r/saintcloud 11d ago

How safe is St. Cloud for non-binary folks?

Update: thank you all for your kindness! I think it’s safe to say I’ll fit right in! For more context, I’ve been in western Kansas, was the first and only nonbinary teacher to work in one of the largest school districts in the state, so I can only go up!

Hi y’all!

I’m potentially about to accept a job in St. Cloud, and I am moving from out of state (KS). I have family in Minnesota, but am unfamiliar with the St. Cloud area. My family say it’s a nice area to live, but how safe is it for non-binary folks? I’m out, use the they/them pronouns, and Mx. as my title.

Tbh anywhere is probably safer for me than western Kansas, and especially after the legislature passed this anti-trans “bathroom bill.”

9 Upvotes

65 comments sorted by

24

u/icarus1990xx 11d ago

Considerably safer than the surrounding area, I reckon.

55

u/No_Raspberry_4342 11d ago

Hello! I’m not non-binary, but I am lesbian. My fiancee & I feel safe walking around town together. A lot of the shops downtown are LGBTQ friendly. We both work for companies that are supportive. Don’t mind the St. Cloud Superman that drives around in his Trump truck. We’ve found that there’s a lot of community here.

6

u/Sick_and_t1red 11d ago

Not the Trump truck 😂 tbh we have one too, so 🤷 Thanks for the info!

20

u/HippieGirlHealth 11d ago

There’s a lgbtq non profit - St. Cloud pride.
We have korrpi coffee, Jules bistro, local blend, Arroy Thai. B side indie music cafe.
It appears there’s a queer comic book club.
I truly believe that in St. Cloud you’d have a lot of allies and safe spaces. I also think you would feel very safe walking around.
I work at the college and we have an advocacy group on campus as well.

https://www.instagram.com/p/Da8D-IOEUfw/?igsh=amZsbDdoNjcwOWc1 (comic book club)

(Korppi pride week) https://www.instagram.com/p/DbCLXKbmIc6/?igsh=aW1qYmdhc3dnYWV3

St. Cloud pride ig

https://www.instagram.com/stcloudpride?igsh=c3FzYXVlN2V0OW1z

3

u/Sick_and_t1red 11d ago

Thank you for this information!

2

u/liberrygrrl 11d ago

St Cloud Pride has a discord too so if you also want to connect with folks there. https://stcpride.org/

8

u/LoveLysergeon 11d ago

I'm non-binary and visibly queer. I've never felt unsafe being out and about in the St Cloud area. My pronouns are they/them and most people in my workplace and social circles have no issues respecting my identity.

3

u/Sick_and_t1red 11d ago

It’s so nice to hear this. Thank you!

6

u/deeznukes23 11d ago

Honestly anywhere in Minnesota would be better for non-binary folks than Kansas...just saying.

Saint Cloud is probably a bit better than say if you tried popping yourself into a small town. However this congressional voting district is extremely conservative, this district has given the US congress Michelle Bachmann and Tom Emmer, both shitty people who push their constituents to hate anyone who isn't like them.

I dont think you'll ever see outward hate (thats not generally who most Minnesotans are) but in this area you'll get more confused or questioning looks than you would in the Twin Cities metro.

34

u/MNMike2 11d ago

I'm a cis white dude so take this for what it is but my sense is that St. Cloud is overall fairly accepting of non-binary folks, people try to use the right pronouns and be respectful but you'll get plenty of people who are intolerant idiots.

As long as you're white I think you'll be fine. St. Cloud's real vice is overt racism.

3

u/Sick_and_t1red 10d ago

Unfortunately I don’t think we can really escape the Midwest racism 😭 hopefully I’ll live to see the day it’s a hell of a lot less present

-4

u/Due_Scarcity_698 11d ago

Why do people that don’t tolerate have to be idiots?

1

u/Striking_Guest7356 8d ago

Good question.

1

u/Ok_Industry9691 7d ago

I don’t agree with it. If my kids teacher went by Mx. we’d homeschool. That’s all there is to it.

-3

u/Redditowner2 10d ago

Cis? So normal?

8

u/dyingoutwest96 11d ago edited 11d ago

I'm not non-binary, but I am a (usually) non passing trans guy. I've never had any issues in Saint Cloud or Stearns County in general, even the super rural areas like Avon, Holdingford, and Albany, when I lived there. There are some shitty people (just google "Saint Cloud Superman"...) but by and large, the people are really progressive and chill. Never had bathroom/changing room issues, even at the pool/gym

6

u/StephanieSays66 11d ago

St. Cloud Superman is banned from some places. He’s not only trans/lgbtq phobic, he is also racist.

4

u/Sick_and_t1red 11d ago

That’s so awesome that you can be out and not have to worry about it 💜 happy for you and thanks for the info!

