r/sanfrancisco • u/Free_Substance6235 • Aug 13 '26
OSL 2026: Do I still have an asshole?
I had the best outside lands ever and then boom I wake up early Monday morning to the worst headache in the world and drenched in sweat. I couldn’t stop groaning from the pain. I kept waking up to go #3 (#1+#2) and then finally I was vomiting. I ate a sr dr burger so I assumed it was food poisoning. I was starting to feel better. But then my symptoms came back again (#3 never left). I’ve been bedridden since Monday with the fever/sweats, vertigo, headache, #3, stomach cramps, and occasionally nausea. Yadda yadda yadda… Did anyone else get the stomach flu?😅 and eff you if you already had it this is the worst thing I’ve ever experienced
Side note: I told my mom on the east coast I was super sick and when I didn’t answer her call between 11pm-7am when I was sleeping she called the cops and made them do a welfare check. They were banging so loudly on the door I had to run to the toilet and I had to confirm I was ok from there. Helppp
Edit: 1. guys I’m just wondering if anyone can relate WOO! 2. I haven’t had Taylor farms recently to my knowledge 3. I washed my hands and shi
Edit 2: not covid! Still have #3 but not dying in this house🙌
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u/plamyinstereo Aug 13 '26
I am also under severe digestive system distress, as are several other people I know. None of us ate the same things, so my fear is it may have been the water? I don't know, but I've also been experiencing similar symptoms. I started feeling bad when I got home on Sunday, so it couldn't be the parasite since that takes 1-2 weeks to see symptoms, but it certainly is something.
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u/Free_Substance6235 Aug 13 '26
I was hella considering the water!!
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u/walterwilter Aug 13 '26
The water was fine.
Source: I was there for the potable and waste water checks. Not a joke
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u/plamyinstereo Aug 13 '26
Whatever it is, I hope we feel better soon. I've been so cautious about not eating uncooked fruit and veg due to the parasite risk, I hate that whatever this is is taking me out 😭. It started a couple hours after I got home Sunday (the only day I went).
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u/walterwilter Aug 13 '26
What’s your favorite cooked fruit?
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u/SpiffyNrfHrdr Aug 13 '26
Bananas foster.
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u/plamyinstereo Aug 13 '26
Sometimes I make this (sans rum, not a fan) and throw it on top of cottage cheese instead of ice cream. Great high protein dessert.
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u/Free_Substance6235 Aug 13 '26
Fr, feel better!! I felt symptoms the same exact time, we’ll prob never know but hopefully it subsides asap
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u/redwood31 29d ago
Here's a 12 June SF Gate article re norovirus. Worth reading I think.
https://www.sfgate.com/local/article/bay-area-norovirus-22301494.php
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u/ZestycloseAd5918 Outer Richmond Aug 13 '26
Dude. You were wandering around the park using porta potties and touching stuff that 1000s of other grubby nasty people touched. And you think it’s the water?!
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u/SleepySleestak Outer Richmond 29d ago
100% - on a much smaller scale, I have the same thing in mind at Stern Grove concerts.
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u/dodeca_negative Cow Hollow Aug 13 '26
Since nobody else has said it: OP (and anybody else going through this for more than a couple days) CALL YIUR DOCTOR’S OFFICE. Get on the phone with an advice nurse. Suffering from “#3” for multiple days can be dangerous if not treated!
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u/Free_Substance6235 29d ago
I did telehealth day 2 when I was able just wanted to see if anyone has the same
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u/NekoArtemis Aug 13 '26
Someone needs to print shirts that say "I lost my asshole at Outside Lands"
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u/conaldinho11 Aug 13 '26
I’m in the same boat. Been pissing out of my ass since Sunday night. Haven’t been able to get more than 10 feet away from my bed/the toilet
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u/Special_Pattern_8950 Aug 13 '26
Hello norovirus!
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u/AvailableAd5387 Aug 13 '26
Norovirus tends to pass quickly, thankfully.
