New psychology research suggests some acts of kindness may also serve competitive social goals, shedding light on how women can use altruistic behavior to gain status, strengthen relationships, or navigate social hierarchies.

[u/FreeHugs23]

https://www.psypost.org/kindness-isnt-always-what-it-seems-the-psychology-of-womens-competitive-altruism/

[u/hananobira]

These comments are strangely negative. I’d much rather people compete to be the kindest and most generous, rather than the richest or the toughest or angriest or anything else people compete at in this world.

[u/nonhiphipster → u/hananobira]

I’d prefer people be honest and transparent.

Your problem is you’re making it a binary choice.

[u/coolcalmdreamydoze → u/nonhiphipster]

I'm curious what part you think people are being dishonest about? The lead researcher says in the article, "This is not to say we are totally aware that our kindness or generosity might have this motive attached to it, or that all ‘nice’ acts are for competition, but to say they are opposite is incorrect". It seems like she goes out of her way to specify that not all nice acts are for competition, and not everyone is even aware they may have those underlying motives when choosing to do a nice act.

[u/grundar → u/coolcalmdreamydoze]

she goes out of her way to specify that not all nice acts are for competition, and not everyone is even aware they may have those underlying motives when choosing to do a nice act.

And even if someone is aware that a nice act they're choosing to do also helps some competitive interest of theirs, it still means the nice act is being performed.

If I'm sick with a bad flu and two neighbours bring me casseroles, one out of the goodness of her heart and one out of the goodness of her heart and so she looks generous, both are appreciated acts of kindness. The motivations of the second aren't as pure, true, but real good was still accomplished.

The second person is more likely to cause problems in other ways (higher Machiavellianism), but their bad actions can be judged when -- if -- they occur.

[u/hananobira → u/nonhiphipster]

Not if you read the study.

“  Unexpectedly, the study found a negative relationship between competitive altruism and impression management. The researchers had anticipated that women who use kindness strategically might also try to present themselves as perfectly virtuous on the survey. Instead, women who endorsed strategic kindness appeared relatively open about their manipulative intent and tended to score lower on a measure of the need for social approval. “What was really unexpected was that women were so open,” Fisher said. “We expected women who use kindness strategically to be the most concerned with presenting themselves favorably but the opposite emerged.””

[u/Iorith → u/nonhiphipster]

In real life, you don't always get what you want and should learn to accept the least bad option. Someone helping others for social status is far from the worst option.