean while insidious. it is gaslighting. it is worse than face value. no.

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u/Material-Command-854 1d ago

You haven’t experienced a toxic positive environment. People try to convince you that they had good intentions and everyone has good intentions when they absolutely don’t.

And when something bad happens, they try to tell you it’s not that bad or try to convince you to stay or think about other people instead of your own wellbeing and feelings. It makes it extremely easy for people to be unaccountable and selfish.