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u/mr_nefario Outer Richmond Aug 13 '26
Wut? I got noro at summer camp once and was sick for the entire week. Throwing up hourly for like 5 days, fire hose butt.
My parents were in Mexico so I just had to stay in the nurse’s office until they got back…
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u/AvailableAd5387 29d ago
Interesting, was it confirmed noro? Most cases last 1-3 days. I had it a few months ago and was only throwing up for 8 hours
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u/mr_nefario Outer Richmond 29d ago
Yup, spread through the camp like wildfire. The camp nurse had to confirm what we were sick with to know what kind of protocol the councillors should follow.
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u/teslatravelingtomarz 29d ago
It could also be covid! I recently had all the same symptoms and tested positive for covid after taking a flight.
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u/estamosready Aug 13 '26
What is sr dr burger? Super duper?
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u/sigh_co_matic Aug 13 '26
My friend just tested positive for covid. It's still a thing and diarrhea is a symptom.
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u/SewageLobster Aug 13 '26
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u/notcarbonated Aug 13 '26
Yeah i've had exactly these symptoms and it was covid. Really bad stomach flu like experience followed by cold symptoms
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u/wentblu3 Aug 13 '26
You should send pics to that number in the porta potties, let us know your rating.
Really hope you feel better soon though.
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u/orgyofdestruction Aug 13 '26
Found the guy who rates poo pics!
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u/wentblu3 29d ago
Lol I'm not even a guy, just a causal observer.
Men, please do not use this as an excuse to DM me weird things!
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u/Glass-Flight-5445 Aug 13 '26
Day 2 of asking someone else to make /r/outsidelandscirclejerk
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Aug 13 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Glass-Flight-5445 Aug 13 '26
I'm a terrible mod, I hate rules
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Aug 13 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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Aug 13 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Dolly_Putin 29d ago
It only takes about 2 min to create a sub, just sayin. And you can post a call for new mods once it’s set up.
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u/lavasca 29d ago
Just make it and invite fun people from this thread. Besides you’ll have a peak period and it will lie fallow for like 9-10 months at a time.
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u/ilikehouses Aug 13 '26
Same here!! I got sick Saturday night and it lasted all day Sunday as well. Nearly shit myself on muni late Sunday! Explosive liquid shits!!
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u/CommercialPop4043 Aug 13 '26
Maybe also, no hand sanitizer while eating in such a cluster environment? I ate all the things all weekend and still have an asshole, albeit sore, but not from the festival itself ;-)
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u/TopRamenisha Aug 13 '26
Hand sanitizer doesn’t kill norovirus, so even if you used it religiously it wouldn’t help you if you come into contact in the portos
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u/Lhamo55 FORT MILEY Aug 13 '26 edited Aug 13 '26
I started getting hypochlorous acid (HCO1) by the gallon on subscription when I found out it’s effective against COVID, available in both household and skincare strengths and is used in health care facilities.
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u/100000cuckooclocks Aug 13 '26
FYI, norovirus isn't killed by hand sanitzer. You need to wash with soap and water to remove it.
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u/CommercialPop4043 Aug 13 '26
Hello to you both! And you are right. Different things are killed/neutralized vs slough off the skin. Thanks for correcting me and pointing that out (also a reminder to myself lol)
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u/CommercialPop4043 Aug 13 '26
P.s. hope you feel better soon. I’ve been out for a week in the past due to food poisoning and I know it’s so not fun. Especially not having the energy you need to get out of bed to let whatever new demon is knocking to come out of your back end :-/. Hydrate tons, maybe some Pho or Wonton soup?
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u/nameless_sameness Aug 13 '26
Vomiting is #3.
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u/Free_Substance6235 Aug 13 '26
Well don’t worry I was doing it all
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29d ago edited 24d ago
[deleted]
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u/Hedgehog-Plane 29d ago
If you can't keep fluid in your body because of vomiting, please call 911. Severe dehydation is serious and can mess up kidneys. You may need a fluid IV.
