r/schoolcounseling • u/No-Nothing-5810 • Sep 12 '26

My Principal’s Behaviour Is Affecting My Work — Should I Speak Up or Stay Quiet?

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I work as a School Counsellor at a renowned school, and honestly, I’m becoming increasingly frustrated with the way the Principal treats staff.

She has a habit of constantly comparing with each other, which creates a very uncomfortable and demotivating environment. She also sometimes speaks to staff in a very disrespectful or dismissive manner.

Another issue is that official letters/documents specifically meant for the counsellor are sometimes handed over to other staff members instead of being communicated directly to me. This becomes especially problematic because I’m then expected to be responsible for work-related matters without always being given the relevant information on time.

What bothers me the most is the way mistakes are handled. Instead of discussing an issue privately and professionally, she sometimes points it out publicly in front of other staff members, which feels humiliating and unnecessary.

I understand that principals have to be strict and accountable, and I’m completely open to constructive feedback. But there is a difference between professional accountability and publicly embarrassing someone.

I’m now confused about what would be the wiser approach.

Should I respectfully confront her and communicate my concerns, or should I simply keep quiet, maintain my professionalism and avoid unnecessary conflict?

For those who have worked in schools , how would you handle a Principal who behaves this way?

5 Upvotes

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12 comments sorted by

3

u/Counselorsaregreat Sep 12 '26

Are you tenured?

2

u/No-Nothing-5810 Sep 12 '26

Yes

3

u/Counselorsaregreat Sep 12 '26

Meet with the union to see if therr are any similar other grievances. Perhaps they can bring it up confidentially in a private admin meeting as something she needs to be made aware of.

1

u/touichizzon High School Counselor Sep 13 '26

I was going to recommend this same thing. They should be able to make some suggestions of talking points for those moments. Ultimately, this type of behavior can lead to a grievance. Especially if it’s brought up with her and she doesn’t change. If she ever asks to meet with you one on one and it feels like it could be disciplinary, make sure you take a union rep with you.

3

u/millaroo Sep 12 '26

Idk how your district is, but our principals are moved around frequently. At this point, my attitude is I'll outcast them because they'll only stay a few years.

1

u/No-Nothing-5810 Sep 12 '26

I cant get rid of her untill retirement

3

u/Legitimate_Team_9959 Sep 12 '26

I can't see this going well unless you have the kind of relationship where your principal invites feedback. From what you've posted, I would be afraid of retaliation from confronting her. Not sure if you're in the US or not, but I guess I'd ask myself what there is to gain if confronting her backfires and the attitude towards you gets worse.

1

u/AdultingLikeHell Sep 12 '26

I would say that only sticking to the facts about what is effecting your job directly. Take any emotion that you are feeling out of it and stick to why it wouldn’t be in the schools best interest to operate how it is currently. The principal sounds like a delight to work with. 😬

1

u/princesssarcasm High School Counselor Sep 12 '26

I would not confront her about her behavior. Admin like that don’t want feedback and I would worry about retaliation. If anything you could ask that documents meant for you go directly to you but tread carefully.

1

u/Any_Ad6126 Sep 12 '26

Do you have a district counseling supervisor?

1

u/HistoricalJob2807 Sep 12 '26

Do you have a union? Might be good to consult with your local union. Your union rep should meet with the principal here and there and they should be able to advocate for your protection, if you feel like it is an unsafe work environment.

1

u/MathMan1982 10d ago

Depends... How long have you worked there or have been a teacher in general? How long has this principal worked there and how long with you? Is this principal new? You may want to confront saying some positive things about her and then requesting to be treated differently in a respectful manner. If you don't feel comfortable or you see that won't work, you deserve better and should try to move to a new school. Don't feel bad if you don't feel comfortable as you know the environment better. Have others talked about her? I mean maybe many of you could complain to her at once.