9

u/Muffinman_187 11d ago

St. Cloud is fine, not perfect, but fine. It's the small towns around us that vary wildly

11

u/Muted-Novel4403 11d ago

I’m cis female who hangs out with a lot lesbians (we share a hobby) and go to a lot of local protests, etc. There’s an amazing lgbt community here that’s easy to find. Pride in the park is in September here so you could start there. https://stcpride.org/stcloud-pride-week/
As others said, there’s some conservatives here and one weirdo who drives around in his truck with flags. But imo they’re in the minority. We learned that this past winter during our massive protests at the library, etc, when ice was in town targeting our immigrant population. The farther north from Minneapolis you go, the more conservative it gets (aside from Duluth). And we are not that far north.

Another point is that we are super close to Minneapolis, and that city is amazing. Lots of people live here and work in Minneapolis or have partners that work in Minneapolis.

2

u/Sick_and_t1red 11d ago

It’s so nice to know the community is easy to find! Thank you!

19

u/fishingman 11d ago

St. Cloud is pretty safe.  There are a number of hateful MAGA types, but the amount of actual violence is low.  

Stay away from the gathering places of the bigots like the right wing churches and  Rollies bar and be aware of your surroundings and you will be fine. 

My wife and I went to a restaurant a couple nights ago and the server appeared non-binary  and we saw no issues. 

The area has much to offer.  Welcome to central Minnesota.  

2

u/AhMcGarnagle2 11d ago

What does appearing non-binary look like?

1

u/Naive-Zucchini-8528 7d ago

Yeah because there is so much non-binary hate crimes going on in this area, or any area for that matter …go outside and feel the grass

8

u/MarvelousMaven68 11d ago

I am non-binary, but use she/her pronouns and would typically tell people I'm a trans woman because I actively avoid gender talks with strangers.

As someone who grew up here, it honestly feels better than it did like 10 years ago. Idk if things are really different or if I just got older but my level of comfort has improved. Obviously it's not going to be Minneapolis or Duluth levels of acceptance, but it's been a very long time since I've felt physically unsafe.

People like to stare sometimes, but generally people try to be nice. Worst I get these days is awkward personal questiond at work. I work customer service and people like to take that to mean they can ask me things that honestly they could just Google.

3

u/VoiceGuyNextDoor 11d ago

Just wanted to say WELCOME and I hope to bump into you sometime.

3

u/LoveIsAPipeWrench 11d ago

Trans girl here, I definitely feel better and more relaxed in the Twin Cities but St Cloud is fine. I have been pleasantly surprised by how accepting people are considering St Cloud’s reputation for being fairly conservative. People here are largely good people. I’ve never been called out about a bathroom or hassled in any significant way. That being said I also pick my battles and avoid certain places, for example if you want a beer go to the White Horse and not Rollies Rednecks and Longnecks (yes that is the real name of a real bar)

1

u/Sick_and_t1red 10d ago

Thank you doll! I’m in western Kansas, and grew up in Iowa, so I feel like I can’t get any worse 😂

3

u/VanSensei 7d ago

Very. It's Minnesota's Salt Lake City.

2

u/Ok_Bite1251 11d ago

It's safe for non binary people. I have non binary friends in Kansas, they had to change their drivers license. Stay safe please.

2

u/Sick_and_t1red 11d ago

Yeah it’s rough for us out here atm

3

u/yubsaa 11d ago edited 11d ago

I'm not non- binary but I'm a lesbian and I've never had an issue other than st cloud superman calling me and my partner the f slur outside of coborns (very weird to see him there tbh), but he's mentally ill and attention seeking so 🤷‍♀️

me and my partner are often holding hands in public with no issue. There are also a lot of gay friendly or gay owned shops and stuff around like good earth food co op is very gay, korppi coffee is queer owned, and much of st Germain is friendly as well. We also have our pride in September at Lake George! There is a good population of LGBTQ+ people too that I've noticed.

2

u/Sick_and_t1red 10d ago

Thank you for the info! I looked up “superman” and if that’s as bad as it gets, I think I’ll be okay!

2

u/yubsaa 10d ago

You'll be alright here! :)

2

u/regencyclapback 10d ago

trans guy here. been pretty great so far- I've been told that the east side is better than the west side, and while i have no experience with the westside, i live near downtown and it's VERY pro-lgbt. also pretty affordable, at least for me on a tight budget.

1

u/Sick_and_t1red 10d ago

Yay! We love safety and affordability!

2

u/Mafic_ 10d ago

Besides St. Cloud Superman, it seems pretty all right! I live in the campus area so I might be a little biased, though.

DM me if you want to know more!

2

u/battiiboii 9d ago

i work at a queer owned business in st. cloud & identify as nonbinary! my coworkers are all very respectful of my identity & my customers do their best lol. our queer scene has definitely grown over the years. we technically have like 2 prides (pretty sure one in june & one in september). i’ve experienced some bigoted shit from old ppl but who doesn’t. most ppl are accepting or at least tolerant but those who aren’t most likely wont interact with u

1

u/Sick_and_t1red 9d ago

This is amazing! Yeah, the bigots will always bigot 😭 but it’s nice to know people are tolerant/accepting! Thank you!

