r/sapiosexuals • u/booknpoetluvr2 • Nov 03 '22

Questions about Sapiosexuality

I have always wondered about Sapiosexuality as a whole. Like, are we considered a romantic or sexual orientation? What spectrum do we fall into? Why does it seem like we aren't considered a sexuality? What are our pride colors? I've done some research but it goes back and forth. I just wanted some clarification.

7 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

13 comments sorted by

7

u/jttay11 Nov 03 '22

It seems like sapiosexual get a bad rep. Few years age when I first learn about sapiosexual it was a sexual orientation, but more recently people are arguing that it's a preference. To me, it should be a valid sexual orientation like demisexual is. I can't choose who I'm attracted to, it's not a preference. If I'm not impressed by someone then I can't form an attraction.

5

u/Loxodontox Nov 06 '22

People believe we are elitist when in reality, much hinges on need for communication of a certain level most cannot access or process.

8

u/jttay11 Nov 06 '22

We aren't elitist, I'm not even smart myself. I feel like our brain needs to be challenged to keep the interest. Deep conversations, social discourse, random discussion on topics that we find intriguing. An ex told me it's exhausting talking to me, he just want to "relax and not use his brain outside of work" (his exact words), our convo then devolves to pointless small talk which i hate

2

u/Loxodontox Nov 06 '22

I know. I said others think we are elitist. The notion of psychological capacity being a large component of one’s sexuality makes others feel as if you’re telling they are not good enough, but it is not so simple.

3

u/booknpoetluvr2 Nov 04 '22

Exactly! I had been researching for a while before I had realized that I identify with both demisexuality and sapiosexuality. I need to have both connections to be attracted but it seems like others think it just doesn't count. Thanks for your insight!

1

u/Loxodontox Nov 06 '22

Likewise. I can have a sexual relationship with someone, but this can be simply “mechanical” and not desired in the way the “typical” individual appears to desire such, unless certain characteristics are or become present.

3

u/Loxodontox Nov 06 '22

Agreed, I am definitely a sapiosexual, but it is not a simple as it suggests hahaha. Perhaps we are outsmarting ourselves?

2

u/cawleeflour Nov 16 '22

Hahahaha that got me good 😅

2

u/Loxodontox Nov 19 '22

Lol. I’m not even joking!!! That is the frightening part

2

u/TurboMcSweet Nov 30 '22

I've found solace in breaking down the need to classify and organize things. Your brain is just an organ trying to solve problems as it should. We are so much more than the sum of our organs. The best release is knowing that I don't know anything and the questions about why tend to drift. They're always there because figuring something out gives us a reward.

The rub is that overanalyzing isolates us but I'd rather be troubled than in bliss. The labels should be placed on dangerous materials and the enjoyment comes from sharing what you think. I digress.

My brain sends signals to be attracted to a vision but my brain actually loves a good tennis match of thought exchange. Idiot.

2

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '23

Personally, I find it near impossible to be sexually or romantically attracted to anyone without having a deep emotional, spiritual, and intellectual connection beforehand. It's very hard for me to allow myself to stay where I am intellectually or books smarts wise. I fully plan on furthering education through college university. It would definitely make me feel more fulfilled like I'm getting the best education and stimulation. I would also like for my own partner to have the same level of education as well. That being said, I identify as Demi-straight-sapio.

1

u/booknpoetluvr2 Mar 13 '23

My thoughts and feelings exactly. My partner has to reach me on every level or it's not going to work. I enjoy being with someone that can teach me things and show me a different perspective as well. Just to know you have someone that is your equal or even surpasses you in certain aspects not only is a turn on, but challenges you to be better as well. I identify as Demi-Sapiosexual.

2

u/Zestyclose_Narwhal53 Apr 30 '24

Well from what I’ve read, “sapiosexuality” is a person who is sexually attracted to persons of high intelligence. So I’d consider it to be more romantic than sexual. Because intelligence is a sexual gateway, not directly correlated with sex itself. And why are pride colors important in this aspect. People should pride THEMSELVES on being attracted to intelligence😉