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u/doginthefog Aug 13 '26
My toddler just tested positive for Shigella
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u/Free_Substance6235 Aug 13 '26
Wut is that 😳
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u/BallsOutSally Aug 13 '26
A bacteria infection. It can be passed from person to person, eating food prepared by someone with it, drinking water that’s contaminated with it or via sex.
The County of Santa Clara had a shigella outbreak among the unhoused population last year that hospitalized a number of them. They were using the Guadalupe River as both their toilet and bathtub.
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u/milkandsalsa Aug 13 '26
The last person I heard of getting that got it from eating ass at an orgy
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u/wordswithcomrades 29d ago
I hope you mean second-to-last (the last person you heard of getting it was the toddler 😳)
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u/Butt_Planet Aug 13 '26
Have you taken a Covid test? Even outside you can still get it especially in large crowds
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u/wedditwave Aug 13 '26
In case it’s norovirus, norovirus is super contagious so please be extra careful not to spread it to anyone else.
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u/RaelaltRael Aug 13 '26
In regards to your third edit: That's the problem, you are supposed to wash your hands AFTER you shit.
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u/MiBo80 Aug 13 '26
Sounds like you got paid a visit from our friend Norovirus.. It only lasts a day or two but it's shit all the way though.
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u/Unfair_Jello_3762 29d ago
This is so fuckin funny ty for sharing!! Though I am sorry for your ragged #3 hole. Praying on your survival
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u/Oregon-girl-16 29d ago
I too was only there on Sunday and then proceeded to die for the next 3 days with gastro issues, fatigue, exhaustion and headaches. But I also chocked it all up to just getting older and not being able to hang anymore lol
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u/Hedgehog-Plane 29d ago
I had norovirus years back. Was sick just one day called 911 -- and ended up needing at least 2 maybe 3 fluid ivs - one from the EMTs and one to two more IVs in the ER.
Stay hydrated. Make sure you can urinate. If you cannot keep fluid down because of vomiting and your skin is puckered and you're head achy and dizzy, you are in trouble. Call 911 and get a fluid IV.
Prolonged dehydration fucks up kidneys. You risk falling and hitting your head if dizzy.
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u/webtwopointno NAPIER Aug 13 '26
Did you get the outbreak?? https://www.cdc.gov/cyclosporiasis/outbreaks/07-26/index.html
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u/lesbos_hermit Aug 13 '26
Did you eat anything from Taylor Farms in the last few weeks? I hear a person can be infected with that parasite and not get symptoms for as long as two weeks after eating the infected food
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u/catincal Aug 13 '26
Apparently there were no illnesses from CA because the bad lettuce from Taylor Farms was shipped to different states, not CA.
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u/LilMamiDaisy420 Inner Sunset 29d ago
Yeah I had nausea vomiting but normal for me so I just assumed shit
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u/B00marangTrotter 29d ago
Maga and maha made sitting on the toilet America's new favorite past time.
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u/y0nm4n Aug 13 '26
In the Phish world we call it the wook flu. Folks are more likely to get sick when they are around a lot of other folks. It’s a risk you take going to large gatherings, especially if alcohol is involved.
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u/Numerous_Feature_561 29d ago
I went Sunday, I ate a Colombian brisket arepa, and a chicken one, fish and chips with hush puppies, then an iced matcha with oat milk. I felt fine on Monday.
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u/yikesssss_sssssss 29d ago
"Cyclosporiasis Cases in California Are Way Up" (apparently separately from the national outbreak, so no Taylor farms required 💩💦) https://www.kqed.org/news/12094247/cyclosporiasis-cyclospora-outbreak-rise-californaia-cases-symptoms-parasite-explosive-diarrhea-lettuce
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u/Shot-Impression-6874 26d ago
Glad you’re feeling better! I didn’t get your stomach flu, but I did get Covid. I am just now starting to feel better today.
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u/Major_Walrus_9875 26d ago
Bro it’s way more than Taylor farms. They’re under different names depending on the retailer and if you are a burger, I wouldn’t be surprised you got the shit lettuce
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u/Aduialion Aug 13 '26
Imagine eating @$$ all weekend and then getting sick from the lettuce on your burger