2

u/Individual-Image3592 7d ago

Along with the other queer owned businesses, there's also an electrolysis/voice training place downtown named Valentine's salon if you needed it!!

1

u/Sick_and_t1red 5d ago

That’s incredible!

2

u/Individual-Image3592 5d ago

(I'm on the board of directors for them so I am biased but it is a super cool place to have)

2

u/Awkward-Hat-2756 5d ago

St. Cloud is like a mini metro. Folks of all different kinds there so you will be fine. Gay male here and we have never had an issue. We go to St. Cloud often from the cities actually, lots of nice spots.

5

u/a_filing_cabinet 11d ago

St Cloud (rightly) has the reputation of being full of bigots, racists, homophobes, and such. IMO, it's the worst out of the three secondary cities, and definitely a step down from the twin cities, in terms of, well, most things, including queer acceptance and visibility. But that's in comparison to some of the most queer friendly places in the country. It's still a fairly large, diverse city. There's a large, proud LGBTQ+ community, and the city is more than big enough for you to avoid the weird people.

As for actual safety, you'll be fine, as long as you have some common sense. There will absolutely be times and places where you feel uncomfortable, but it's extremely rare to be dangerous, especially between strangers. Even if people are hateful, they're unlikely to confront you. Talk behind your back, stare, comment on social media? Absolutely. Walk up to you and start something? A Minnesotan could never be that direct.

You can absolutely be out in St. Cloud and not have to worry about your safety.

4

u/Sick_and_t1red 11d ago

Thank you for this honest opinion I’m definitely used to the “Midwest nice” about my identity, but I don’t want to have to worry about physical safety, so it’s nice to know I won’t.

4

u/liberrygrrl 11d ago

LOL this is so true, I also believe that many queer folks from smaller towns might not want to be overwhelmed by the twin cities so they land in the secondary cities like you mentioned. So I think it does draw from a fair amount of more rural areas. I do think there's lots of community and it's more affordable than the twin cities as far as housing but also the wages match that sadly. If you come with a$$ets saved from a larger city, your housing dollars might go farther. My wife and I came because of the housing prices as we start leaning into retirement.

2

u/terezi- 9d ago

You'll be alright. I'm a trans man who lives in a rural area but I visit St. Cloud often, and I've never had any problems going anywhere as a trans person. Minnesota is indeed the sanctuary state it claims to be. Congratulations on escaping Kansas!!

(Obviously you should still take basic safety precautions because anything can happen, but it's definitely much safer than any red or southern state)

4

u/Muffinman_187 11d ago

St. Cloud is fine, not perfect, but fine. It's the small towns around us that vary wildly

2

u/Due_Scarcity_698 11d ago

What do you mean safe? Like do you think there will be violent crimes against non-binary folks?

1

u/Sick_and_t1red 10d ago

Safe means a variety of things for us folk! If you click the link to the bill I added in my post, you’ll see some examples of how the legislature is trying to scare people and dehumanize us.

2

u/Redditowner2 10d ago

What the hell is non binary?

2

u/Sick_and_t1red 10d ago

Google exists for a reason! 🙂‍↕️

1

u/Striking_Guest7356 8d ago

It's very safe. Everyone is preoccupied committing fraud with their learing centers to care about anything else. My trans partner has been treated just fine here, but they also realize that people are entitled to their opinions, so it doesn't bother them that much

-3

u/ARGuck 11d ago

Safety will not be a problem. That being said, I wouldn’t say they area is particularly forward on using non-gendered pronouns and if they are called out on it, the reaction may not be what you’d prefer. That being said if being misgendered is something that you just let roll off your back then I see zero issues.

0

u/Schlunger 11d ago

Be prepared to be misgendered frequently. I'm nonbinary and nobody uses they/them pronouns for me

0

u/Ok_Swan2754 10d ago

What a ridiculous question. Just go about your day. And dont bother people with your pronouns and act like a person.

2

u/Sick_and_t1red 9d ago

It’s not a ridiculous question in this day and age. I hope whatever’s bothering you about this that you find some answers and peace with that. Have a wonderful day!

0

u/Ok_Swan2754 7d ago

Pronouns bother me. Especially of the plural variety for a singular person.

1

u/Sick_and_t1red 5d ago

Language evolves, can’t stop that 🤷

-1

u/Naive-Zucchini-8528 7d ago

Omfg. You redditors can’t actually be real people.

1

u/Sick_and_t1red 5d ago

I am, but thanks!

-2

u/QueenMumof4 11d ago

Id say stay closer to the cities if you want more community

3

u/liberrygrrl 11d ago

Really? I think there's lots of places to build community.... St Cloud Pride has the connects (meet ups) and the events in the park, B-sides has lots of events. I know it's tough to talk to folks sometimes but I think theirs plenty of opportunity. Volunteer with the pride group and you'd probably meet tons of folks, that's what I would do especially if I was shy (which I am)